Fearing of destiny, anxious

[Lolololo83]

I am 38 year old married and has kids, hyper guy, good personality in front of public but I am very weak person and always thinking.
Ex: my mother living with cancer since 4 years, I care too much about her and I always thinking about her what if she has pain what if she died what if what if…..
Also thinking about sickness ex: I went to massage Centre and met a girl she gave me a handjob only but once I finish I search too much about HIV and how I live with. I have always headache because of thinking and shortage in sleeping.
I know my problem but I can’t treat my self .
Anyone has suggestion to me will be greatfull

[Paxiled]

Therapy.  You need therapy.  When an anxiety problem becomes chronic, that's the person to see.  Your HIV fear was of course irrational, as you had no risk, so maybe studying up on how one actually does get it will help you calm down about it.  As for your Mom, that's hard for everyone, but you can help her better if you don't get so upset by it.  If she's had it for that long, is it in remission?  At some point we have to live with stuff.  Grief and fear for others can't last forever at a high level or we can't go on and are less useful to the person.  Also, calling yourself weak won't help you any.  Maybe a lot of your problem is judging yourself so harshly.  All human beings are pretty useless most of the time, which is why we so celebrate those few successes we have.  That's just life, and judging yourself about it all the time will make you crazy.  I suggest therapy.  Peace.

[Lolololo83]

Thank you for your answer, I have to be strong and more realistic. This is in brief