Misdiagnosed with Anxiety?

[Mercury6m]

Hi, My name's Erik and I'm new here so, hey. Just wanted t'throw that out there.
My question concerns a possible misdiagnosis of anxiety disorder that started when i was 18. (I am 22 years old now.)
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1.   19 years old.
I went to the doctor originally because of a few symptoms that were interfering with my everyday life. These included:
** Lack of Sex Drive** (I found this unusual at the peak of my virility),
** Inability to pay attention to school work or study, or even read anything longer than a magazine article. This had been a problem my whole life despite my high intelligence and placement in the gifted program, and had never once gotten good grades, but it was worse than ever.
** Inability to do many of the creative things that defined who I am , including playing the piano and writing music, painting, photography and writing.
As a result, my doctor diagnosed me with SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER, and prescribed PROZAC which was kind of a shock to me, considering that I had a lot of friends and was Historian of my Senior Class, and was not depressed. I think he just thought that because I wasn't friends with his daughter and said my mother was depressed, but who knows? I'm not a doctor..
Results: No help with the sex drive, no help with art or writing or music, and I stopped taking it after a year. For two more years, the problems persisted. I dropped out of school, and ran away to a city where I didn't know anyone.
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2. 21 years old.
I came back to school, and was ready to start doing something with my life, feeling that I once again was not living up to my potential.
I returned to school, hoping that maybe I had just needed some time off to mature or something. Unfortunately this would not be the case, despite my best efforts. I had an English class which I was very excited about, since it's pretty much the only thing in school I ever did well in as a kid, to the point that i even wanted to write a book. It was a portfolio class, so I could get by in the class without having to turn anything in until the end of the semester, thankfully. But as that date approached, I tried desperately to write to no avail. I would stare at the computer screen and be completely incapable of writing a single coherent sentence. I started to freak out and had a panic attack or two over a period of a couple of months because I was unable to understand why I couldn't -do- anything.
Right before my portfolio was due (20+ pages of writing), a friend suggested that I take some adderall. I had never taken anything like that before and obviously did not have a prescription, so I was cautious. But at the risk of failing out of school (again) I tried a pill one evening. Amazingly, I wrote the entire portfolio that night and went to bed.  The semester was over and I was able to enjoy my summer commitment-free. Of course, I would have liked to work on my music or art, but I still was unable to maintain my attention.
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3. going on 22.
The summer had ended and I dreaded going back to school, despite the fact that I really wanted to graduate. I'm probably the smartest kid in my family, and my parents both have masters' degrees, so I was really wanting to get it out of the way. I went to my new doctor (my old one only sees children now) and explained to him my problems concentrating on school and my creative endeavours. He replied that concentration problems can be caused by GENERALIZED ANXIETY DISORDER. I was a little surprised again, because I didn't feel any anxiety that was just random, generally. But I was willing to do what it took to get my life back.
He prescribed me EFFEXOR XR and gave me 20 XANAX.
***RESULTS***
After a couple of weeks, I began sleeping upwards of 13 or 14 hours per night, and began missing most of my classes because of it. My roommate would attempt to wake me up, but I would apparently say all sorts of crazy **** to him and fall back asleep, never remembering the events. Despite really wanting to do well in school, I was doing worse. As a result of missing class and other things, I began having panic attacks, with increasing regularity. While I'd had some once in a while before, there was always a good reason, and I felt this was normal for anyone. This was different. I was having upwards of 3 ANXIETY ATTACKS PER DAY, and thought I was going to die of a heart attack for sure.  The XANAX would help if i had one, but nothing seemed to help the problems I had before that with concentration, and of course, I can live with a panic attack once every 2 months unmedicated. But there's no way I could deal with 3 a day on EFFEXOR, and failing out of school, and STILL being unable to play piano or write or read or draw.
So I stopped taking it cold turkey for fear of my educational career, which started a whole new host of problems. Pretty much the same stuff persisted, plus weird electrical sensations that never went away, to the point that I felt like bugs were crawling all over my body. I became really depressed for the first time in my life because I felt like I was wasting a whole lot of money on school I really wanted to complete, and was a shell of my former self
I went back to the doctor a month later
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22. WELLBUTRIN
Since EFFEXOR worked out so horribly (I'd say it was the worst period of my life) and had left me with so many residual problems (the crawling bug feeling, severe drowsiness, anxiety attacks, usw.) he decided that he should switch me to a new medicine. He suggested WELLBUTRIN SR, which I am still taking now. It got rid of the withdrawal symptoms I had before from EFFEXOR, and I feel somewhat like I did before the whole thing started. I am still not able to concentrate on any acceptable level, play music, write, or study. My libido is still limited to short, unfulfilling masturbation, which my doctor said this medicine would restore (it's been 2 years since I had any fulfilling sex). Basically everything is back at square one. I would say the peak of my attention span is right after i take the WELLBUTRIN (like right now).. but it's only a marginal difference from what I was capable of before this whole fiasco began.
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SO. After talking to my brother, who has both ADHD and BIPOLAR DISORDER, and my sister, who has ADHD, I began to question this diagnosis. I'm not hyperactive, that much is true. In fact, I played sports for most of my childhood because my father made me, but i was exceedingly bad at all of them in light of my physical abilities, and all of the kids hated me having me on their teams. But my brother told me that there is a kind of ADD that doesn't have hyperactivity, and that it could even make one sluggish. After reading the symptoms, I really feel like this might be what I have, but I can't find almost any information about this. And I feel like I can't tell my doctor how much Adderall helped me that one night because I didn't have a prescription. I'm not just looking for drugs, believe me. I just wanna cry sometimes when I think about all the things I've wanted to do with my life that I can't, but I can't cry. None of my friends seem to believe me, saying I'm just lazy and whatnot, which is really disheartening.

