I am 22 years old and been having this problem since I was 17 years old. I first noticed it when I was in a meeting and I was talking to a lady and found her really rude and judgemental for a professional worker I jumped across the table and punched her in the face a few times after a little while I was eventually pulled off and escort out. I could not believe what happened after the incident I was in terrible rage uncontrollable shakes. I told my mum of the incident and she upset and shocked and had a serious talk with me. I sat down one night and try to come to a conclusion for my anger and believe it had something to do with childhood, when I was younger I was quite a big girl and school life was terrible then one day I thought that's it time for change I went from a size 20 to a size 10 and everything seemed so much better but in my heart i wanted revenge on them people that made me feel so low and this broke out and lead to exclusions and uncontrollable behaviour. I have been in trouble with the police and banned from places due to my anger. When I was growing up I never felt like anyone was there for me I honestly felt pushed out but I thought his was due to how I was acting?!. I have never had a good relationship with dad, I have been in a abusive relationship, I have been back stapped from people I have trusted and this has let to uncontrollable rage. Since I have had my son for 3 years now I have not had any fights or unacceptable behaviour I needed to change for my son. However I still feel deeply anger and feel if someone was to push my button's so far I will snap and defend myself in the wrong way. I also suffer from mental health problems what I have seeked help for and under control. But I have asked a number of agencies for anger management courses and I keep getting told there is nothing really for women. Is this true? And I would like to seek help for this if available and also for my mood swings.
No judging! And thank you for taking time to read.