I am trying really hard not to drink lately, yet my boyfriend keeps showing up (just to say hi, hang out after work) - you see, I'm stuck at my parents house at age 34 - there are no jobs around here, vene though I apply on almost a daily basis. I'm obviuosly on the comptuer now, but don't feel good, naseous, a bit of anxiety - from shakiness, not drinking a few beers. My body's so used to it.
As far as the valium, I have that for other reasons and rarley use it, but they do use valium for alcohol withdrawl. I try not to combine and take .5mg, not the full .10.
Anyway, I'm so sick of feeling like this and told my boyfriend I'm not drinking this whole week, but yet, he still came over with an 18 pk. Since I met him, I've been drinking more than I ever had before and gained 40+lbs, my face has extra weight on it, like I'm frowning, my eyes are droopy, and I'm always tired and bored, I have back pain and vericose veins are starting to hurt even though they are small - on the sides by my knees - and I contribute all of this to sitting in that damn truck drinking 8-9 beers a night never moving from that seat in the truck til maybe 2am., So, from 5-6pm til 2am, that's 9 hours sitting in the truck daily. WTF, seriously. Never in my life would I have thougth this. When I say "lets freakin go do something and get out of this truck!" he's like, "do what? I'm tired from work - he does flooring all day in San DIego - and blah, blah, blalh..." I can't take it anymore. NOw, not only do I have back pains (from sitting on my *** so many hours a day), I have neck apins, allosrts of pains really, am sad, depressed, lonely, think he'll blow up if I stop drinking - when I don't have abeer he thinks "something's wrong" and stares out the window not looking at me like he shouldn't be at my house and I don't want him there. Well, I do want him to be with me, but not freaking drinking - really, there's not many times when I can think of him withOUT a beer in his hand - and he always repeats himself and the conversations go nowhere, and repeat. It's boring and damaging.
Sorry for typo's - typing fast.. Carol
Thanks for the write back!
Ya, I just know that ever since I drank a lot, I started with panic attacks - they HAVE to associated, at least for me. I never had them before drinking so much beer. What are your panic attaks like exactly and I'll describe mine to you to see if they are similar.
I went to a doctor years ago, he said I was a 6/10 on the panic scale, but I know this has increased evne more recently, when NOT drinking..
How did I get to the "Agoraphobia" page? I am not "Agoraphobiaic" - I appreciate the support and would like to continue our conversations, but am I in the right section?? I was looking more for alcohol abuse, but mainly anxiety ...... I guess..
Hi, Thanks for your reply. I replied to the previous person, I don't know if you can view that message...?!?!??? Yes, alcohol = aniety for me... at least the day(s) after. I tremble inside. My hands used to shake, that was bad enough, but the trembling scares me so bad. It's like a rumbling around my heart, and this is just from beer. I fi stop drinking, the "tremors" stop. I don't know if they are officially called tremors, but that is exactly what they feeel like, small earthquake inside. Then I could get vertigo on occassion, few times a year, super bad like I'm going to pass out. I've been to the ER thinking I had a heart attack, when they did a EKG, my heart was fine, but I had a severe panic attack that cost me over $3000 in the end.
Maybe you should try an anti-depressant? I don't know, maybe yuo have already?? Did they help?? Exercise does wonders and boosts your natural anti-depressant, your endorphins. Maybe join an exercise group - it's hard at first, espessilaly when your alone, like me. I dropped all my "bad" friends. It's just me & my boyfriend now. And I'm back living with my parents, who despise me being here, because of the terrible economy and being able to get a job, even a basic one with no skills needed - there are just simply no jobs out there. I hate being a burden to them, but I hope I get some customers for my new business real soon and bring in some "Doh"!!
Thanks for the replies! This site is cool.. didn't think anyone would even respond, but so far you and 1 other!
Yes, I will not plan on taking anti-depressants. I contrbute the depression to ont feeling good becasue of hangovers, though mild, almost daily. The thing is - my boyfriend of 3+ yrs. can drink like a fish "bud-light only" - no hard either. And he always wants a few after work which will malnly = 18pk/2 = 9 beers each (basically). Since I met him I have gained 30+ lbs. So ridiculous, but the weight agin also is due to my being at home most of the time becasue I cannot find a job. I will, however, and am taking this opportunity to get my AA in Bus. Administration & Mgmt. and will hopefully graduatet his Fall! I started my own business involving Animal Care last week also. So far no customers, but I am not new to this field.
My anxiety today is non-exsistant because I did not have anything the last 2 days, but I can't sleep, it's 206am. Last night it was 430am when I last saw the clock. So this part sux. Also I am on a mission to exercise each day with helps increase your natural endorphins and makes you feel more confident anyway, and stronger.
My anxiety, I am convinced, is due to beer and no job= no social interaction, except my boyfriend who is extremely loving and caring and a great listener/ talker & handsome, but drinks too much. He says he wants to stop, we are in the beginning stages of that - at least during the week. I will still have beers on the weekends though, not so much.
I take 0.5 valium at night, it does not seem to affect me however. Still wide awake...