Has anyone had a similar experience? Any advice? I'm desperate at this point, I feel my life is kind of wasting away bit by bit.

[lonewolf07]

Hi

My experience has been that there is an unwritten mandate among drs, particularly psychiatrists, psychologists, etc. to label everything.   I grew up believing that everything is interconnected - mind, body, emotions and spirit.  It is quite possible that some of the disorders you mentioned are overlapping and every dr is giving your problem a new name and label.  What do YOU think it is?  This posting is about you but I can tell you that many of the things you experience I have also experienced.  It could be that your mind is overstimulated in the academic setting.  I've seen a lot of students fall apart when they get into the "higher learning" situation but that does not mean you will.  Stress causes a lot of strange things to happen to our minds and bodies.

About your sex drive - in my opinion, Nature will take care of that if you listen to her.   I am not trying to be facetious or trivialize your problems.  Sometimes the answers are in our own spirits if we just take the time to listen.

lonewolf

[JSGeare]

Easy to see why you are the class historian.

It is tempting -nearly compelling- given the comprehensive scope and detailed coverage of your history, to chase down each little thing and pigeon-hole it in some neat organizational scheme that explains everything and yields not one clue about what to do. And I find an equal and opposite desire to sit here in a drop-jawed stupor as might a monkey contemplating Fermat's theorem.

So, instead of all that, I'll just go to my "jump list," that is, the material that jumps out at me.

1. MIS diagnosis?  All the diagnoses are "mis" in one way or another; they are, after all, just the names given to observations and conclusions. Quite often in mental health matters, there are primary and secondary and even tertiary diagnoses -and quite often, the more one looks, the more they are changed. The whole idea is to find something to test for and treat -and bill for. One of my doctors said I had "contact dermititis," the other said, "poison ivy." So what? The point is, is the treatment working? Is the diagnosis "close enough" to get us where we want to be? Consequently, your hunt for the right label may be both interesting and of little practical value.

2. I think I would diagnose you as "high functioning," and probably way above your peers. You are one smart guy. This isn't the best wake-up call you'll ever have, but frequently it is the intelligent ones who have anxiety. Then again, we are well-equipped to deal with it.

3. When you mentioned running away to another city, the first question that jumped into my mind was: "Where are the parents in all this?" And the answer soon came. Sure enough, they seem to be high-function folks, too, so at least we have some indication of an incipient influence on you. I guessed that your inter-actions with them (and vice-versa)may have played a part in your departure and also played a part in many of the circumstances leading to the mental challenges you have been facing.

4. And sure enough, there IS an indication that relationships with the parents had something to do with the obstacles you've been struggling with: "I played sports for most of my childhood because my father made me." And all the sordid mess that came out of THAT. Trust me, I can identify with the curious parental idea that merely inserting a kid into a particular environment will produce, in vending machine fashion, the desired well-rounded kid. Get a copy of Dave Cohen's "Stranger in the Nest," read it yourself, then slip it under Dad's pillow one night. I trust that the mere mention of this book will stimulate you to go scan the synopses and reviews at Amazon.

5. Drugs, drugs, drugs! So where in the name of all that is in synchronus harmony in the universe, is THERAPY? Given that you present as my "double," or perhaps my age-regressed doppleganger, I'm telling you that if you can do the emotional archaeology and understand how you got to be the way you are, the horizon will be considerably brighter. This is a trip you take with a psychiatrist, who acts as a sort of guide who has no more clue of the answers than do you -but is a skilled guide who "knows the territory," and is a good tracker. You NOT ONLY unhand yourself of burdens and mental blocs, you get one helluva lot better at whatever you want to do and on top of that, have peace of mind. And few or maybe NO medications (for that, anyway).

5. And finally, the one thing that was conspicuous by its absence, in somehwat the same way as waking up without your feet would be, is anger. Wassup with that? You don't have to tell ME; your psychiatric guide will help you with that one.

Now then, it took me about 40 years before I did what I'm telling YOU to consider. Maybe I'm wrong. Happens all the time. But if I AM wrong, then let's find out now so we can dismiss my ideas about what might help and try something else. But if I'm RIGHT (or close enough) then you want to spare yourself another 20 years or so of messing with this -so get on it.

You don't care about the diagnosis -you care about feeling well and happy, same as the rest of us. So get to work on it.

And STAY with us -what happens with you will be information and inspiration to many, many others. And there's no way I can be wrong about THAT.

[scarlette23]

I actually think I'm in the same boat you are. I've had similar issues all my life. At 16 I was diagnosed with Anxiety, which I've accepted up to this point. I could go into all the symptoms, but they are a lot of symptoms that fit better with ADD (adult) than anxiety. I can't maintain... I can't function... and that sucks. I'm 23 now and I've been treated with everything for anxiety- antidepressants which put me into seratonin syndrome which means I have too much seratonin. Seratonin is usually what is effected by anxiety, so that was clue #1... Because I can't take the antidepressants, my doc currently has me on klonopin. I hate it. It make me even more forgetful and sleepy than I already am! Clue #2: If I really had anxiety, the klonopins would be effective.

Also like you, I borrowed an Adderall from a friend of mine and bingo. It worked like magic. I think I've diagnosed myself as having add... not anxiety. The add med. made me feel like a normal, functioning individual. I know that if it became my regular treatment (i'm talking to the doc tomorrow) I could live to my full potential.