uncontrollable horrific mental images, chronic twitching, head banging

[j31598]

Hello- my husband suffered a horrible childhood of mental and sexual abuse. He suffers from a WIDE array of psychological and physical health problems now, which he believes are all a result of this trauma. Everything from uncontrollable racing HORRIFIC mental images which result in severe neck twitching/jerking which leads to chronic headaches and neck pain, head banging in sleep, nightmares, depression, anger, thoughts of suicide, self-esteem/self-hate issues, constant hair twirling, extremely painful digestive and going to the bathroom problems.. These are all on a DAILY basis. He seems to be constantly in pain and tries so hard to hide it. He tries to be positive but he hurts so much. As we go to sleep he tells me images he sees in his head and it blows my mind. They are racing, extremely disturbing images and when this happens his head jerks to one side, sometimes as much as 30 times a minute. This did NOT happen when we first met, probably because he wasn't as comfortable around me as he is now. He apologizes profusely for keeping me awake and I know he can't help it.  When we go for counseling they tell him to exercise and keep a journal. We have been to MANY "shrinks" and none have told us anything we didn't already know. He does not want to take prescriptions for every single one he's taken creates new problems(side-effects), often worse than his original symptoms. I am so sad and scared for him. What can I do? I constantly remind him how much I love him and we are SO close to each other. This seems to do nothing, however. The more stress and anxiety, the worse these problems get.

[calmshell]

hi...that does sound frustrating and frightening for you and especially him... i have had anxiety
about thoughts usually...monitoring if i'm thinking something "bad" about something or someone frequently..it used to control me more, but i had mentioned this to another member on this site..this book i read by Dr. Robert Leahy..a leading psychologist on anxiety..i learned that thoughts...(or images ) can Never control you...you have to realize that it is your subconscious playing out possibly an old script from childhood, of in essence, fear (which most of us learned quite a few fears growing up that you need to test out, and see they are not true, just holding us back) Its the thought that any image or thought ITSELF can control us that gives the fear....
The book was really helpful to me and I think could maybe help out your husband too...a book i had read which really helps out w/self esteem was A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle, which i actually mentioned as well to someone else here....talks of how your thoughts do not matter, you appearance, social status, possessions, etc...likes, dislikes, etc..do  not essentially matter..they are all part of your mind trying to constantly BE something and compare itself to others, when we already ARE everything by just simply being....it is VERY simple, nothing you could ever DO or SAY about anyone or yourself is your true self (appearance, event, money, background) and I really really started to see that its so true what he says throughout all of the book..hope any of this helps a bit....

[rghbog]

Maybe read melody beatties Codependant no more. for yourself. He has to decide to do something and you may need to get yourself a life.

[rghbog]

There are several meds not all of them work but alot do work. It is tough going thru med changes untill you find the right one. Also meetings are important like alanon (for people who grew up in dysfuctionl homes or spouses of alcoholics. Well there is a solution but a person has to be willing.

[anxiousallie4]

Hi, I have a similar problem, I am having counselling for PTSD, Depression and Anxiety. It all working quite well and most of my symtoms are improving but I too can not get rid of the horrific images that come into my head no matter what I do and it just keeps making me cry all the time. I really don't know what to do anymore :(
I am sorry to hear about your husband and see that you posted this comment quite some time ago, how is he doing?

[ILADVOCATE]

Yes I had similar things happen to me as a child though not nearly as bad but it did scar me mentally. But you are describing two things. The first sounds like ptsd and the second could be a neurological disability such as epilepsy if it involves random involuntarily motion. It would be best for him to go to a support group if he doesn't want to take medication. Because then if the other people in the support group for what he is coping with explain to him how medication helped them coming from them it might seem different and make sense to him. Take it slowly with the recovery issue as admitting to help is traumatic in itself as part of it involves reliving the past mentally but it seems as if a consult with a neurologist would be warranted as well.