I have written on here on a few occassions about different health fears/scares. I have been suffering with health anxiety for a long time now. I have gotten through the years without medication/antidepressants up until four years ago when I started taking 10mg of lexipro. I was very reluctant to take it because I was afraid that I might get some side effects. or in my case have a rare allergic reaction.
I worry about my health and I am tired of it. Tired of thinking the worst about every situation. I get a symptom and immediately think the worst, even if i am not sure it is something serious I go out of my way to make sure that it is NOT something serious. I go online looking to make sure that I am okay and I get nowhere.
I have felt lumps on my breast (once under my armpit) I have obsessed over skin discoloration, back pains, heachaches, rectal bleeding, mouth sores(oral cancer), sore teeth ,neck pain, heart palpitations, and the list goes on and on. I immediately go to the doctor when I have a symptom that I believe is serious. If I have a fever I automatically think I have swine flu or a serious infection. When I get a routine pap tests or mammogram I worry for days that the phone will ring and I will get some terrible news from a nice nurse. I recently had rectal bleeding and I skipped a menstral cycle. I panicked right away thinking I had endometriosis. where the period blood could break through to the rectum. I got a colonoscopy and was told I had bleeding hemmoroids and that the missed period could be perimenapause. I had all the blood work done and everything was fine.
I am 45 years old now and I know that getting older will bring on some real illness' So now I worry about that. My latest obsession is whether or not to increase my meds to 20mg. My family doctor says it will help. But right away I go back to the rare allergic reactions that I might get Or that by raising the dosage I will get the same side effects that people get when they first start meds. I started taking lexipro at 5mg.(four years ago) I took it and about six hours after I woke up with a burning chest pain in the middle of the night. I thought I was having a heart attack. My doctor assured me that the pain was from anxiety and not from the lexipro. It went away once I sat up and walked around) I have been fine on the 10mg since then. I beleive the meds help me in other ways example I am no longer edgy or anxious while sitting in a room full of people, I can travel more, etc. However when it comes to this health anxiety, I am not even sure 20 mg of lexipro will help me.
I just wanta cry. I think this is so sad and I know other people suffer with it too. Please anyone who can relate . I would love to talk to others who may have suggestions or advise or who just need support like me.