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Borderline Personality Disorder Community
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Avatar universal

Attention seeking

Hi everyone,

I hope that I'm posting this in the correct place.

I have a slightly embarrassing problem that has come about over the last few weeks. It sounds really silly when I think about it when it's not happening, but when I am thinking about it, I don't think of it as silly for some reason!

I keep having this kind of craving to attention seek - Like if I'm walking down the road and see an ambulance coming by me, I think to fall on the ground so that they'd stop and well, I'd get some kind of attention from it.

I'm a healthy 25 year old with no previous mental health issues etc and think of myself as a pretty normal person!

I don't know why I keep have this go around in my head.

Thanks.
97 Responses
Avatar universal
Things can just go but usually it is when something significant happens.  Like for example, a significantly depressed person becomes well after the birth of their grandchild.  Some quite major life event, I guess.  I don't know if anxiety would truly go though.  Maybe given the right circumstances.  It sounds like quite a big risk to take with your life when you have the power to do something about it now.

Perhaps talking about it has helped.  Or maybe you're just able to cut it off into black and white.  Maybe even on this forum anybody would feel healthier in comparison to others.

You're right it doesn't sound like something you specifically need.  Not if you prioritize your needs.  Maybe you could look up psychologists, etc in your area.  Would you have a doctor who could recommend one or refer you to one.  Want to go private?
Maybe even try Dr Gould's free three-day trial of his program.

Procrastinating creates stress anyway.  You should make a decision either way.  If you decide not to it is always something you could revisit down the track.

It's hard for me to remain neutral on this and not judge.  Like I have said though you know yourself best.  Do what is right for you.
Avatar universal
I'm a healthy 25 year old with no previous mental health issues etc and think of myself as a pretty normal person!  --  your words

Question and I'm only wondering, not passing judgement in any way - why did you choose this forum "borderline personality disorder" on which to post?
Avatar universal
It sounds like you may want someone to nurture you or to take some responsibility for you at the moment.

Maybe you're feeling a little stressed or overwhelmed.  Maybe you just desire a relationship (where someone is there for you).

It could mean a number of different things.  Not sure what.  If these thoughts continue it probably wouldn't hurt to see a psychotherapist for a short period.
Avatar universal
Thanks for the replies...

First of all, I didn't see anywhere else to post for mental health kind of questions.. Unless I missed a better section, this is kinda where I ended up posting!

Jaquta - What you say is true - I'm finding some thing pretty difficult as I moved countries a few years back and since moving, have found it tough to make friends and only have one family member here that recently got married so we're not as close any more. I'm happy and not feeling depressed or anything, I socialize when I'm at work etc - I just have this weird urge to get some attention like faking an injury or something - But not to really injure myself! That's the only thing that goes around in my head to do - Trying to get rid of the thought!
Avatar universal
I personally like the mental health expert forum but I know it's not possible to ask a question there all the time and currently the expert is away.  =(
The anxiety and depression forums are also good places to go to ask questions.  Here is a good place too.

Sounds like an obsession.  The ocd community or the obsessive compulsive behaviors expert forum may be able to offer advice.  

As you are generally fairly healthy I would expect having deeper, more meaningful relationships would help.  Have you thought of joining a club or an interest group.  They can sometimes be good distractors and good ways to meet like-minded people.

If the problem does continue to exist, or gets worse, I would recommend seeing a psychotherapist.

Good luck.
Avatar universal
Thanks for the reply ;-)

I'm always trying to make an effort to do new things and meet people and make friends - But just hasn't worked out for me yet. I guess it takes time as the first time you meet someone maybe you say a few words to each other, but if you only see them once a week in class etc, it takes time to build on that and get to know each other better.. I am trying though.

