Hi. I am having issues with my family. Last year I had a bad year. I ended up in the mental hospital twice (and checked myself out way too soon, but in my defense, I was scared of being there). I have been diagnosed with Asperger's Disorder (high functioning Autism) and Bi-Polar Disorder for 12 years (since I was 14), and last year received the additional diagnosis of "Anxiety" and we are still working on confirming or ruling out Scizophrenia (I was 25 when the symptoms onset and I am 26 now.)
I never really received the help I needed for my illnesses because my mom didn't believe anything was wrong with me & ended up moving us across the country less than a year after my diagnoses and never pursued further help. Last year, during a delusional episode in which I was not in control of my bodily actions or verbal output, I called an ambulance because I had a lucid moment. My mother & her husband were there and I don't remember what exactly I said and did, but whatever it was made them so angry that they didn't follow the ambulance to the hospital & instead went home. They lost me for a full 24-hours when I was transferred from the ER Detainment Unit to my psychiatrist's Emergency Hold Unit for Assessment & admittance to a mental hospital.
They still didn't understand or try to help me even after that episode.
This past August I was admitted to the ER in the town I had moved to in May (5 hours away from Mom & her hubby) for having blackouts again. I was diagnosed with Syncope (loss of consciousness due to low blood pressure) and hypokalemia (low potassium which can cause delusions, hallucinations and blackouts). The next day, after I was released, I called to let them know I was back out of the hospital (I had informed them and my two sisters who lived in the same town as me when I was leaving for the ER & kept them updated with the testing and results and trwatment). When I talked to them after I got out, they offered for me to move into their RV while I got my feet under me and continued receiving treatment. They said that in exchange for a place to live (including utilities), I could help them care for my elderly grandparents. They told me they needed my help and asked me if I would be willing to be a part of their TEAM.
Since then, they still claim to be supportive and understanding about my mental health issues; however, as time passes and I continue to do better for longer periods of time and I have fewer and fewer relapses (that they see), they are becoming less and less understanding about any relapses I DO have & the things I DO still struggle with. Its like they expect me to be perfect (emotionally, psychologically, behaviorially, and symptomatically) all the time.
I had an Anxiety Attack which preceded a Manic Episode last weekend (and the Mania is still going on even now), and both of them (as well as my sister who visited this past week) accused me of being on Meth (all of them accused me at separate times and in private, but all of them eventually asked me straight out if I was on Meth). I have a history of USE, even of ABUSE of Meth, but I never allowed myself to get addicted to it AND I hadn't done it since BEFORE my move across the state in May (when I moved away from home). I truthfully denied using, and offered to have them accompany me to my doctor's office for me to do a UA to prove I wasn't on drugs, but they turned me down AND STILL DON'T BELIEVE ME.
I tried explaining to them the effect my mental illnesses have on my behavior and why I am good sometimes and stuggle at other times, but they either didn't care or didn't believe me. My sister straight out told me she didn't believe me and my parents just gave me a look that said they didn't.
I don't want to go home (to the RV in their driveway) because I hate the way they look at me and how it makes me feel, but I can't avoid and ignore them and their accuisational judgment forever. So, as I said above:
*WHAT CAN I DO TO HELP MY FAMILY UNDERSTAND WHAT MY MENTAL ILLNESS DIAGNOSES ARE AND WHAT THEY MEAN?
*HOW DO I EXPLAIN HOW THE ILLNESSES EILLNESSES?
I love them, and I don't want them to feel bad, but I also don't know how to explain to them how much their accusations & unwillingness to do their own research to understand better hurats me. I have already done the research and offered to share it with them, but was rebuffed every time. It is almost to the point that I want them to come to one of my counseling appointments so I can have my counselor help me to communicate with them and get them to understand.
(Sorry its so long & thank you in advance for any help!!!)