I went to that therapist for 1.5 years and it helped a little, but not much, so I stopped. I should find another.
How many times have you gone? You are free to try another one.
My depression is basically gone since being in a relationship and getting a pet. My anxiety is worse than ever, though, even causing panic attacks. So I searched on Psychology Today's website, which allows you to filter by insurance provider, specialty, etc. It was much better for finding a therapist than my insurance company's website. So I contacted the best matches and started going to one. It hasn't helped much so far. Valerian root helps a lot.
I know it's hard, but you have to start taking baby-steps to turn your life around. I have found when we fear something, the "fear" is the worst part. Once we do whatever we were afraid of, it's not so bad. Leave the past where it is, you can't change it but you can start making changes for your future. There is no reason for you to be this miserable with all the help there is for you. I think you're over-whelming yourself by worrying about all the "what-ifs." One step at a time is how you must think and act. Unless we know someone who knows a therapist they can recommend, we just have to pick one and go for it. It's hard to get up the nerve to do things, but we have to decide that we do want a better life, and must push beyong this fear and take that first step. It will get easier with each step, I promise. Don't worry right now about finding a better job, you're one of the lucky few to still have a job in this economy. Right now concentrate on YOU and getting better. Once you are feeling better and more confident you can start making changes in the rest of your life. On you on medication? Therapy is excellent and will help you, but sometimes we need medication along the way. You may want to see a psychiatrist for a diagnosis, and to discuss if medication would be beneficial for you. I know you can do this, most of us have had to face these things while being terrified, just remember it's the fear that's the worst. You can do this, I know you can. We have a lot of great support here, stay with us for this to help you along the way. You're not alone, we do understand. Make the call and get started at getting your life back, you can do it. It was a big step for you to write us, and you did great, and we're happy you're here! Take care.
I think the best place to start would be with your primary dr. Ask him/her to recommend someone to you and go from there. Try not to be intimidated by calling the therapist. They are trained professionals and they are there to help you.
I know that this is a big step and it sometimes hard to take but just remember that by taking it you are that much closer to feeling better. I really hope you take that step and find someone to help you.
Feel better.....