I don't think I'm going to go insane or anything, but I kinda feel weird - Like coming on the way to work on the bus, I start to feel like I could scream or something - I know it's all the power of the mind and I can control it, but it's kinda weird all the same. At this point, I don't feel depressed or anything so at least I haven't got that (!), just kinda feeling weird now and again.
Avatar universal
Whilst I am here ;-) ....I have this weird OCD thing that I've had probably 10 years now but it never really bothered me and I guess that a lot of people can have the same thing, so I was never worried about it - But I notice that it's worse when I am worried about something or have something on my mind like now and it starts to bug me. Does anyone know the reasons for OCD? It's really weird and I'll try to explain it (ah more embarrassment coming my way) - I have this thing where I do things in pairs to make an equal number, like 2, 2, 2, 2, 2 = 10. Like I'll tell myself I have to tap 2 fingers on my thumb, and each time I do, that counts as two, so I do it 5 times to 'make 10' and then stop.
Avatar universal
It's funny, I always used to laugh at my American friends (I am English) because they always seem to have mental or physical problems to deal with. Serves me right for now taking a look at myself and seeing the things I have...

Also, I've never had a panic attack but was really close to having one I think a couple of weeks ago at work (or maybe it was half of one!) - I was sitting eating lunch and the funny thing was, I wasn't even thinking of anything that was stressing me out - Only at the point that I started to tingle, blood was rushing to my face and hands and my heart was racing, I started to worry about that. I've fainted a couple of times in the past and could really feel that this was the real thing and that if I didn't control it, it could happen. Luckily I got up right away and left work and walked around the block and shook it off - I hope that I'll be good like this in the future controlling other stuff.

I don't have big stresses in my life luckily, I guess I just worry about the future a bit and what and where I am going in life, like all of us.

I'm not a messed up person but some things have happened in the past to me, just like everyone, that is still in my mind and 'bothers me' - For example, I'm not really in touch with my Mother which is kinda tough and I still hold resentment about what she was like as a Mother and some things that happened when I was a teenager (nothing extreme like abuse etc) - Is there anyone asides from a psychologist that can help me with these thoughts and work out my emotions and put these things to rest?
Avatar universal
Thanks to everyone's input, it's really helped.

I'm going to look in to getting some help I think - I don't think it's right that I should carry on living like this. Sometimes it is worse and sometimes it's OK, but today for example has been a weird day. I didn't have a bad day, I even went to join the gym (which I think could be great for me, as I used to do lots of sports and keep fit!) but it's come to being at home by myself in the evening and I've felt the need to escape somehow, and I've been drinking and am really at this point trying to control myself as to not drink too much more. I don't drink often, maybe once every 2 weeks, but I guess it's not right to feel the need to do something like this in order to escape. My aim is to drink until I fall asleep and that's where I'm heading.

Anyway, that's enough from me - It looks like I like hearing my own voice and being the centre of attention - But it's not the case. Thanks for listening to me vent.

Be seeing you all around. ;-)

Amy.
Avatar universal
A friend?  The doctor on the mental health expert forum has a self-help program you can work through.  His website is myvirtualshrink.com.  I think he has a three day free trial.

Like everyone you're just wanting to feel heard and be fixed.

It sounds like you should possibly get some early intervention before things get out of control or you lose a couple of year of your life wondering what's next or about things you have done or not done.
The anxiety needs to be worked through.  I think the more effective approach is to talk through issues vs just medicating them.

I hope that helps a little.

Good luck!
Avatar universal
Thanks Jaquta - You've been very helpful!
I agree with what you have said.
Amy.
Avatar universal
You know what, thinking about it a bit more, I guess there is 1% of me that wants things to get worse, probably so that I can get some attention out of it and be taken care of - That's what I need to control.

I was seriously stupid last night - I was by myself and decided to have a drink, just to get a little tipsy and 'let my hair down' - I ended up getting pretty drunk and collapsed in bed. I woke up this morning and needed to go to work, but knew that my stomach was in a bad state. Ended up not going to work and vomiting. Not good. I haven't been sick from drinking in years. In all honesty, as rough as I have felt today, I'm just laughing at myself for doing that. I don't and won't do that again for a long long time.
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