Well, the difference between depression and bipolar is that with depression you will have times when you are okay and happy. Mania is something extreme that is also destructive.
Mania is a very strange thing. Here on the board we all have different types of mania. I, for example, do not have euphoric mania which is the unbelievably happy and good, the life of the party so to speak. I don't have the desire to party or drink or do drugs, I don't have a desire to have relations with stragers, and I don't gamble or spend all of my money on shopping sprees. I have the irritated, frustrated, no concentration or focus hypomania (not as high as mania) full of anxiety (I have the same anxiety when I am depressed it just comes out in different ways.) I feel like my brain is going 1000 miles an hour and I can't keep up. It is full of paranoia and repetitive racing thoughts that I can't seem to control or stop. I talk and talk and often don't really make sense as I jump from topic to topic. For me it usually lasts 1-7 days, (7 being rare.) Sometimes I think I have what is called a mix state where I am both depressed and in this manic stage at the same time. I actually think I have that more than just hypomania.
This is me. Others are different. Hopefully by hearing about other people you can see if you might fit in to bipolar. Track your mood and then take it with you to see your doctor. That will help them understand.
Nobody here will be able to dx you correctly, you need a pdoc.
However my view towards newcomers is that they shouldn't rush the symptoms; for they will escalate or eventually disappear. About the mania being euphoric or not, my experience all mania start euphoric then after a while turn disphoric with mixed states. If yours is only euphoric it means your illness is at an early stage and it's dangerous to accelerate the symptoms. One way to do that is via antidepressants they are like releasing the brakes as one said here right and you directly get the mania which starts as i said euphoric then after a while disphoric.
You didn't say what sort of drugs you take. If you don't take any then i advise you to be patient. I know you are frustrated. But believe me you didn't experience the frustration that most of us feel when the drugs stop working. if things deteriorate much further then consult a pdoc. Only them can tell you not a person online.
My understanding about the UK is that they tend to be on the conservative side, i.e. they don't move unless things are really bad. Besides have you been to a GP because those can't be of any help, not their specialities.
Bipolarity means 2 poles, mania and depression sometimes you cycle between both too quickly, sometimes this is due to antidepressants. One thing positive is that you didn't experience mixed states the worst of all. Perhaps you have severe mood swings if there is such thing, perhaps mild bipolar like cyclothemia worsenned by antidepressants. To cut things short for you consult a pdoc
HI !! I'm Bi-polar 1 rapid cycler,Borderline Personality Disorder. I am a bundle of joy or my worst nightmare.
Having been on my own most of my life I am a very disciplined person ( single parent and all )
While un medicated I built a very sucessful Hair Salon , Designed and contracted out my home being built.
Raised a beautiful loving daughter
Started a book " Two Blocks North Of Poor White Trash " Sill in the making.
And then UGLY hit, for over 3 years I was totally un stable Another story
I had to hang in there even on the days that I suffered suicide ideation.putting off self cutting one hour at a time. Closed my business
BY GRACE and me keep showing up and trying to get better````BINGO we found the right combo of meds I have been more than stable I have a fulfilled life today.
I hope by reading these experiences it will help you come to terms with some things
These have been the tip of my iceburges...be blessed
Like xila, I don't have the euphoric high of mania. I also have the irritable, frustrated, full of anxiety and raging hypomania. I am a type 2 rapid cycler. Also, I have Borderline Personality Disorder, and I strongly urge u to read up on that disorder as well. When u said a little about urself, this disorder popped up in my head, expecially when u said u don't take rejection well. Thats something thats very prominant with us BPDers, as well as a strong fear of abandonment. I'm like u...my mood swings are so erratic and to such extremes that I can't even live a normal life. Definitely go see a doctor and again, I would look at Borderline Personality Disorder too. Good luck and let us know how it goes. :)
I am bp but went through major depression for 5 yrs where the depression was so bad that I had ECT. I now have mixed episodes which are a new ring of hell where you are both manic (anxiety and energy as well as racing thoughts ) with the world-is-going-to -end any minute and depressed state all at once. Not a nice place to be.
If you can, try again and have a go again at another dr. Try one more time . Try writing things down so that they can read it or u can read it to them. It helps.
thank u all for the comments I really appriciate them all. No Im not taking any form of medication as Ive never had a diagnosis other then "ur a wmen its pmt get on with it".As I said this has been going on all throughout my 20s although I have very long periods when I feel absolutly fine. My depressive states come completly out of the blue and frighten the hell out of me. At my worst I self harm and think things I should nt.
again thanks for the advice I'll take it all on board.