Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
574118 tn?1305135284

2 modes of operation

Hi

I posted this question in another forum, but would like to hear your views as this forum I reckon is more specialized.

I am in a rather perplexing situation. I don't know whether i am asking this question because I "became" bipolar or it is common for people to ask it.



It seems I was finally accepted for a post. Now there are 2 alternatives: Either I try to work hard to show to my superiors that I am active and efficient, try to innovate, learn more, etc... but this will come on my nerves and i fear to become manic. OR to work in a calm mood, lazy and indifferent so that life goes smoothly, and if i am assigned a task then i should take my time to finish it so that I am not under a stress.



Is my question crazy?  The thing is I am out of work for 2 years. But I was since then in small jobs. My memory recalls that in one job I was so so relaxed and it was me who quit but i was doing fine and was accepted well. In another one I was working under stress hard enough and try to please my boss but it was them who dispensed of me.



So my question how should I react !! in a calm mode or in the speedy one ? does it sound valid

thanks

ezz  
14 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
599945 tn?1240382354
thanks. lithium had no effect in any way off it or on it. pdoc is researching new regime for me now. still cutting though and trying to find ways to divert. thank you for your help.
Helpful - 0
585414 tn?1288941302
Addressing this to you (if you don't mind) not the originator of the thread. If you were on a mood stabilizer before and went off one that might be why the other issues of concern emerged. Anti-anxiety agents do not take the place of mood stabilizers. Perhaps the Lithium was working but not as well as you wanted it to. But if it wasn't there are other options starting with Depakoate and Lamictal (I personally found Lamictal to be quite tolerable and effective) and many others in addition but those are the three most used. For more information google "Depression Central".
Helpful - 0
574118 tn?1305135284
in fact seroquel works for me fine. Except that I can't say i am totally stable. I am OK in fact, but the fact that i keep alternating between 25mg seroquel and 50mg the last few months keeps me worried. now 25mg is Ok i do sports easily but a little hypomanic at times. on the contrary 50 is better as it reduces the mania but i feel tired sometimes after a few days so it's a difficult equation. it could be that being tired is from the rest of the AP's risperidone 1mg and stelazin 2mg. My parents want me to stay a few months like until if i am stable then we begin to think to reduce the other 2 AP.
i'll report to you in due time. Hope monkeyc is not angryas i wasn't reproaching him or the like. In fact i admire his talent in trying to convince me and he is so caring and all of you in fact i feel tyou are my family
many thanksa to all of you
adel
Helpful - 0
647754 tn?1270036911
I do not want to scare you but while I was on Lithium: I had to be taken to the hospital and taken off of it........I got so I had no use of my legs and could not walk.........I became toxic to the medicine.........so please be careful........I have heard this is rare

Hope you find something that works for you



Best of luck with your job
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I must apologise for some glaring errors in my last post!  Definitely not a high concentration day today.

"piece of mind" should read "peace of mind" (groan)

where I have written "I didn't experience any weight loss", this should have read "I didn't experience any hair loss".

Sorry for any confusion.  Groggy brain and a 6 year old at home does not help :-s
Helpful - 0
599945 tn?1240382354
unfortunately lithium didn't work for me but even up to 1200mg/day i had no side effects except maybe fine tremor so long as i ate something small when i took it. hope you find something that works for you in the limited supplies available to you. best of luck with job. will be thinking of you.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi ezz

I do understand where you are coming from regarding lithium.  Its taken me 2 years to finally agree to try it!  Like you I was frightened by the few who had had nasty experiences.  I finally agreed to try it after 2 years of trying nearly everything else.  Its 4 weeks in.  The psych has started me very low both for my piece of mind and also to be sure I stay well below toxic levels.  So far so good.

With the depakote I found that the higher dose of (1000mg) did cause me to gain weight but a lower dose didn't and I lost the weight gain.  I didn't experience any weight loss, if anything my hair felt thicker.  There are an awful lot of folks though who say they have gained too much weight on it.

The trouble is that often we only get to read about the "bad" things, is it any wonder that we get worried!

The point of this response, lol?  I really just wanted to tell you my own experience and if you'd like me to I will share how I'm getting on with the lithium via PM.

