I've been trying to cope with incredibly anxious thoughts since my mother passed away suddenly over a month ago. I started out on Ativan, but decided I wanted to try something I would take every day to help level me out so my doctor gave me Celexa.
Long story short, I've become incredibly anxious and nervous about my health, even though I'm a healthy 19 year old female with no prior medical conditions. I honestly forget that constantly with the way that I think now.
I go through different "health issues" that I think I have - recently I began thinking I had insomnia and it scared me to think I wouldn't be sleeping enough. It doesn't worry me that much anymore - I have nights where I sleep only waking up once and I have others where I wake up a few times, become anxious and have trouble falling back to sleep. But it's starting to pass just like all of my other "issues". I just accept it.
I recently spent over a week with my boyfriend in a beach house which I was very excited for. I was anxious in the beginning about the whole sleeping thing, but it eventually subsided and I managed to feel incredibly good and happy for the first time in what felt like forever.
I came home the other day, and since then, I've been having what I'm hoping is just a new wave of anxiety symptoms.
The night I got home from his house, I felt fine and I slept through the night. However, I woke up the next day feeling like a mess. I had a headache for what seemed to be the entire day and I just felt completely drained of energy. I noticed my hands were shaking and I began to have muscle twitches. My anxiety came back full force. I started to stress about everything. I should mention that I was so stressed I didn't eat until dinner, which didn't help at all. When I ate, my headache subsided as well as some of my muscle twitches and the shaking.
I went to bed, woke up a few times and fully woke up around 8 feeling overwhelmingly alone. I don't have a headache today and the twitching has subsided significantly but I still am shaking in my hands.
I should mention something; the day I went home I had taken a long walk with my boyfriend for the first time in a long time. My legs were very sore, so I figured the muscle twitches were from that - however they happen almost everywhere on my body. My legs just feel weak which I assume is a combination from not eating or drinking correctly which I was doing while I was with my boyfriend.
I also started taking 20 mg of Celexa over the weekend - before I was taking only 10 and had been for a little over a week. I'm not taking the Ativan anymore on a regular basis - I still have it for any sort of anxiety I can't calm myself out of. I'm also taking Aviane - a generic birth control.
Basically, I'm just looking for some reassurance. None of this started happening until I was away from my boyfriend whom I feel the most comfortable and safe around.
I'm incredibly conflicted by my anxiety - I know I need to tough through it but I miss feeling like myself and the only time I truly feel like myself again is with my boyfriend or if I'm with someone else for the day. I would love to just live with him but I have three younger siblings and my dad works five days a week from 9 until 6 or so.
If anyone has any sort of advice I would be very appreciative.