Avatar universal

HELP!!! What is going on with my 3-year old??

My husband and I are having the hardest time with my 3-year old son (7-3-2006.)  Since he was young, he has been a handful,but this being our first, we just thought he was being a normal "boy."  However something in my heart, is telling me something more is going on. First I thought ADD/ADHD (he's VERY active and rarely sits still any length of time) but now Asperger's has crossed my mind.  Here are some of his typical behaviors.
*Started banging head against crib at 1-year - continues to do it in his carseat and against pillow before falling asleep
*Only watches TV while rocking in chair
*Doesn't listen to anyone
*Picky eater! refuses to try anything new. Only eats rotation of 5-6 items!
*Has outbursts/tantrums when things don't go his way.destroys surroundings, hit, scream, spit, throw
* Shopping can be a nightmare. Again with the hitting, screaming
* Littlest things set him off! Ex: wrong color popsicle, pizza slice isn't a perfect triangle, suckers are not round
* Frustrates easily.  If he isn't able to complete a task (ex. puzzle) he will throw the entire piece across the room and give up.
* Once he is upset, it easily snowballs!! Doesn't seem to calm himself down.

My husband and I have tried different discipline techniques, but none seem to do the trick.  I spoke to our peditrician about his behavior a few months back (after his former preschool stated that "he was the worse they had ever seen??") and referred us to a phycologist. stopped going because I just didn't feel it was where he needed to be (maybe I just need a better fit with a different one?)

Anyway, do you think something is going on, or am I just oversensitive about it? His former teachers and also his current ones have both expressed concern over some "sensory issues" they have seen (I'm not sure what they mean by this? Does this mean he doesn't liked to be touched or touch new things...because that doens't seem to be an issue at home.) He is VERY smart, way pass his age group.
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340636 tn?1321629051
First of all, you are quite right to have concerns about your son’s behavior.  Speaking to your pediatrician was exactly the first thing I always recommend when parents have any question regarding their child’s development.  In your case, it sounds like it wasn’t all that helpful.  Although referring you to a psychologist wasn’t necessarily a bad option, it sounds as though referral for further diagnostic assessment may have been a better choice.  I recommend that you go back to your pediatrician and ask for a full development assessment by a team familiar young children and developmental disabilities, including autism spectrum disorders (ASDs).  Although you didn’t describe your son’s communication behavior, given that you said he is very smart, I assume he is verbal, and communicating at age level.  The other behaviors you describe might be indicative of a number of developmental problems and here again, a team evaluation would be helpful.  As far as methods to help your son behave more appropriately, I suggest that you may wish to ask the pediatrician for a referral to a Board Certified Behavior Analyst to help you with the problem.  (You can go to the Behavior Analyst Certification Board’s website (http://www.bacb.com/) to see if there is one near where you live; or at least to see what types of qualifications you should be looking for in someone to help you.)  As with the above recommendation regarding finding an assessment team with experience with young children with ASD, so should anyone you speak with to help you with your son’s behavior (based on your description of the behavior).  I have also provided a few web addresses of sites about the symptoms of ASD that you might find helpful in looking at aspects of your son’s behavior.  

About.com Pediatrics
American Academy of Pediatrics
First Signs
Helpful - 0
944787 tn?1287084773
this sounds like my little girl. shes 3 1/2 (28/08/2006) she does all the things your little man does too.....
she talks but she mumbles and talks though her nose.
only with the touching with her its opposite she wont stop touching everything and anything i cant leave her to go to the toilet without coming back to her ripping things up or the room in a big mess.
she also ***** her fingers non stop and i had trouble getting rid of her soother.
i am having her assessed very soon on the 15th July for add, adhd, autism and sensory problems.
i cant find any way of discipline that lasts for more than 24 hrs and its horrible no one wants to play with her for fear of her striking out or crying over game play.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
i have a three year old as well, but doesn't have behavior like yours. My three year old daughter is quite calm, listen to suggestions and criticisms but cannot speak fluently.  This is my concern... does your three year old kid can talk fluently?  :-(  
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