I'm online researching all of my symptoms using all possible combinations of keywords... That's how obsessed and anxious I am. I've been suffering from generalized anxiety, panic attacks and depression for the past almost five years, and been on paroxetine for the same length of time.
I have a terrible, constant fear of dying... I am a complete hypochondriac which is ironical as my life style is hardly healthy - I smoke, eat junk food and am very overweight (my weight went from 67kilos before paroxetine and onset of panic attacks/anxiety/depression to a whopping 136kilos). Since February I lost around 5 kilos but that's it.
I've been monitoring my blood pressure and heart rate on and off for a while now, recently I've become obsessed with it, measuring it like 20-50 times a day. Up until 2-3 weeks ago my normal BP averaged at around 115/75 and pulse around 70-75. About a month ago I started to work, and my job requires me to be physically active (I'm a horse riding instructor and trainer). After working for a week (ant it was a physically demanding week) I started feeling rather dizzy, tired, weak, getting sweaty spells. Started taking my BP again - and it was around 100/60 (as low as 95/55 on few occasions), with a pulse of 50-55 (was as low as 44 at one point).
Then - my BP remained really low, even at work, but resting pulse during daytime, at work, became around 80. Then in the evenings my BP would come up to 120/80 but my pulse would come down to around 60. So low pulse+higher BP and high pulse + lower BP. Even when I take my BP at work, straight after doing some physical activity, it's never over 108 or 113 over 65 or 70, and in about 5-10mins drops to about 105/65 or 100/60.
On my days off (like today) my heart rate often goes low (and BP is low, too) and it feels really uncomfortable, and I feel palpitations along with the slow rate, my chest feels kind of heavy and I am short of breath. It gets my so anxious I cannot function properly. I'm tired, slightly dizzy, disoriented, very anxious and frustrated... On top of that I have a toddler who's almost 2yrs old and requires A LOT of attention a.t.m., which I can not give to him as I'm constantly worrying about my heart and dying from heart attack, cardiac arrest, etc, and keep taking my BP... My husband is frustrated with me as well which doesn't help.
Today I was feeling so helpless because of all my symptoms I was crying my eyes out... I feel like I'm on a rapid road to death and I don't want to be...
A week ago I had an EKG, which stated I have 1st degree AV block, but was otherwise normal. My doc said it was nothing to worry about. Easy for her to say... I also had lot of blood tests done last week - my thyroid hormone levels are fine, so is my blood sugar, potassium, magnesium, iron, etc. But that still doesn't make me feel better - i still feel dizzy, have low BP and very varying pulse, palpitations...
What the HELL is wrong with me... Are all of my symptoms controlled by my anxiety??? Why has my BP dropped so much since I started working? I'm not exactly athletic (although I used to be) or anything, just normally active now...
Should I get more in depth tests done on my heart?