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One month since Fluffy died...
It's been a month today since Fluffy died gently while I held and kissed him, putting an end to his suffering from an aggressive cancer. A month of some of the worst depression, self-doubt, insecurity, loneliness, and grief. Along-side of that were feelings of relief, sweet memories, joy that he was no longer suffering, relief that he was no longer consuming my life 24 hours a day. Acceptance comes and goes, as the two extremes of emotions war with each other.
I'm having a good week, as my roommate brought me along to her conference at Squaw Creek at North Lake Tahoe. I'm sitting at a table in our suite with an at least 100 degreee view of the valley and surrounding pine covered foothills and higher mountains with lingering snow. Nearly floor to ceiling windows all around, and in the bedroom, too. It's easy to feel better with all this beauty surrounding me.
I broke a toe on the bathroom's marble countertop (misjudged and kicked it when trying to put my foot on top, lol). Still, later that day I hiked a mile (500 ft.decent) down to Lake Tahoe at Eagle Falls and cooled my feet in the lake, I saw the beautiful old Vikingsholm there on Emerald Bay nestled in Pines and cedars, with a clear view of Fannette Island, the only true island in Lake Tahoe. I enjoyed the company of Douglas squirrels, ground squirrels, and some cheeky blue jays. The hike back up was painful and breathtaking in more ways than one.
We stopped a little farther up the road, and saw the trail we'd hiked as well as an incredible view. My roommate spotted a Bald Eagle sitting on an old snag, and we zoomed in with her camera and took several pictures.
The next day we rode a cable car to High Camp (8200 ft.) and went for a one mile hike through meadows of wildflowers, breathing deeply of lightly pine-scented fresh mountain air, then had lunch with a view of a pool and the mountains. I yearned to take a trail down to Shirley Lake, but knew my toe (and the rest of my body, lol) couldn't take it.
Each day I'd find Fluffy hair on my clothes, each day I'd look at his picture on my phone, each day I'd think of calling and talking to my catsitter. I think I will, today, since she's still my friend and I've called her from everywhere I've gone for years (except Canada and Mexico).
I head back home on Sunday, and wonder how that will feel. I know that I'll get another cat someday, but not now, not to fill the hole left by Fluffy's passing.
I'll always be a cat person; a member of the Cat Community. Thank you all for being here.
I'm having a good week, as my roommate brought me along to her conference at Squaw Creek at North Lake Tahoe. I'm sitting at a table in our suite with an at least 100 degreee view of the valley and surrounding pine covered foothills and higher mountains with lingering snow. Nearly floor to ceiling windows all around, and in the bedroom, too. It's easy to feel better with all this beauty surrounding me.
I broke a toe on the bathroom's marble countertop (misjudged and kicked it when trying to put my foot on top, lol). Still, later that day I hiked a mile (500 ft.decent) down to Lake Tahoe at Eagle Falls and cooled my feet in the lake, I saw the beautiful old Vikingsholm there on Emerald Bay nestled in Pines and cedars, with a clear view of Fannette Island, the only true island in Lake Tahoe. I enjoyed the company of Douglas squirrels, ground squirrels, and some cheeky blue jays. The hike back up was painful and breathtaking in more ways than one.
We stopped a little farther up the road, and saw the trail we'd hiked as well as an incredible view. My roommate spotted a Bald Eagle sitting on an old snag, and we zoomed in with her camera and took several pictures.
The next day we rode a cable car to High Camp (8200 ft.) and went for a one mile hike through meadows of wildflowers, breathing deeply of lightly pine-scented fresh mountain air, then had lunch with a view of a pool and the mountains. I yearned to take a trail down to Shirley Lake, but knew my toe (and the rest of my body, lol) couldn't take it.
Each day I'd find Fluffy hair on my clothes, each day I'd look at his picture on my phone, each day I'd think of calling and talking to my catsitter. I think I will, today, since she's still my friend and I've called her from everywhere I've gone for years (except Canada and Mexico).
I head back home on Sunday, and wonder how that will feel. I know that I'll get another cat someday, but not now, not to fill the hole left by Fluffy's passing.
I'll always be a cat person; a member of the Cat Community. Thank you all for being here.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi K, your trip sounds rejuvenating (except for the broken toe part.) I'm sure it was hard to come home to an empty house.
