BiPolar, and Okay?

[missymarie214]

I've been diagnosed as bipolar since I was about 15. I'm neither type 1 or 2. They said I have my own thing going on, but I don't fit any other disorder, so bipolar it is. I was on medication for years, and after it made me gain 150 lbs(thanks Zyprexa), and lead to the development of type 2 diabetes, hypothyroidism, and high blood pressure, I stopped. Just up and quit all of it. Within 3 or 4 months I lost 90 lbs. I'm no longer a diabetic, or have thyroid problems, and my blood pressure is textbook perfect at every doctors appointment. I've also been able to achieve something I was told I never could. I'm going to be a mommy! I've never been so happy. I do still see my trusted therapist at least once a month, because pregnancy hormones have brought back some of my mood swings, which I hadn't had an issue with in over a year prior to pregnancy, and to my OB, he's still considering it normal pregnancy behavior, and not the bipolar. However, for some reason my therapist thinks that whenever I have my baby, I should be on meds immediately. She said that you HAVE to have them when you're bipolar, no matter how good you feel. She said it'll always come back, there's no fixing it yourself, or managing yourself. Meds and therapy are the answer. I just can't bring myself to believe that meds are the only way. After all of the damage they've done, I just can't bring myself to put my body through it again, especially when I need to be in the best health possible to raise my baby. Nobody believes me when I say I've discovered how to cope with the mania and the depression on my own. But the thing is, I really have. I've learned how to recognize the beginning, and force a change of pace on my brain. Whether it be through music, or physical activity, or even telling someone that I feel it coming, and we should go do something so I can change it. I'm not saying it's easy, yeah there's still some challenges depending on the particular situation(I've had a few family members die recently which was extremely tough), but I've managed. Why is it so hard for people to believe that I can be okay without meds? It took me years to develop my system of coping, but years of work has given me my life back! So my question to the community is, is it really that far fetched to believe that these things can be done on your own? And do you believe that there really is no other way besides the meds and therapy? I really want to know what other people think..

[weaver71]

I realized I was bipolar, self-diagnosed at the time, I was 20 and decided not to learn what to expect. I stopped learning about it and pretended it wasn't there. I never even thought of meds. In 24 years of knowing I am bipolar and recognizing it really started at around 30 years ago, I have taken meds about 4 months, the time after I had a bipolar 1 psychotic break. The result of not taking meds all my life, is that my therapist says I have one of the most unique and effective ways of life for coping and avoiding hospitals she has ever seen. I am not on meds now.

On the other hand, I didn't take bipolar 1 seriously enough. Now I do, and I believe my Cognition and Behavior are staying more in alignment. I have to meditate and take inventory of my mind throughout every day, but I am beginning to feel like my younger self. I don't know how long I can manage off meds, but as long as I can stay in a constructive frame of mind, not positive or negative, and maintain a concept of progress, I feel like I can behave myself and be perhaps more effective in some areas than non-bipolar people.

Interesting and controversial topic. My doctor says all people with my level of bipolar need to be medicated also, I worry her. Need is a strong word, because I should be dead by now, if that were true. Granted, I have had some pretty big adventures in mania, but most have not been negative. Mania inspires action and depression inspires empathy, what a great rhythm, as long as I don't pick up the tempo and lose the beat. I'd love to hear how you have learned to cope, or some of the landmark revelations. I have been inspired by stress lately, looking at it in a positive way has changed my whole mind set.

Anyway, thanks for the topic, frankly, I am hesitant to even bring it up. I really appreciate hearing about others who are med free. Good for you for finding what works for you. I'm still practicing.

[Bubulous]

I, personally do not believe that you have to be on medication and if you CAN live your life without medication that may be the best way to do it.  Some people just cannot.  It is not that they are a lot different or weaker than those who take the medicine, it is just that they have not learned how to deal with it.
It is like my addiction.  For a long time I could not make it without taking pain medicine.  In that situation, however, I was told that I needed to stop taking the medicine.  When I stopped I had to adopt a life style change and learn how to deal without taking pain meds.  While I was going through this I started taking medicine for my bipolar and often times it kept me from slipping up and ending back on pain pills but I wanted to be free from all medication.
I went through a similar cycle each time.
I would stop my bipolar meds first.  Later I would become unstable and slip into depression.  I would not be able to live with the depression so I would start taking my bipolar meds.  They didn't work quick enough so I started taking pain pills again.  Soon after I felt better I would try stop pain meds but couldn't so I would go back into treatment.  When in treatment I would be put back on my bipolar meds and released once I was better.
Each time the cycle would be different but ultimately the same.  This time I got out and stayed on my bipolar meds for a couple of months.  When I stopped taking them I knew what was to come and I embraced it.  I knew the depression was coming and I allowed it to pass.  I am on the other side of it now.  I am addiction free and psych med free and I am enjoying my life with all of it's ups and downs.
So my answer is...
If you feel you need the medication then take it.  If you want to stay on it forever, that is ok.  If you want to live med free then you have to learn how to do it.  You must learn about yourself, your triggers, and your coping skills.