I hate to see a post unanswered, perhaps partly because what you are asking for is complex I was dx OCD for 4 years until I settle in BP. I read - not very much - about the relationship between both. I recall a canadian medical booklet sent to me by a lady here stating that OCD, PD and ADHD are gateways to BP. My pdoc told me OCD is a step which can morph into BP like a bus stop with the latter its terminus. Some here object to this view. Upon much reflexions, I came to identify my OCD as psychosis and not OCD, i.e. i use to do wrong things (not washing hands regularly like OCD do or open then close the door or afraid from touching things) but mainly it was racing thoughts which my old pdoc took it for OCD and now i know it's symptoms of BP. So perhaps your husband is never OCD rather BP only with much racing thoughts.
In the book it also says (wikipedia too) that for BP to be discovered by pdocs often takes a decade. So instead of asking people especially here not doctors try to fetch for a good pdoc.
I wish you good luck in your marriage. Hopefully you both are in counseling, separately and together and that you are both on meds. OCD is hard to live with at times depending on the objects of the OCD. I used to pick rocks when I was bad. Built paths in my yard with them. My husband checks doors and windows at night often going back to check the same door 5 times. No checking, no sleep. If you feed off of each other's mood, find a way to get out of the situation by going outside, etc.
i agree with bastet56 that you both need to be in therapy as well as medicine therapy if your doctor calls for it. sometimes a change of medicine will help but voice your concerns to your psychiatrist and go from there. try not to feed into the illness but just be supportive of each other and listen. read books on bipolar disorder, take charge of bipolar disorder by julie a fast is a good one but there are a lot out there. i don't really have ocd but have some ocd behavior due to the bipolar disorder but your psychiatrist or therapist should be able to distinguish that. i also have adhd and anxiety disorder which doesn't help the situation either so i know how more than one condition can be difficult to deal with. good luck and go to therapy.
Both of us have psych doctors we see on a regular basis. I'm telling you all, life is a challenge when both in a relationship have Bi Polar! :) I have some OCD stuff, but the more I look at it and the more I observe, I'm thinking it's the Bi Polar. Hubby is the one who has it, and it drives me crazy!!! Lately, when he's wipeing his face, it's like he feels like he has to scrub it almost raw. There was a time that he started clipping his nails and cut the heck out of his finger. That was scary!