I'm not sure everything you're doing is such a bad thing. Everyone should research their meds before taking them, so that part is just prudence. You can learn a lot your doctor doesn't tell you (and often doesn't really know) by doing your homework. Antibiotics, for example, are notorious for being prescribed for things they don't treat and aren't necessary for and they do have some consequences that have to be taken into consideration. On the other hand, when a medication is necessary, you need to take it and need to take it as prescribed. With antibiotics, for example, your doctor usually assumes you're going to do what's recommended, but many people start their course of them and then stop before it's finished, which is not a good thing to do. There's no way for anyone here to know if the particular UTI you have can be treated in some other way or not, they come in many different varieties and there are different ways to treat some of them, but if you have one that needs antibiotics waiting can result in harm. Once you get to the point where you've decided with your doc that medication is the best (and often only) way to proceed, that's the part where you need to put your concerns aside and protect your health. So I'd say you have a two-part situation here, one that is not a bad thing, doing your homework, and one that isn't serving you at all, which is not doing what you need to do for your health. For now, if you need the med, just take it, and for the future, you have a phobia here and therapy for it would probably be a good step for you to take. Peace.
I do 'sort of' get this. More so chronic medications that I'd be on for a long while. But a short term antibiotic to get rid of a painful UTI, oh ya. I'm taking it because I find UTI's excruciating. That's very motivating to me.
There are lots of people that try to muscle through without meds and lots of things can get better on their own without them. But if the health concern is quite uncomfortable (and my UTI's always have been, I can't get relief fast enough!), then it is worth taking it. All medications have side effects but for things like antibiotics, they have a short half life. Which means it washes out of your system pretty quickly. :>)
Do you have health anxiety in general?
CBD oil has helped me! It's very misunderstood due to it being in the cannabis family! THC get's you high, CBD doesn't. It calms the anxiety, depression and sleeplessness.
I agree with Carl! I've had problems with anxiety and the only things that would get me through it is CBD. I vape it but there's loads of ways to use it.