Mania Crash

[Crystal413]

Iv'e gone from mixed states for several months to mania (as a result of a med). The mani was great for a change other than feeling like my insides were running a 100 miles an hour.  This is unusual for me. Usually I have the "Bad" mania. Well, today I crashed! Back to no energy, hopelessness, self pitty, crying on an off, impatient, anger easily etc. I think I'm back in mixed states. The story of my life, one episode after the other. Do you think it's the crash causing all these ssymptoms or mixed states. I know it will be just your opinion. I see my pdoc next week. Also can someone explain in Layman's terms by real people (as oppose to a text book) what a crash is? What's it like for you? Thank you

[weaver71]

When my mind was more elastic, is what the typo above meant.

[weaver71]

Do you have any added stress or unresolved stressors? I first felt a mixed state after a hyper mania crash. I think back and realized I had taken on the world as if I would be that manic forever. The exhaustion made it impossible to sustain my pace and recent commitments, I believe those added stressors pushed my mania to the crashing point. The mixed state or psychotic break at that point, was the worst I have ever felt, even worse than methadone detox. By putting less emphasis on how I feel and what I think I try to focus on what I am "doing," That has helped me avoid mixed states, so far. As I mentioned above, resting and meditating regularly, whether I "feel" tired or irks tally fatigued or not, seems to really be helping.

The stress put me in a catatonic state, but my mind still keeps going and going, not resting enough to feel strong again. I figured if I can't stop my mind, then I better steer it as best I can. I began to research Eustress and think of stress as motivation. I figure if I thought about positive things long enough, that logically, I would someday feel positive. So, the journey of changing my perception and MO began. I replaced the word mania with inspiration, depression became empathy, and stress is motivation.

None of this stops me from being bipolar, but as my perception slowly changes, I seem to be having positive bipolar moods. I did not say happy, because I feel sad sometimes, but my sad times are becoming more meaningful too. This was how I dealt with it as a young man, when my mi dead more elastic and every obstacle was a challenge, not defeat.

Talking to doctors and therapists, addiction specialists and Social Workers, I had come to expect the worst, and that's what I found. By percieving my moods in a more positive light, I am a little wacky and think outside the box, but I can tolerate the extremes. I have had to totally rearrange my life and am living so I don't have to fit any norm, but I still believe there is such a thing as a healthy bipolar. I will never stop striving to be one.

We find what we seek, the doors open that we knock on, and we get the answers of the questions we ask. Hope my experience helps in some way.

[Crystal413]

I feel totally diff about going to a halfway house today. I don't know what I was thinking. Mad, frustrated and alone, that's what I was thinking. And I do expect my husband to be supportive. I certainly have to wait on him hand and foot when he's sick. The one thing I can say is that he does keep my pills locked up and if I have to go inpatient for sucidal thoughts, he is here for me. For depression or other episodes, forget it. Eight yrs of this you'd think it would get better.

I'm not use to crashing so this is new to me.

Thanks for your input!

[CRSeaside]

  A manic crash for me usually includes a trip to the mental hospital. Psych unit.  Then like Bubulos, my meds must be reviewed. ( med induced mania)
Like Weaver said it's time to rest my emotions. With bipolar,for me,a crash gets me to feel suicidal.
    I never expect my husband to help. It's too hard to understand bipolar.
     If you feel a halfway house is in order, I think that's your decision Crystal.

[Bubulous]

Weaver had a really good explanation.  When I am in a manic state and crash I can either go into a mixed state or just depression.  There is a fine line as far as the symptoms go.  The biggest difference is that the mixed state may cause me to be suicidal and cause uncontrollable crying and deep hopelessness.  The last severe mixed state I had was because of a med.  Actually a med that I am taking right now.  I am back on an SSRI and I have to be cognitive and very aware of my symptoms because it can send me into mania that is hard to come out of with extreme mixed states.  It's substance induced mania which feels and acts differently than regular mania.

[weaver71]

I don't know any of the technical info on the term Mania Crash, but I can tell you what I think it is. When I am hyper manic and take on a lot of challenges, reach out like a gregarious friend to everyone, my ideas are complex and intelligent, and then it all becomes more than I can physically handle, my body and brain crash. If I am still manic, then I feel a mixed state, sometimes I just crash into depression. That's what I meant when I've said, "I just crashed." For me, the best medicine is to rest the mind and body, sometimes that is very hard. Even though my mind is racing, I try to relax into the thoughts with my eyes closed. If I can gain my strength back and maybe get some sleep, then I feel manic energy again, not mixed states. It seems a rested strong body and mind make my mania enjoyable. That is hard to maintain, but I take precautionary rest and meditation regularly, so it seems to be getting easier not to push myself into exhaustion, or Mania Crash.

[Crystal413]

I also told my husband I was moving to a halfway house. I couldn't stand not getting better and he's not helping. I told my dad and he made me realize that I couldn't stay there permanently, I did not think of that". I say and think off the wall things like this when I am feeling like I'm in an episode. Makes me realize how confused and disorganized my mind is. I think I remembered everything now.

[Crystal413]

I have also felt the need to hide some pills my husband does not know about. Sucidal Ideation has always been part of mixed states for me. I know this is a danger zone for me but I do feel safe right now.