Cold Turkey.

[gms1976]

I am bipolar. I actually I have been told I have Atypical Bipolar II Depression. Well I have been on drugs for about 3 years now. They have taken my life away from me. I just exist from day to day. I have stopped loving life. I no longer write or follow my passions. I don't feel much of anything. I am numb and dead inside. That is why I am stopping all of my meds. ALL OF THEM. Cold turkey. I am stopping Wellbutrin, Cymbalta and Abilify. I am not going to live like this anymore. I just got married for God's sake and I hardly feel any emotion or passion. My doctor doesn't care. He just wants to keep upping the meds. I am tired of it. I have stopped them all. Has anyone done this. What can I expect with regards to emotional changes and such?

[ILADVOCATE]

If you stop your medication you would definitely have a return in symptoms. If your medications cause cognitive blunting which is the side effect you are describing then you should ask your psychiatrist for a change of medication. If they are not helpful then you might want to see a different psychiatrist. This a list of all known mood stabilizers:
http://www.psycheducation.org/depression/meds/moodstabilizers.htm
I had to change medications all my life and things didn't work out until I got on a treatment in Phase II FDA study but for most people there should be a medication that works that's either FDA approved for bipolar or FDA approved but used off label for bipolar. Some medications a psychopharmocologist or mood disorders specialist would know more about. I do know that when I discontinued medications the results were a disaster and I had to go to the psych. hospital but as the mania and psychosis gradually increased over time I didn't realize it until it was too late. Remember just because you haven't responded well to one medication doesn't mean you won't be able to tolerate another.

[gms1976]

I don't think you understand. I don't have a psychiatrist. My regular MD is my doctor. I don't believe in psychiatrists. I think they are all quacks. I am an RN and I know what I am talking about. I have never had a psychotic episode in my life. Just mood swings. I just got married and we want to have children. I cannot conceive on these drugs. They cause severe birth defects. I have to stop them. That is another reason I have to stop them. I can't let these drugs control my life. Not any more. I have lived on pills for the past 3 years. I have lived with the emotional numbness and severe memory loss (that is destroying my job) and constant fogginess and the depression coming back. I have been a good little robot and taken my pills and suffered as a result. Emotionally I don't feel much or care about anything any more. I have told my husband I am stopping my meds and he is behind me 100%. I am fighting to take my life back. I have let the drugs take over. I am looking for herbal remedies for bipolar. For the first time in days I am starting to feel a little more clear headed. The world isn't a dead place. I have researched the side effects and the withdrawal symptoms. I am not going into this blind. I went undiagnosed for 25 years but I was alive. I had passion and love. I used to dream about becoming a screenwriter and novelist. I haven't written anything since I started these damn drugs. I didn't have blunted emotional affect. I didn't exist from day to day. No one seems to care so I am taking my life back. I have to.

[ILADVOCATE]

Firstly bipolar is psychiatric even if it is not a psychotic disorder. I would also say a regular doctor would know far less about how to treat it then a psychiatrist just like any other specialist. Bipolar is not just moodswings. It can affect a person's whole emotional state to the point where during depressive episodes a person has suicidal ideations and there is a loss of judgment that can affect a person's sense of being rational. You can have your concerns about psychiatry without disowning psychiatric medication as a whole. Mood stabilizers provide stability in the same way blood pressure medications control blood pressure. No one is controlling you. As for taking back your life, treatment is part of that. Its a matter of finding out what is the right medication and an informed psychopharmocologist or mood disorders specialist might be able to help more. Certainly a psychiatrist would know more than a standard medical doctor. Natural remedies are an unknown quantity. That doesn't mean they are safer than FDA approved medications. Sometimes quite the reverse. The natural remedies I take are approved by my neurologist but still an unknown quantity. The antipsychotic agent I take is in Phase II FDA study so they will have to find out more about it before its approved for use. You will find a lot misinformation on the internet about "natural mood stabilizers". Most of it is spam and misinformation. Fish oil and flaxseed oil (I know having taken them and they were authorized by my psychopharmocologist) do work as adjunct mood stabilizers but they can't replace medications. However, the anti-cholesterol medication Lovaza which was developed from fish oil is in experimental use as a mood stabilizer. If you need to stop medication during pregnancy a psychiatrist can authorize that and discuss it with your OB-GYN at that time. I had this outlook a while back too. I didn't go off medication. I did however use it as an oppurtunity to be a part of my own treatment decisions which is worthwhile for anyone.

[adel_ezz]

Hi
I understand very well what you have gone through, as I tried myself a week ago to stop everything cold turkey, but i failed. The reason why i failed is that I usually have depression and have to take regularly an AD otherwise i drop dead not able to move an arm. So i had to go back to my meds the AD of course but along with my AP's otherwise i can become manic.

Now my question if you already stopped the meds (all of them including the AD"s which have to come first) and you don't feel depressed, then I envy you because I am also an atypical BPII with depression and didn't succeed.

However there is still still the possibility of a return symptoms as told by many story tellers that when they return they are harder. So people get afraid usually and keep their meds.

Medically everybody will tell you keep the meds please, but you have a point here that you wish to become a mother, so I am with you 100% but temporarely only until you deliver your baby. I shall keep my fingers crossed