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Borderline Personality Disorder Community
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Avatar universal

Am I going crazy?

I'm 20 years old I have a 3 year old daughter that I have brought up completly on my own scinse she was one after I was in a demestic violence relationship for 1 year, ever scinse I have noticed a lot of changes, I've developed quite sever anxiety, and don't like being out without a trusted adult with me, also Everytime I get too close too a guy I have to stop meeting them, in the last 12 months I've turned to drugs such as MDMa, coke, speed, diazepam, and my alcohol intake has increased, I realise that drug abuse increase depression but recently my anger, anxiety and depression have gone so high I don't know who I am anymore, my daughter has been taken temperarly out of my care due to my own choice becouse I no I need to get some sort of help to get me back on track but all my family and friends have turned there back on me and think I'm making it up, I really don't no what to do, no one understands wat I'm going through and I don't know where to go or who to talk to, please help feel like I'm loosing my mind!
3 Responses
Avatar universal
Also I have considered looking into getting myself sectioned for a few days, is
Avatar universal
I too do not have my son because of mental illness and my own choice to let him stay with his father
Avatar universal
This is for all but the first especially. Bpd is a disorder that causes the sufferer to think in a selfish way not always realizing how you come off to others. But the sufferer knows the difference between right and wrong. It is h highly important that you take responsibility for actions that you are aware of. The drug use is now ur main issue. You must decide now what your future will be meaning you have a lot to start changing. I have bpd and i can tell u that it is difficult but you.can lead a normal life with theright behavioral therapy. Behavioral type therapy is designed to chang  lifelong behavioral habits and takestime. But it works if you take it seriously. You are young and if you seek help now imagine what your future can be. I have a bs in psychology and i have not only the educationbut the experience of suffering bpd depression and anxiety disorders so that i can truly sayi understand. I also recommend you look up narcissistic personality disorder as i have a feeling this may apply to you. Do not put this off. First seek treatment for the drug alcohol problem because that will make u worse and is more difficult problem than ur disorder. Tell ur family u want to change and listen to them. U need to decide to admit urself to a nice reputable rehab/mental health residence to get u off the drugs and to then start addressing your behavioral disorder. Give them proof that u mean it by going andtell them to support u in this as u will need it.  
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