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Avatar universal

Breastfeeding advice for first time mum

Hi, I'm expecting my first baby at the end of March and really really want to breastfeed her, but the more I seem to read up on it the more I feel it's more difficult than I thought and I'm worried I'm not going to be able to do it. It doesn't help either that most of mine and my husbands family are very anti-breastfeeding and I feel like they will be waiting for me to fail so they could say they told me so, a lot are very opinionated, their opinion is the only right one to them and they don't hold back in telling you what they think. I accept it doesn't always work but I'm so determined, has anyone else been through/felt like this or got any tips for helping to make breastfeeding work? Thank you
15 Responses
Avatar universal
Speak to some lactation specialists. They're probably the most helpful.
1 Comments
Thank you for your comment I'll have a Google what's in my area :)
12137039 tn?1423925847
I'm also due the end of March. Also with my 1st child many family members were eager to watch me fail in breast feeding. I was only able to do it 3 months bc I didn't produce much milk. Tbh it is hard (very) but don't let others decide that for you and be strond. As a women you are totally capable of nursing your child.  At the end tho I was taking Fennel seed vitamins and drinking mothers tea. And I was leaking from all the milk I was producing thanks to the tea and vitamins. It was my choice to stop and I regret it so much. Now with my second I'm ready to conquer this and breastfeed my child as long as I'm able to bc there is no better Milk/food  they can have. And having practice before helps alot. :) I hope the best for you, you CAN so do it!
1 Comments
Thank you ill have a look into those :) it's a horrible feeling isn't it, makes me more determined to prove them wrong but slightly on edge thinking I'm being watched and judged all the time, theyre just waiting in the wings ready to say we told you so!
Avatar universal
Hey honey, making a baby and nurturing a baby is natural. We are naturally made for it. Don't let books and papers scare you. There's nothing to it, just enjoy every beat of it! I was reading too much into people's experience with conception, miscarriages, etc and I lived in fear always thinking the worse is gonna happen and was so anxious for my next MD visit. Everything have been fine, no morning sickness, no a lot of pregnancy sysmptoms or what so ever and yet my baby is perfect, heart rate perfect, measurements perfect...so I decided I'm not gonna be afraid anymore coz everyone is different. I will forget about everyone's experience and focus on enjoying mines.
1 Comments
Thank you and I'm pleased it's all gone well for you :) I felt scared up to the 12 week mark and although I've just gone past 23 weeks there's still a part of me that worries something bad will happen! What will be will be at the end of the day just have to stay positive don't we :)
Avatar universal
Not everyone has a hard time breastfeeding :) set yourself up for success. Get some nursing tanks, a nursing pillow or two, get a pump (like nursing, pumping takes time to learn too and is useful to boost supply or if baby wont latch you can still pump) learn different positions to try. Do pay attention to tips on success. Ask for help if you need and get the number for a lactation consultant after the baby is born :)
1 Comments
Thank you - got a couple of those bits already, haven't sorted nursing bras as I'm only 23 weeks, figured my boobs still have a good bit of growing to do yet so waiting till nearer the due date :)
Avatar universal
Think positive, not everyone struggles it was effortless with me and my first. Don't get down about it before you have a reason too!
Avatar universal
I highly recommend finding a LaLeche League near you. I was able to phone the rep in my area a few times when I was in tears and couldn't figure out what to do. They are a great support group and you get the opportunity to meet other moms in your area who breastfeed.
http://www.llli.org/
Avatar universal
I was nervous with my first trying to breastfeed and after a rough start (6 weeks of not getting it down great) I fed her exclusively for 16 months before I started to stop producing.

My big mistake was letting the nursing consultants in my room at the hospital... I was Way too exhausted and emotional for it. :|
The l&d nurses were more helpful to me. Also if you OB is a women OR has a midwife on staff ask them! I took  daughter in when I got thrush and she gave me a one on one sessions and helped me get confident with my nursing.
Getting classes before you give birth are great but one on one with someone after you get home from giving birth is even more helpful.
1 Comments
Oh wow I'm glad to see perseverance pays off, will have a look at some support in my area too, see the midwife on 12th December so was going to ask her too :)
Avatar universal
Determination was key for me. My failed attempt at natural birth spurred me on to get at least 1 thing right. Ask for help from the breastfeeding support if your not getting latch right and getting sore. The first 2 weeks are the worst but then it's like you've always breastfed and you won't remember what was so awkward in the beginning. Good luck x
1 Comments
Thank you :) x
Avatar universal
Hey honey it is me ill tell them put their opinions inside their *****...you can do it...just do everything you have to do talk with doctors with everybody you needs to so make sure get all help you needs and that is it...the rest gonna happen naturally...forget about what they said and focus in what you wan...everything gonna be fine.
1 Comments
I hope so! Might be time to start voicing my opinions, they aren't the ones losing sleep at night after they have so why should I worry about doing the same back!
Avatar universal
Hi..I just had my baby 10 days ago a I am nursing.. its not easy and does take patience and determination. The latching was pretty easy but the positioning of baby and the pain can be discouraging but after a good 1 to 2 weeks your nipples get used to it and pain will get away. I def recommend you let the nurse know you and interested in lactation classes at the hospital and the specialist will literally work with you 1 on 1 to show you different positions to latch your baby and how the baby should latch on the nipple. It is such a beautiful experience. When you have your baby and have your baby bonding experience try to latch your baby its like a natural instinct for babies to latch. Good luck if you have any questions feel free to contact me. Oh! Also please note, you won't have any milk for about an week or so but don't be discouraged it took me about 8 days for actual milk to come in... I pump, nurse and formula feed when I see im not producing enough milk for little one.
1 Comments
Congratulations on the birth of your little one :) and thank you for the tips, 1-2 weeks doesn't sound so bad, I've suffered awfully with sickness since week 6 and some days have felt like they're really dragging, just tell myself each day is a new day and it might not be so bad and here I am at 23 weeks sorta getting there/is lol hoping the same logic applies with bad feeding days and nights!
10791413 tn?1480252024
Some wome quit because it isn't immediately easy. DONT FALL INTO THIS. Breast feeding is a learned process for you AND baby. It may be natural, but it will take time and persistence to get comfortable with it. 3 weeks in, and you'll be a pro. Get yourself a boppy, nipple shields, nursing bra, mini pitcher for water, a good electric pump (your insurance should cover it) set yourself up for success! I didn't BF my first because I let others convince me that he wasn't getting enough milk, because he kept latching. I didn't know that it was normal. I learned that BF is hard work, especially in the beginning, but it DOES get easier. You learn.

