Hello, I am a 17 year old male and I think I may be suffering with HOCD, I’m not 100% positive though. When I was about 9 years old, my dad’s ex’s son (who is the same age as I am) starting wanting to do “inappropriate” activity with me, and being that I was so young I just went along with it. This would happen a few times per time I was at that house (I went between going to my mom’s and dad’s) and this didn’t stop until I was about 13, I didn’t see my dad for about a year and when I did start seeing him again he had his own place and had broken up with his ex. When I was 16, I fell in love with this girl, but we were only together for a almost three months because of distance, her stressing me out, and problems we were having. See, at the height of the problems started, she wouldn’t want to sext me anymore and that really hit me by screwing up my confidence, raising my anxiety levels, and making me depressed. I broke up with this girl in February and ever since then I haven’t really been the same. I used to be such a love-a-holic so to speak, and since then I haven’t really been able to consistently find girls attractive and fall in love with one. Then, in about August-September time, I was in bed, thinking about girls and why I can’t seem to love like I used to then… BAM! I started thinking about the incidents that took place at my dad’s when I was little. I instantly curled up in a ball and started telling myself “NO! NO! NO! Ever since then I can’t do anything (go out in public, go to school, watch TV, go on my social media) without having these gay thoughts. All these thoughts have just made me so confused, irritable, stressed, forgetful (memory), sleepless or fatigued, and has just amplified the problems I’ve been having with girls recently. I don’t know what I’m going through, I just want a label to be put on it so I can go about fixing this. I want to be happy again, and most importantly… I want me back. Any insight/opinions will be truly appreciated.