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Avatar universal

Feel like I have to pee-when I don't

I have developed a problem where when in certain situations-particularly ones where I either can not leave, or would feel rude or uncomfortable leaving (ie: on the bus, in class, in a meeting) I start to feel like I have to pee. It is completely in my head-when I go to the bathroom I don't actually have to pee. I also normally go 4-5 hours without peeing when I don't think of the problem. Ie: I recently went on vacation and not once on the vacation did I have this problem-sometimes we'd be out hiking for 5 hours, I'd be drinking throughout the hike, and still not feel this way.

It has begun to seriously interfere with my life. I feel worried to apply for any job where I may have to attend meetings. I am frightened of going on the bus. I feel uncomfortable throughout my lectures in school and can't concentrate.

I went to see a therapist a while back who told me it sounded like an anxiety disorder. So I started  researching anxiety and started doing daily exersize, breathing techniques, progressive muscle relaxation, etc. It helped IMMENSLY and I thought i was cured.

Now it has started to come back and it is happening in more and more situations. I'm confused because I don't feel stressed or under anxiety-everything else in my life is going well. So I'm reluctant to take medication for anxiety. When I am at home, or when I'm hanging out with my partner, it never happens. If for whatever reason I forget about it-it doesn't happen. But it seems that its become such a problem that as soon as I sit down on the bus, for example, I start thinking about it and worrying about it and I can't stop.

I try to distract myself by reading, calling people from my cell phone, but no matter how hard I try, I can't stop thinking about it.

ANY HELP??????
62 Responses
242912 tn?1402547092
I know exactly how you feel, I have had this problem for many years now.   I am going to assume you've been checked for a UTI (bladder infection) as this is a symptom.  If you've been to the doctor and nothing is wrong then unfortunately this is a common anxiety symptom.  Lot's of people have this problem, in fact, if you read the post a few lines above your original post you'll see the same question with a few responses.  

I don't know your age, but my urologist said a common problem is narrowing of the urethra and there is a procedure to widen it, but I believe this occurs in older people (I"m 48) I didn't have the procedure because it sounded unpleasant and a short while later guess what.....it went away so obviously it's related to anxiety.  It comes and goes.  

I know the fear of going places or being in a situation where it's difficult to get to the bathroom, but the more you worry about it the more you will feel it.  I'm not going to say ignore it because that's difficult to do because it's so uncomfortable, but maybe have peace of mind by the fact that your not going to pee your pants, lol.  Try telling yourself it's just anxiety to get through whatever situation.....think of something else until you can get to a restroom.

I hope this helps a little, you're not alone.

Take care
Avatar universal
I have this exact problem, and it's nice to know that I'm not the only one!  
I'm currently a full-time student at a university, so as you can imagine, it really irritates me.  I have ADHD and thought that it may be caused by me not taking my medication, so I tried taking them and hoped it would help, but it didn't.  I don't ever take the medication due to the fact that it makes me drowsy and irritable, so therefore I move, shake, and wiggle constantly in class, and the peeing issue makes my movements even more rapid.  I'm so distracted by it that during lecture, I only take notes and never actually follow along with the material that my professors are covering.  In one of my classes, the teacher will humiliate any student that gets up to leave by asking them where they're going and how rude it is to leave.  I've noticed that my movements are more violent in that class.
I've tried telling myself that there is no possible way that I could pee myself, but that doesn't help. :(
Avatar universal
Mentioning the UTI part is helpful but stating you've had it for many years is not helpful for those with this problem for it is only putting them down. Today I got rid of this problem myself though I was hesistant about going on meds for it. I wasn't able to sleep, work, or enjoy life at all so I know exactly how all of you feel. If your were also like me you typed "I can't stop thinking about peeing" for a solution but unfortanetely found only people looking for a solution as well.

