Agoraphobia

[SatinkaMiakoda]

I am an agoraphobic which means I cant handle being in crowded places. I have trouble meeting new people. I got a new Dr. and he told me, "People who are agoraphobic just don't get out and that's why they are afraid of people." I keep running this through my mind. When I am around people I have anxiety attacks and I wish I could stop them. I am on 3 types of medications for this. What should I do about this Dr. Is he right. He makes me feel like I can stop the way I feel and I know that maybe to a point I can. I have been going to a therapist who is work with me on coping with people.

This is part of My Traumatic Stress Disorder. Without getting to deep into the story, I was beat nearly to death.  This Dr. Makes me feel like all I have to do is get out, how can I do that when I cant even walk outside with out an attack. If it was that easy for me I would have been out doing anything and everything i could think of. Should I change Dr.s?

[peggy64]

Do you have a friend or relative, someone you feel safe with, that would get out with you? That would give you some security while you are taking those first steps. It will be hard, and very scary. You just have to keep saying to yourself, "no, I will not quit. I will take the next step, even though it will be hard. I CAN DO IT!" And keep taking that next step.

[MrGreen]

I have the same disorder as yourself. Housebound for over a decade. But then came the fight back. Not wanting to be housebound any more. It was far from easy. The thing is that you have to want to do it for yourself. Not for others. It was a long slow process. Putting myself out there were it hurt the most. But I took baby steps. After spending so many years in the house, what was the hurry now? Used to stand at my hall door to begin with. Until I got comfortable with that. May sound silly. But it is all about the body getting used to feelings all over again. Bit like we have to retrain ourselves how to live again. My second step was only out to the front garden. Again nothing major. You can work the rest of my story out for yourself. No need to bore you with it.

But what your doctor is saying is that by staying in we get used to been alone. So if we were to suddenly find ourselves in a crowded place we wouldn't know how to handle it. We would most probably run. As we have our safe areas. But to run is not going to help us beat the disorder. Exposure to it helps us adapt to it. The more we exposure ourselves to situations we hate most the lesser the bad feelings become. It is far from as easy as I make it sound. Took me ages. Then I got setbacks at times. When I had to pick myself up and start all over again.

Your doctor is going on the same principle as I stated above. I mean it is something you have to learn. Through theraphy and the likes. Where I don't disagree with your doctor. If he is coming across like a smug moron, and making it sound like it is your fault, then I would look for another doctor. Ones who understands it will take time. A lot of time.

Just hope you find the answers you are looking for. Always here if you need help.

[peggy64]

You just have to be patient with yourself. You went through a horrific ordeal, and getting frustrated with yourself for not dealing with it better will only add stress and hinder the healing process.

YOU need to decide if you need to change drs. If you feel like he is not helping, or understanding, or listening.

The question I guess to ask yourself is: am I mad because I think he told me the truth or am I mad because he does not understand or know how to help someone in my situation? and go from there.  

MOst of us have to change drs several times till we find the one that we believe can help us.