Teenage daughter weird behavior, anger and anxiety

[JenniferTMS]

My daughter has been acting all moody and angry the past few months. She always hurts her siblings with offensive words and always lets them down. Everytime i talk to her about her being responsible she responds with 'I dont care'and she doesn't take anything seriously and is careless about everything although she does well at school. She is forgettable and not independent at all. I've always talked to her about this but she never listens to me. When we talk sometimes she just blow up and starts shouting at me and acts very stubborn. She always locks herself in her room 24 hours. And as a mother it does hurt me when she mocks at  me and hurts me with her razor-sharp words. And what makes me concerned is when she's very angry she hits herself/pulls her hair/ bangs her head at the door and starts shouting and crying. Then she starts acting mad and starts laughing at nothing. These behaviors makes me very concerned. What is wrong with her? I try very hard to talk to her about this but her response is 'I dont care about others, i care about myself onlyand i do what makes me happy' which sounds a little bit selfish.. Sometimes i think that she might be mentally ill. She always bites her nails, she sweats EXCESSIVELY, are these symptoms should be taken seriously since they are signs of anxiety? Should i take her to a psychologist?

[Paxiled]

You might want to, if she'll cooperate -- but you might also consider taking her to a doctor to check for some odd things that can also go wrong, such as blood sugar, thyroid, and the like.  Think if her energy levels are different.  Is this a big change suddenly, or has she always been a bit like this?  Does she have different friends?  Might she have gotten involved with drugs or a tough crowd?  Is there something in her life that might be bothering her or something in the family dynamics that might be suffocating her?  She could just be going through a rebellious period, but you don't mention her age.  Eventually, every smart kid is going to go through some period where parents become the enemy -- I'm sure you went through something like that at some point, but this behavior sounds abnormal.  You're right to be concerned.

[JenniferTMS]

She is 16. And the aggressive behavior appeared suddenly. She never talks about her feelings/ or what problems she is facing. Forgot to mention that, sometimes she tells me that she wants to be a boy, and she does sometimes wear like a guy and she cuts her hair like so. The way she talks, walks also seems to be like a guy. I did take her to get her blood tested and her male hormones were abnormal. Doctors refused to give her medications since she's young so i have no choice but to accept the way she is. Her friends are good and i do know them and their parents. She sometimes mentions that 'she wants to be on drugs so she could be more creative' but she has no signs that she does takes drugs. She likes aggression, movies with shooting, blood and anger, likes activities that involves fighting and punching. She must have a huge anger inside her and wants to get it out by doing these. But i can't figure out how to talk to her about these, since she refuse to open up .

[Paxiled]

Then I would take her to see a professional.  It sounds like she might be gay and might be having a tough time without telling you about it.  Who knows?  16 is a crazy age to begin with.  But I'd be worried about her aggressive behavior and not talking it out with you.  It might be nothing, but you don't want this to become something chronic if it is something emotional bothering her.  Good luck, this won't be fun!