Alienation of Family

[DEJ4120]

Since I have been diagnosed some of my past behaviors are starting to make sense. I have not been in touch with my family. I avoid their contact and do not participate in family functions. I wasn't involved in the planning of one of my sister's funeral and did not sit with my family. My question is: Does bipolar cause a person to alienate family and friends?

[DEJ4120]

Thank you for sharing that, vsantos. I feel for you so. I am on the other side of your story-I being the one who did the alienating. Mine was more slow and methodical. Like WineandRoses in this thread, I did the alienating for self-protection. Now, I am not sure if what I was protecting myself from was real or imagined. Now that I am coming out of the fog, I have to come to terms with what I have done and to whom. I hope your husband gets better. In hindsight, I know that a lot of what I did was out of character and I cringe thinking about it. Perhaps in time your husband will get well enough to better relate to you and the rest of his family. Best to you.

[vsantos]

The Original question is a good one and I myself have been puzeled by this 'alianation' aspect of the Illness. Mu husband since diagnosed 11 months ago (Major /really Bad Manic Episode) has removed himself from his family, and I was the one who suffered the most, he just came home one day (a coupIe of days into his Manic Episode) and jsut told me he was leaving  me, just like that...and since then, the Husband that I've known and loved for 12 years is Gone, the 'physical' person is still there, but never again he spoke to me like before.
  He did the same with his family, not talking to them at all. and in my husband's case, we have all been extremly supportive, letting him sort thgouh his emotions (he sees a psychologist) not pushing, giving him his space...but none of it helped and now ther eis very Little contact between him and US!
   Very SAD and very confusing for those of us (the family) to understand what is going on in his Head :- (

[wineandroses]

Georgia, not sure exactly what you are asking, I think you are asking me now that your person in you life has left you, what do you do now?  Is that what you are asking?
Well, it would depend on how you depended on this person...for love, support, financially, friendship, emotionally?  What I can say without knowing your situation, is you just go forward.  Find new friends, support groups, meet people at church, etc...in short, once the initial grieving period, one must make an effort to start their life over.  As a matter of fact I am struggling to do the same thing.  I am making myself get out to meet people and that's a big feat for me cause I tend to isolate.  So, to sum this up...you have to make an active effort to get your own life going and depend on you for your happiness first and anyone else in your life is just the icing on the cake.
I hope I answered your question.  This of course is how I look at life and life situations.  Others on this site may suggest something else that would be helpful to you.  The beauty of a group support group is we  can pick and chose what applies to us from each person.  Thank you  and I wish you happiness, Jude  

[GeorgiaAnnie]

yes.  I've depended on one person for many years now, and she's left...So now what to do??

[Csandnugget]

Hello. I have alienated many people - I validated & justified the reasons to myself.
People have also alienated themselves from me.

[wineandroses]

I don't know all the details of why you are alienating from family but there could be a good reason. I recently had to cut ties with my sister because of drama.  I cannot handle the stress and drama in my life anymore.  I had to break away for self protection.  I know the lack of ability to handle stress is due to my bipolar and I know my sister has been a great source of stress for me.  To answer your question....probably.  Mostly all feelings are intensified when on has Mental Illniess.  The average person may be able to handle the stress and drama better than me but with mental illness it can be devestating.  You may want to talk with your doctor or therapist regarding this, I have.  Best of luck to you, I wish you only the best.