Avatar universal

Does my mother exhibit symptoms of BPD or bipolar?

I strongly believe my mother has Borderline Personality Disorder or Bipolar Disorder/Depression.

The symptoms I noticed:

--Uncontrollable fits of rage at inappropriate situations (even something I see as a small misunderstanding instead makes her go into a fit of rage, yelling, screaming, etc.,)
--Extreme mood swings. She can go from rage mode to laughing at something on TV and be in a good mood again three minutes later.
--She has "intense and stormy" relationships with her children (my sister and I), my dad (her husband), her friends, her family, etc., Her relationships are very unstable.
--She exhibits symptoms of being emotionally unstable.
--I'm not sure if this is related to BPD, but she is extremely paranoid. Some of her thoughts: " As I pull into the garage, I always have to look behind me as the garage door goes down so nobody slips in". "I can't leave my child at home while I go outside because someone's going to come in and kidnap her!" "I have to check the alarm system multiple times--what if a burglar turned it off?"
--My mother often randomly remembers things that made her upset 20 years ago, both the big ones and the trivial ones. These memories will suddenly come back to her randomly, and she'll be extremely overemotional and full of rage (kicking, yelling, screaming, whining) for hours as if the event had repeated itself again.
--She often overidealizes others, especially her close friend. She treats her close friend much better than she treats us, her own children. Each family secret or private, personal matter is told to that friend. Each thought, emotion, feeling is told to that friend. We have no privacy in our family anymore because everything is always told to that friend. If someone, even members of her own family, states something such as trivial as "Mom, why do you talk to her all the time?", she becomes very angry, starts screaming and yelling, and strictly defends that friend.
--She has not attempted suicide, but sometimes does threaten to, though she never actually does it.
--She has had a problem with major anxiety in the past.
--She puts herself above others. My sister was recently accepted to an excellent, top-notch, one of the best high schools in the US (this school was in New England), but in order to attend, we would have to move...my mother's reasons for not moving were "it's too cold up there" "i don't like the weather" "i don't like the houses up there" and threw multiple fits day after day after day because of how she didn't want to move until finally, my sister had to decline the admission offer.
--She can be verbally abusive.

Does my mother have BPD or Bipolar disorder/depression?
Please ask any questions if you need any more details.
1 Responses
Avatar universal
i saw your question here and looked like there were no responses so although im no doctor or healthcare provider ill give it a shot.
it took many years and different therapists, doctors ect before i was diagnosed with BPD as many other disorders can mimic certain symptoms, mood swings for example could be in bpd OR bipolar, however while i was diagnosed with bpd as well as major depression and ptsd im NOT diagnosed with bipolar tho i believe it is possible someone could have both disorders at the same time. having said that i can relate with much of what your describing here, severe mood swings, suicidal thoughts (and actions in my case). idealizing some people for a time then despising them later. reliving past experiences in my head but feeling angry about it the rest of the day tho it happened when i was a kid and should be able to move on. paranoia as well... again im def no doctor but will say much of what you say here in regards to her behaviors and everything closely lines up with me so id say she probably does have bpd. i have read online quite a bit about it and have seen many times ( just like in my personal situation) that other disorders can/ will pair up with it so she could hypotheticly have bpd AND bipolar... or ocd or ptsd... ect  hope this helps, best of luck to you and her

You are reading content posted in the Borderline Personality Disorder Community

Popular Resources
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.
Can I get HIV from surfaces, like toilet seats?