Helpful - 0
574118 tn?1305135284
You have been urging me to find a new psychiatrist. Alright, there aren't any good ones here. What you really can help me is to advise on something, because you keep blaming me for going to non specialists. I am grateful to you as you try hard to draw my attention to a right diagnosis or med. The only med I think is convenient to me is lithium because I tend to be manic/hypomanic and not depressed. So lamictal and abilify are ruled out. Perhaps also depakote which i can't stand the name (hair loss+weight gain). But although you say that lithium is safe, yet i heard its drawbacks if you call it rumours from many. Yes it's the 1st line MS and good for both depression and mania as monothrepy but i am frightened from it. e.g. toxicity, keeping hydrated, etc...so really i am stuck. i take 50mg of seroquel and i know the risk of AP in general even the atypical perhaps i am hiding my eyes into the sand but i have no better alternatives. The other meds geodon, topamax etc...non existent in egypt. In my view one's combo shouldn't be something outside lamictal, lithium, seroquel and abilify and perhaps glycine in the future as ILadvocate informed us. But until Elie Lilly delivers it i can't see myself trying new meds. I hope my 50mg of seroquel will help prevent my restlesness these days. Tomorrow is my signing the contract i keep my fingers crossed that they don't change their mind. Usually i bring with me an extra 0.25 of benzo in case i feel tense there, hoping that my anxiety subsides in the few days to come. friday and saturday are days off so it helps, besides it's from 9am -3 pm only, can't be better.
You also mentioned therapy what do you mean by that e.g. CBT or what this is a luxury we can't afford here, simply people are ignorent. Believe me without insulting the country where i live it's completely different than yours, people are to the least ignorent of medicine - if not dishonnest - so don't keep blaming me plz. I know VERY WELL that you care if you or the rest of the group, but had i had competent doctors for start i wouldn't have joined your group ever. I bet i'm the only egyptian who knows what disease he has, trust me, everybody goes to their doctors and ask them for med and they take it without any objection, it's good if someone is educated or read and write. You wil be surprised to know that pharmacist (they are doctors) sell lamictal as an AD. Upon asking one of them he said you take 100mg alright this could be the therapeutic but they don't know that it should be titrated say (skin rashes, etc..). This is why i'm trying to complete the jigsaw puzzle myself as much as i can.

extremely grateful

P.S.: don't get angry i know well that you care. In fact this new pdoc advised litium in the 1st appt but we got all tense, so we'ill see. Be patient perhaps you will find me reverting to lithium one day. Because from what i see my symptoms they are pretty compatible with it. But still i need to be patient with my seroquel a little bit more. I am only on it for 6 months now.  In fact the reason why i cut a few days a 25mg of seroquel is that because i had some sweating and it says if you have sweating on this site (marketing seroqel) then it should be discontinued, but i'm afraid i went back again to 50mg as i had restlesness.
thanks a million
Helpful - 0
607502 tn?1288247540
Sigh

Adel its a cracked record my friend but we care - get yourself a new psychiatrist and medication and some therapy and you CAN feel human - its do able my friend.

You deserve this, you deserve a chance to be happy.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi adel,

The hours sound very good and if you make sure you pace yourself, take your medications and "keep an eye" on yourself, then you are doing all you can.

I am a little concerned that you think that if the job proves too much, then you are a failure or a loser.  This is absolutely not true.  If this job does not work out then it means you were "not ready" and there is no shame in that.  

Best of luck.
Helpful - 0
574118 tn?1305135284
thank you all. you were very helpful. it seems one not exactly has to work full force, and not laid back either, but at least not trying to force onself to an extreme. As Bulldozer put it "be as professional as you can be". Again as you all emphasized i have to make sure i am stable first. So i shall keep watching myself. The thing is this kind of opportunity doesn't come by often, so either i take it or stay at home forever, especially that by nature it isn't a stressful job at all from 9am-3pm can't be better, no driving (bus available for employees), so it can't be better. If i fail in this it just means i am no good, or like the western movies say "i am a loser"
many thanks
ezz
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi,
From where I'm sitting (very comfortably on my sofa), both situations could cause stress.

In situation (a) if you are "acting" high level and this is not the natural you, then the pressure to keep up will eventually make you ill.  In situation (b) if you are to laid back your bosses will think you are being lazy/don't care and you will be asked to "pull your socks up" - depending on the type of boss you have this could be done nicely or not so nicely, but you will get stressed because you feel you are letting them down and you will feel stressed because you will feel you are being watched.

In any work situation I think you have to be ready to give as much as you can give.  Be as professional as you can be. If you are not yet sure what your middle ground is then you are not ready to be going back to work.

I was so desperate to get back to work that I took a high profile job, one that had I been well I would have known was going to be too stressful for me.  I lasted  6 weeks aadel!  I was a mess at the end of it and felt an utter fool and failure.

Don't set yourself up for failure.  Before embarking back on a career be sure that you are ready.  Be sure that you understand your needs mentally and physically.  Look at the job and ask yourself if the job gives you what you need without over stretching yourself.  As monkeyc has said, most importantly, you need to be stable.
Helpful - 0
607502 tn?1288247540
Adel you do not have to work yourself into mania - I have had high stress and high pressure jobs for years and managed it.

Again you need a new psychiatrist and a real medication regime - until this happens you won be stable and you will run the risks of going manic.
Helpful - 0
599945 tn?1240382354
that's a tough one! would you be happy just taking it easy? would you be bored and have less job satisfaction? would your boss keep you on? keeping stress levels low has to be a good idea. valid question though. i gave up a job which i loved because of bullying in the workplace and the stress became too much to handle. think it was a good decision!
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Bipolar Disorder Community

Top Mood Disorders Answerers
Avatar universal
Arlington, VA
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
15 signs that it’s more than just the blues
Discover the common symptoms of and treatment options for depression.
We've got five strategies to foster happiness in your everyday life.
Don’t let the winter chill send your smile into deep hibernation. Try these 10 mood-boosting tips to get your happy back
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.