Dear mysteryrashplzhelp,
You may think everyone is oblivious. My guess is that those around you know, even if it’s just subconsciously. You need to seek help from eating disorder specialists to get the help you need.
To learn more about anorexia and bulimia and their medical complications, visit the bella vita website.
Best,
Dr Patricia Pitts
The Bella Vita
Los Angeles, CA
As I am not an expert I do not know if you are dying but about the purging even when you dont really want to, try pepto bismal after your one meal, it keeps you from feeling physically ill after eating. Thats what I had to do to help me in my recovery from bulimia Good luck!