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455859 tn?1233363788

living with others that r not family HELP

So we had no choice but to move in with a person who is like a second mom to my hubby I don't know her well and at first all was great but it seems to be sinking my hubby is hinting it's me n My Bipolar but she can just be so aggresive at times and I feel like she is overly harsh and getting harsher with my daughter I bite my tounge I know I don't work I clean the house far above what she kept it at when ever I saw it cook dinner and help out doing as much as possible trying not to over step my boundries I am wondering if I have really bad dilivery or if maybe there is something I do in person that affens others I am pritty good at expressing myself in letters or wrighting u know but when I get interupted and feel like i am getting tag teamed or attacked verbley it is hard for me to not defend myself and just drop things

she made a comment about Bipolar people that really affended me and she was not even willing to hear me out about it She said Bipolar people use "Being Bipolar as an excuse" when I tried to explain it'sa disease uncontrollable like cancer but atleast cancer can possibly go away this really never does and it's really hard to live with she really just shot me down made me feel like I was just scum n lazy she said it's life u don't see me not working and falling a part I had no choice and I don't try to argue I just try to give people knowledge on it I do read a lot and want to understand it the best I can so I can get better I told her my situation befor I moved in my hubby say's that I need to just not be so sensitive and take everything sooo personal but how do u not when someone yells there point in a mean tone and then say's n that's all I have to say about that Its just really hard n I feel sooo alone with very few freinds well not counting my hubby 1 2 be accurate

It's more then just this one thing there r several situations where I do something and she kind of treats me like a child with the way I was raised I was never told really what to do so at 25 this is weird and she wont even really talk to me and argues sooo manythings which make me feel like I know nothing about anything I just have never really lived with people and the last time went sour so I am feeling like is it me if I come off Like this or rude to people onhere and just not realise it I want freinds just mature down to earth real ones and I want to  help people understand how I am feeling and just listen u know please be honest and straight forward If it is me I want to get better IREALLY MEAN WELL THANK YOU 4HELPING!!!

2 Responses
447130 tn?1225470866
You know it sounds like a mix of a few things. One is ignornance on her part, I would get her a book about Bipolar disorder or print something off the internet specific to your type and let her read what the experts say. I tried to explain to my exhusband and it was the same thing, "calm down, your too sensitive". Well I think we are more sensitive so maybe that can be something you can work on where she's concerned. Having said that, it sounds like she is controlling and stubborn and you don't need to bite your tounge when it comes to raising your daughter! You are very eloquent in your writings, I'm sure you can find a nice way to tell her to back off.
And lastly, I would ask flat out, what does she expect from you and have her write it down. If she wants you to just "get better" then she needs to be educated that it won't happen. Go to NAMI.org and print off some stuff and let her read it. That's a neutral site and it won't be "your" definition of bipolar so maybe she'll take it in.
It sounds like this isn't a good living situation for you and your family and you may want to eventually think about leaving.
I know how you feel having few friends and little support. It's really hard. My thoughts are with you, I know how difficult it can be. I'm always around if you need support!!
Erin
455859 tn?1233363788
Thank u it's just hard allways being a very independent person to have no control over anything I love to work n want to work but we r waiting until my daughter starts school since daycare is outragous and she is stubbern n controlling but I think she means well but maybe just cant understand in comparison to someone who knows nothing about addiction and they cant fathom why u just cant not do it if I have that ability then why dont u sort of thing I have thought about doing that but then just thought she is doing us a huge favor maybe means well but has bad delivery or is un capable or unwilling to understand and research I just dont want to push something on her and have it blow up with us in a worse situation I just was thinking things allways look or sound different in comparison to how u hear ur voice and how it sounds when u listen 2 a recording of it I thought maybe it is me n I have no clue or idea so if others on here see the samething then it must be me and I want to fix or change that 4 sure I don't want to make people upset but I also dont or really am unable to just be a quit no comment about a subject I know or feel strongly about u know

this whole convo started because I was defending her sons girlfreind who very well maybe bipolar and she doesnt like her I am not one to judge a person on others opinions or jump on the ban wagon I make up my own mind n to me she means well and I can tottaly relate to the girlfreind so all of this tension stemed after I went to the gym with her and it was like ohh u trader type of high school bs that just doesnt impress or is anything I need or want

This girl is a nice girl a lot like me or should i say I see simularities could she be bipolar  it does run in her family so her chances are greater but even if not I am not going to post judgements because she does do good and the mom has nothing good to say about her I want her to feel comfortable and she even expressed that since I have been here she has felt more comfortable to come out of the back room n stuff and that makes me feel like ok thats a good thing well off to the doc thank u so much sory to just dumo everything I like being at the other end but figured why not ask 4 help when u need something I have a hard time doing and since I have vented I have felt sooo much calmer and hearing other opinions good or bad will give me a better understanding which is what I need thanks Erin U ROCK
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