Ok I have alot of knowledge in this area. Even though I had my first panic attack (at 22) before I picked up my first drink (at 30) When I first started drinking I found it to be my magic elixir for anxiety but after 5 years of drinking it became my biggest enemy for my anxiety. Drinking on a daily basis your body is going through hell to get the toxins out of the body, you just become very susceptible to anxiety. Also you have to be very careful about combining benzos, which Valium is with alcohol.
they both depress your CNS. Also alcohol is a major offender for depression and weight gain. I would really look at the drinking first, then work on the other issues after, if they are still there. Even though my profile says I have been sober for a year, that is because I had a relapse, I was sober for 6 years before that. Even though when I was sober I still had anxiety, when I am drinking it is 10 times worse you can see that from my journal entries, all of them were written during my relapse, Please contact me if you want help with the drinking. It really is hard to stop drinking when you are depressed. I never suffered from depression until the end days of my drinking
All sounds good. And you are most welcome for the response. You aren't agoraphobic, but glad I responded. My niece is in similar boat right now. Needs job: having no money for the small things she wants is really stressing her out. In her case, her husband and she are not in the best place, but he did just get a job with benes....huge! She'd be happy with a part time position. Like you, she really needs the stimulation of working...as well as the money she can call her own.
Clonazapam works for me...so glad valium is good for you. Frankly, in my non medical opinion, don't get started on antidepressants unless it is clear that you are too depressed to get out of bed or feel like giving up on life.
Know they work very well for many.....sure didn't for me. Caused more health problems than they solved. I've just taken off 30 lbs; skin is clearing up; blood work and pressure back to normal. The pills are only 1/3 of the solution anyway...most is up to us.
Glad you have the horses. They will give you comfort and exercise. Wish their scent could be bottled:). Good luck.
Thank you for your response, however I was never diagnosed with agoraphobia. I looked it up, and it does not seem to fit me. I really beleive beer is the main problem and not having a normal job which would get me out of the house, allow me to buy things I want, talk with people daily, and get good sleep at night. I eat healthy, but I hardly exercise except treadmill/ videos. I just started a business with animal care so hope that takes off too.
Why the phyciatrist for me?
Yes, I ride the horses and spend plenty of time out there with them, love my animals!!
As far as medication, valium has been the best for me, calming me down & helps wean you off alcohol although I am normally fine if I just don't drink for a few days. My doctor had also given me Lexapro, but it made my head feel "hot" and I had trouble communicating and getting my thoughts across on it. I tryed some other pill as well, but it did the same thing pretty much. And they made me have trouble swallowing I think I remember.. so those are not for me obviously..
Thanks for your responses!!
Should have checked this post first! Relate to gaining weight. I put on a bunch after retirement! And became housebound (sedentary) following anal cancer treatment.
I had to take things a baby step @ a time. Got lots of support in this forum.
It is still a struggle, but most days I can get somewhere to chat or at least watch people. My weight control process started with my first trip to the grocery store. I've lost about 20 lbs because of a shift from the fast foods I craved to fruit and veggies. The usual formula. It is very hot here in Florida so walking which is next on my list will have to be early or late.
For about two years, I lived on junk or food brought to me by my sister and her husband.
Like you, I was a very active person before retirement and cancer. My weight ballooned from 115 to about 160 in a year: an antidepressant caused much the weight gain, but my life style sure didn't help...LOL.
Here is what I think. You may be self conscious now about your appearance. I sure as h*** was! In addition to the weight gain, I developed a severe adult acne problem. Am getting that under control with the weight. The firsts are the hardest. After your first few forays into the world outside your place, think you will be easier about things.
BTW: I learned that I was the only one who really cared about the weight gain: got used to not being recognized...etc. :). I was a huge comfort food junkie. It was like a sedative/antidepressant to eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches @ night, or run to 7-11 for a sandwich and soda.
You are not able to drive because of agoraphobia? I don't know of a medication that will calm your anxiety and help with weight loss. Wouldn't that be a miracle pill!!! We'd all be clamoring for it I'm sure.
Without a knowledge of your medical history it is hard for me to comment on meds. Do you see a psychiatrist? This would be my 1st recommendation. If you can't drive to an office, see if there are any who will call or even come out. We did hear of a social worker visiting a homebound person who posted here.
Know you want to be the active person you once were. I'm moving toward that goal, slowly but surely! Believe you can do the same. Most of us take a med as 1/3 of the answer, a base; the other 2/3s of getting out and about is up to us.
Understand your liking to have a beer throughout your day. I don't need to tell you it is not the answer. This habit is a common one, and won't get you out. You don't want to drink and drive for sure.
It would be neat to have horses. Do you ride? Just walking them is exercise and might take your mind off your troubles. We talk a lot about distraction as a tool to control panic. It seems to me the horses could be a start.
Therapy is what I suggest to assist you with your life issues. My son was murdered a few months ago by my former husband. I couldn't have gotten through that ordeal without seeing a therapist.
Being without a job is tough, when you've been independent. But it isn't forever. Believe that. Therapists can help with the loss you feel and the attendant behaviors.
Let us know what you decide. We are a good group. Here 24/7.