You'll know when it's time for another cat - the opportunity will just present itself when the time is right.
Love and Hugs...♥
You'll know when it's time for another cat - the opportunity will just present itself when the time is right.
Love and Hugs...♥
No cat will ever be able to replace Fluffy but I hope some day you can find a kitty to share your love with. They would be one lucky kitty to have you for an owner!
I know how hard that first year can be after losing a pet. I can't believe it's been over a year now since I lost Willow.
God bless you and little Fluffy. Please stay in touch. Hugs and prayers.
I know how hard that first year can be after losing a pet. I can't believe it's been over a year now since I lost Willow.
God bless you and little Fluffy. Please stay in touch. Hugs and prayers.
I still keep pictures of the cats I had growing up. I miss them! The 2 cats we have right now help with that. I know they won't always be here and I know we'll have to get some more when they pass on. I think it's a good idea to find another kitty to love and provide a new home to. There are so many homeless kitties out there that would be thrilled to have a mommy like Fluffy had. When you are ready I hope you find a great cat!
I came across a baby picture of my Masena a couple of weeks ago before we came down here to Gulfport where I do not know a soul, and I think I'll post that picture when I get back home to Tx. I miss my cats and dogs and home. I think in time you will want to hear the pitter-patter of little cat feet again. I do have a few....but i don't think I could ever be without one. I feel so very lonely here without them.
Has it really been a month?? It seemed like last week, no offence...
But I bet he had the time of his life when he was with you though...
The happiest cat around I bet...
'Don't Cry Because It's Over, Smile Because It Happened.'
He's smiling because it happened, he's smiling because he had the best lif ever, and tbh if he was with anyone else he wouldnt of been as happy as he was with you.
He wants you to smile and be happy because he loved you and you loved him, and he is always going to be around. ALWAYS!
Like there might be a bird or something who is always in your garden or always around... exactly the same bird, That bird is actually your Fluffy....
I am sorry you're feeling so down, but 'Have Hope, Things Get Better'
xx
But I bet he had the time of his life when he was with you though...
The happiest cat around I bet...
'Don't Cry Because It's Over, Smile Because It Happened.'
He's smiling because it happened, he's smiling because he had the best lif ever, and tbh if he was with anyone else he wouldnt of been as happy as he was with you.
He wants you to smile and be happy because he loved you and you loved him, and he is always going to be around. ALWAYS!
Like there might be a bird or something who is always in your garden or always around... exactly the same bird, That bird is actually your Fluffy....
I am sorry you're feeling so down, but 'Have Hope, Things Get Better'
xx
I'm still finding pictures I forgot Anita and I took of Queen Victoria, Calamity Jane, Dancer and Cerridwen...memories rush to the surface...
Our little friends are never, truly gone, save when we pass-on and the stories we tell of them are forgotten by others.
Heck, my little cat Tuna has been gone since 1994 (she lived a good 16 years) and her memory is fresh when her name is mentioned within my family and circle of close friends...
Fluffy lives!
Our little friends are never, truly gone, save when we pass-on and the stories we tell of them are forgotten by others.
Heck, my little cat Tuna has been gone since 1994 (she lived a good 16 years) and her memory is fresh when her name is mentioned within my family and circle of close friends...
Fluffy lives!
One month already....seems like yesterday doesn't it.
You have experienced all the emotions of loosing a best friend, now comes acceptance....Fluffy will always be in your heart and ours.
Of course you are and always will be a member of the 'cat community', your knowledge and compassion is so valuable here.
AND one day when you are ready(and you'll know when)..some little creature will again crawl up into your heart and you won't be able to resist.
The vacation sounds wonderful, the description makes me feel like I can see it thru your eyes....enjoy, and welcome home tomorrow. Will be quiet at your house and hard to return.!!
hugs.
You have experienced all the emotions of loosing a best friend, now comes acceptance....Fluffy will always be in your heart and ours.
Of course you are and always will be a member of the 'cat community', your knowledge and compassion is so valuable here.
AND one day when you are ready(and you'll know when)..some little creature will again crawl up into your heart and you won't be able to resist.
The vacation sounds wonderful, the description makes me feel like I can see it thru your eyes....enjoy, and welcome home tomorrow. Will be quiet at your house and hard to return.!!
hugs.
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