Well what I did was just stopped worrying about it all together from the source. I brainstormed what I was worrying about really and for me at least it was peeing my pants. I realised that throughout my 2 months dealing with this I never soiled myself and wondered why I worried about it. Realising that I was worried about peeing my pants I just blocked it out of my mind completely and told myself I'm not going to so stop thinking about it, though it may be hard tell yourself it is easy because once you start fighting it it is easy. One thing I always did as well was ask myself if I had to go to the bathroom, don't ask yourself that for your body will tell you when you got to go. Come to the conclusion that you are going to be okay and this will not ruin your life for you can do it just as I did today.
480448 tn?1426952138
Didn't know if you realized....but you've resurrected a pretty old thread...the OP and respondents may not be around anymore.

Also...I didn't see any "putting anyone down"?  I saw very helpful replies....usually the very mention of someone else being "in your shoes" (which is what I believe the one poster was saying) is VERY reassuring.
Avatar universal
For others who followed a search engine here and the op:

I'm a full-time college student and I have this exact same problem. It is increadably stressful, especially long lectures or even more so on the bus! I've had an anxiety disorder for a long time, and I've always been able to deal with it perfectly, but only recently did it manifest itself in the is physical way.

I know how you feel, it is completely humiliating, and absolutely destroys all quality of life. A week ago I was absolutely rock bottom, I've had to take time off college and am honestly worried about dropping out. I lost my apartment and haven't been able to see most of my friends for a while. Fighting it by fixing myself so often to the point where my pants are worn down more at the groin. Worrying about what your peers may be thinking, what the teacher is thinking, how you look, whether or not your going to pee yourself, just biting your cheek or grinding your heels on the chair legs to think of something else as you desperately try not to get up a second time in one class, and the frustration of peeing that small amount having no effect on the urgency.

I'm now on medication, it has honestly helped a bit. It will make the symptoms worse the first week, but after that it is becoming much, much better. I guess short term pain, long term gain. I have no idea how to deal with it by conventional means (meditation, relaxation ect), so I just told them I despised SSRIs ( emotions repressed ), and they gave me another type which has not had these effects.

I'm still dealing with this, but I hope my experience has helped.
1 Comments
I have been dealing with this problem for 4 years[I know this thread is from 2008 but]I would just like to say I have had the same thing-it still hasn't gone away and honestly its ruining my life.Im 16 and its just so hard to do stuff and go out.Im still in highschool and have classes alot.where the teachers will not let you use the bathroom-and if some teachers do -I get nervous that I will keep and keep asking during class.So does anyone have like a website or technique to get over this stupid type of anixety? Please help-thanks if u do.
Avatar universal
wow.. i thought it was just me with this issue! i have NO idea why.. im 24.. when i was younger i used to smoke a lot of weed and used to get this feeling.. i stopped doing that 4 years ago and get this feeling at the worst times! i went about a whole year without getting this feeling and was at my girlfriends parents house and all of a sudden it came back! that feeling where you stop listening to everyone else and start planning an escape in your head, and what happens if i do pee myself.. what do i do? how embarrising!! i tried telling myself, its just in your head, its just in your head! ive tried breathing ive tried everything!!! thought i had it under control, and i was wrong!! i cant even take any pills (tynol, advil, anything) because i find that trigers it!! when i was a kid i used to pee to bed.. until i was like.. 12ish?! i wonder if that has anything to do with it?
242912 tn?1402547092
Hello,

You have somehow stumbled upon a very old thread...16mos old.  Most people won't see this, so if you would like to talk about this problem, you may want to go to the top of the page and post a new question.  Up top, on the left, you will see a green box titled Post a Question.  Posting a new question will bring you to the top of the boards :)
Avatar universal
I have this exact problem. I can go for hours wtuout going, by when I am confronted with a situation where I may not be able to use a toilet such as on a bus or in a school assembly (not even 30 mins long) or car journey or in a cue. It helps to know that in an exam they can't actually stop u from using the toilet but it's still a big worry. I feel that I have to take an empty water bottle with me every where just in case. I don't think there's any physical problem as I'm only 15 but I just hate the thought of school assemblys and exams. I really need a solution. Please help!! :)  
Avatar universal
I too am having this issue, but only when I am in the car and then I start to have a panic attack which then causes me to feel really sick to the point of throwing up and I become afraid that even if I were to throw up I would pee my pants :(

At times I really do have to pee, but most of the time its nothing.
I do frequently have urinary tract infections, which add, but started on a long trip where we got stuck in traffic and the panic attack just kicked in.

