I have been on and off Seroquel for almost 4 years. Other than some serious weight gain (60 lbs. in 14 months), the effects for me were nothing short of a miracle - suffering from Cyclothymia (lower level Bipolar, mood disorder, hypomania and acute insomnia), this was a miracle drug for me. I had tried all of the regular suspects: lamictal, topamax, trileptal, trazedone, geodon, invega (which caused a pituitary mass/tumor), etc. the Seroquel was what worked. I took 900mg at night, and was able to step down after all the weight to 300mg a night. I went from a size 2 to a size 14. I could barely stand to look at myself in the mirror. I've been under the care of an endocrinologist here in Palm Beach County, FL, who has just put me on Synthroid (lowest dosage) due to an extremely low thyroid. So, in essence, I'm totally screwed up. I don't know at this point if I'm coming or going! I feel crazy, sleep-deprived (last night was my first night without a Seroquel since moving to the Depakote 500mg). I feel like the Depakote is baby aspirin compared to what my body is used to/needs. I did not sleep AT ALL last night. I am sweating like a pig (side effect of the Synthroid), cold, shaking, unable to calm down, and I'm not supposed to be taking the Klonipin since we're trying to control my weight - I'm getting married in December. After topping the scales at 202, I'm down to 180, but should be in the 130-155 lb region.
I can't take the NO SLEEP thing. I am absolutely miserable. Not only is this affecting me - but, I'm angry, agitated, upset, up/down, and all over the place - and this is killing my fiance. He is VERY patient, but I can't help but snap at him and push him away, and feel totally alone in my own body at this point. And no one understands. They say they do, but they're not on a roller coaster in their head. I have used marijuana in the past to sleep (before being diagnosed), and am considering using this as a "help" to go to sleep... I can't take staring at the ceiling for another 9 hours tonight. Other than that, my only option is to get out of bed and play Spades on Yahoo to keep myself busy. That always lessens the chances that I might catch at least an hour or two of sleep, so I try to stay in bed.
It's easy for others to say "stick with it" and "you'll feel better" but I feel like SCREAMING at them that they should go through a few days with no sleep, while upholding my job at a prestigious mutual funds clearing house. I don't want to lose the love or the job of my life. PLEASE HELP ME!!!
I'm looking for any alternative to what I've already taken... I don't respond well to anti-depressants (seem to have the opposite effect on me - DEPRESSION!), and am at a loss for hope.
Sleepless in Palm Beach County