Make sure you are drinking water while you nurse, and your baby latching on, what seems to be constantly, in the beginning may feel slightly painful. Nursing consultants will say "it's not supposed to hurt, if it does, you're not latched correctly." That's simply untrue. Someone pulling on your already sore nipples and chest every hour WILL hurt a bit in the beginning lol. Neither you or the baby are immediate experts.

It takes learning, and patience, and support, but YOU ARE BUILT FOR THIS! You CAN do it.

I didn't think I could, but my 13 month old hanging from my nipple RIGHT NOW says otherwise. YOU CAN AND YOU WILL.
2 Comments
Wow thank you :) there's so many tips I can take from that thank you, I keep reading about this latching business and it makes me think it's not that easy, they managed all these years ago though when there were no bottles and formula didn't they!
Babies have definitely been eating long before bottles lol. But if you choose to pump, or formula feed, let it be YOUR choice.
973741 tn?1342342773
Hey there.  I relate to what you are saying  My side of the family were all bottle feeders and my husband's mother who inserted herself where I least wanted her was all over me to breast feed (which made me not want to do it, ha ha).  When I had my first baby, a lactation nurse comes to visit you.  She tries to help you get into the hang of breast feeding as it is the IN thing right now at hospitals (I feel like this swings one way or the other every few years with what is the popular choice).  Remember. breast feeding is instinctual to a newborn.  Lots of it is just getting them up there and then their instincts kick in and they start feeding no problem.  With my first, *I* had some issues (not baby).  Basically, it hurt like a mother you know what initially.  But Lanolin (purple tube) to the rescue as well 'as airing dry'.  I did both breast feeding for baby number one and bottle feeding.  Right off the bat too.  They say to wait before offering a bottle so they don't get confused but my baby did both and never had any issues.  I had bleeding nipples for crying out loud, I needed the bottle back up!  Anyway, after a couple of weeks, I was much more comfortable and baby and I were a well oiled machine.  Second baby, latched and fed within minutes and never had an issue.  Honestly, while I was very resistant to breast feeding, I loved it.  I missed it when it was over.  It's a much different experience than I thought it would be.  SOOOO, my suggestion is to give it a good try and see how you feel about it. Formula these days is pretty awesome and I don't really know if babies breast fed are truly any healthier than those that aren't.  My kid that gets sick most often and has allergies?  My exclusively breast fed son. ha ha.  But I wouldn't have traded that nursing time for anything because it was very special for us both.  Good luck and by the way, MedHelp has a breast feeding community that exclusively talks about this subject!  
1 Comments
Haha my mother in law is the same, was shocked when we told her I was expecting and said don't get your hopes up, I'm now 23 weeks gone and shes always touching my belly without asking and it's getting on my nerves! My mum (anti-breastfeeding) used to comment on the allergy side years ago saying my cousin is allergic to eggs etc because he was breastfed, he doesn't have anywhere near the number of health conditions I have and I was bottle fed all the way lol her logic doesn't make sense surely I should be healthy ;)
Avatar universal
The very best advice I can give is don't give up it WILL get better. Some women things go well for from day one. I had a very very rough start to it but I was 100% dedicated got through it and breastfed for 1 year and am so so so happy I did. I'm sorry you and your husband have family that haven't supportive that's awful, but the only one you need to support you is your husband. Also see if your hospital has a lactation consultant and use them! They helped me out enormously. I hope everything works out for you and you can show those nay sayers how to get it done.
1 Comments
Thank you :) I am so bloody determined that it really does take a lot for me to give up whereas husband would give in a lot sooner for a quiet life lol
1827365 tn?1410506306
I had my second baby 3 months ago. I am breastfeeding her and did the same with my first one. I've read all the messages left and don't have much left to say..
beware of headaches! It's common the first days. My head used to hurt so badly at the beginning.. Tylenol wouldn't work. Drink lots of water, do some stretching of your neck and upper back.
For me, the best position to nurse my baby is laying down. You have your arms free, you can rest (or even take a nap while she is latched), baby's mouth is just the right angle, so the chances of getting cracks are less.
Another tip, if you get cracks (hope you don't), you can pump and bottle feed your baby with your own milk so your nipples get a rest.

I breastfed my first up to 11 months. So when my second was born I assumed breastfeeding would be as easy as it was with my first. But it was so painful, I got cracks on my nipples, I knew all about positions and angles and blah blah, but I still was in so much pain....  
1 Comments
Thank you - was not expecting headaches and will definitely keep a bottle of water nearby! Feeding whilst lay down sounds good to me I like the idea of that!
287071 tn?1365192513
Talk to the medical staff/nurses in the hospital. Be open to the help/support they give and don't be shy!  I had no idea what to expect when nursing or if I would be able to do it. I took it one day at a time and found a lot of support on this site.  Best of luck!
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