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advice on how to manage my anxiety....

Hi everyone!!! I haven't been on MedHelp in quite a while, but I know that it has helped me in the past overcome issues so I'm back once again for something else. I'm just wanting some advice on how to manage my anxiety or panic attacks better. any advice would be greatly appreciated :)  I've had anxiety issues aka panic attacks off && on since 2005. The first time that I had one I was at the party at the school after graduation that they call Project Grad. It didn't last but maybe a few seconds, but I felt really light headed & like I was going to die, I spaced out && everything. Luckily that was my first one for quite a while. I met a guy after graduating before I was supposed to go away to college. I ended up changing my mind && said I'd go to school later. We were together beginning of 2006 off && on until the beg. of this year. It has been a rocky roller coaster of a relationship. I got pregnant in 2007 with our son Jackson who is now 4 years old. My son's father left me at his dad's house 7 months pregnant to be with someone else so I ended up moving back home with my parents who lived 2 hrs away. It was supposed to be just my weekend to see them before I had Jackson, but it turned into me moving home. My ex abused me both physically && emotionally. Talked down to me a lot so my self-confidence && self-esteem isn't too great. He's hit me, pushed me, almost fractured a finger, choked me(once where he literally took my breath away for a few seconds). I've raised our son since the beginning with very little help from him...mainly have the support of family && friends. He comes && goes when it's convenient for him but it never seems to be when he is really needed or on a regular basis. I miscarried twice a few months apart back in 2009. I found out for quite a while my ex had cheated on me && the last time he did was a few days after I miscarried for the second time && it was with my best friend of almost 11 years...it's hard to get past a lot of things because I've been treated so badly by a lot of people. I thought for the longest time that I deserved what was happening but I know better than that now. Every time my ex tries to come back around it seems like my anxiety gets worse, then once I get used to being without him && not having him around I can deal with everyday life no problem. I am not very close with my dad or younger brother so my son && I moved from living with them to live with my mom && her fiance. There is less stress here, but my anxiety still feels like it's at an all time high. It has gotten to the point where I hardly leave the house unless I really have to. I leave && just want to come right back home...I dunno if it's because I don't feel safe or what it is. I do get them sometimes at home but not very often. I have gotten so I guess panicky that I've almost passed out a few times. I am currently on medication, but I don't feel it's been helping. I don't have insurance && have been on this medicine for almost a year. I do have an appt on the 18th to see a doctor who specializes in anxiety, depression, etc. I want to figure out what I can do to manage my anxiety better. I miss going out with friends && family in town, taking my son places, shopping, && just enjoying the outdoors. I feel like I'm stuck in the house all the time. It's not fun && I want to get past this somehow. Also, I've had trouble sleeping for a few months where I get up every couple hours, may stay up for a while or try to turn over && go back to sleep, then I'm up again a few hours later. I'm taking less of my medication now that I am running low && I noticed that with taking half the dose I normally do that I feel more awake during the day rather than sleepy && I slept completely through the night last night....any advice/support would be great!!!! thank you :)
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Avatar universal
I was in your same position, i had my first daughter when i was 16yrs old and my first panic attack when i was 18yrs old. With being young i didnt read into my anxiety until i was about 21, i am 26 now. There was a short time window when i got my life back, i was able to go out and have a few drinks and not freak out because i felt my heart beating fast. I then have had two more kids, my husband and i had some financial down falls and had to move back in with my inlaws where my panic attacks were triggered again. That was 2 yrs ago and i am back to square one. I have good and bad times, but am still coping with anxiety on a daily basis. I have just started going to a gym again on a daily routine and i am hoping it helps with my stress, I am sorry you are going through so much but you just have to find what works best for you, whether its medication, excersise, therapy etc. Find your serenity and know that there is nothing anxiety can do to you, you control it! If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to message me on here. You are not alone.
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