Thank you for your feedback.
I did convince her he has problems.She got him to do a internet test for "depression" and he passed with flying colours!!! Almost all symptoms were relevant to him.
He has now asked for a seperation (need to be seperated for a period before you can divorce in UK).
Hopefully the mood swings will swing in the right directions at the right time so they can get sorted.
I am really sorry that he does not want anybody's help but the safety of my daughter and grandson are my main concern.
Once again thank you.
This sounds like OCD but only a professional could diagnose this, and he may have other issues as well. It sounds like a volatile situation, and he definitely needs help. Can you convince your daughter that there is a serious problem and she and her son may be in danger? There is so much help for him, and no need for your daughter and grandson to have to live like this. If she can be convinced there is a problem, then maybe she can convince him to get help. But at the same time you say his mood changes quickly so I would fear for her safety when suggesting he get help. If you feel this is a dangerous situation, normally you could have an intervention and his wife could have him hospitalized to ensure everyone's safety and to get him the proper help. I don't know how things work in the UK, but somehow this man needs professional help. Try talking to your daughter and go from there, hopefully she can convince him to get help, it has to be his decision. I don't know how dangerous the situation is, but if you are fearing for your daughter and grandson's safety, you may want to get the proper authorities involved. Good luck with this and take care.