I am going to the doctor and urologist this week hopefully I can find some answers
Avatar universal
So I talked to my doctor he said that it might be something called "Honeymoon Cystitis" which is from sexual activity, if you search for infromation on it you should find some helpful tips, like drinking water, urinating after sexual activity to discharge any bacteria, etc.  
358304 tn?1409713092
This is a pretty old thread.... but I'm glad you've figured it out. Anxiety from your panic attacks also give us all the urge to pee all the time. =) I pee more than a racing horse. lol.
Avatar universal
i have the exact same problem and most recently it's been acting up to the point where i will pee at my job and sit at my desk and litteraly want to get right back up and pee again!!!! Has anyone with this issue actually ever peed themselves????? i haven't but i can not explain how frustrating this is to me and I KNOW its purely anxiety and that it's not going to happen but it's just so annoying constantly thinking about it.  I mean it's so hard to tell yourself not to think about it and in doing so, you're actually thinking about it!  i will always try to continue about my life as normal because i feel like avoiding situations will only increase the problem but then i find myself wanting to run to the bathroom everywhere i go and at every chance i get and as im walking to the bathroom, i sometimes feel like i need to run to get there in time.  Riding in cars is the absolute worst!!! although i tell myself that i could litteraly just pull over and go on the side of the road i still get the urges and i wiggle around and feel i can not relax.  sometimes i think that because i am so fed up with it and i just don't care any more and i know i can pee whenever i am actually making it worse because then i want to keep peeing rather than fighting the urges and telling myself i don't need to pee right now.  it hasnt always been this way for me, i did get over it for about a year straight and i felt great! like i was back to normal and then it just started up again.  I know i will probably have to deal with this issue for my whole life, i am 23.  The first time it happened to me i was in class and i was thinking about anxiety, because my sister was battling it severly at the time, and i remember saying to myself "i wonder if "anxiety" could make me pee myself"  i remember thinking about how in movies when people get scared to death they sometimes pee their pants and so i thought i wonder if having "anxiety" could make me pee myself uncontrollably and thats when i had an adrenaline rush and julted to the bathroom only to try to pee and actually couldn't really pee at all.  after that i continued to go to class and push the thought out of my head but i felt like i was battling these thoughts and they slowly got worse.  first it was i couldnt sit through that class then it was class in general then it was car rides then it was work then going out to dinner etc. It just became every situation.  I saw therapists and gave medication a small attempt but it wasn't for me.  It wasnt until i got a job that required me to go on long car rides with strangers everyday that i realized i could beat this! slowly i stopped obsessing and realized i could ride in cars and i could over come the thoughts! i was elated! i left that job and took a job as a camp counselor which was sports activites all day outside.  i was again completely fine, i still thought about peeing and i would just say "if i have to go i can go" and that was the end of it.  i had gotten my life back and i once again felt limitless.  That was a year ago now and i have been working at a boring desk job. i have to stay here for the money and the benefits but it's just hard dealing with the peeing issue because it's back in full-effect and i think it's partially because i can go to the bathroom as much as i want to so i constantly do want to go but then i feel like my boss is going to get mad at me for getting up all the time.   I know i have gotten over it before and i know i have to find a way to get over it again but it's been very hard lately.  i wish that there was a quick fix but im pretty sure that for myself and others with this issue, it's just something you have to get over for yourself.  If anyone else has gotten over this and has made peace with this issue, for the most part, i'd really like to hear about it.  I could use some positive reenforcement right about now!  i mean i look down the line to my future and getting married and i am actually terrified to walk down the isle because i feel like "what if i have to pee and i pee myself at my wedding?".....ugh!!!!! i guess i must continue to keep a positive outlook and to tell myself that i am never going to pee myself and i should stop thinking about it all together because then i will be fine. it is just so hard to do, as i am sure you all know.  i hope all of us will find a way to move past this, i am positive i will someday.  Keep well all, thanks for listening =)
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370181 tn?1428180348
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