Bummed but whatever

[tink_0427]

So I was hoping to return to work on 12/3, had it marked in my calendar and was starting to (mentally) prepare myself. Then I talked to my physical therapist who said I wasn't ready yet (GRRR) and I wouldn't be done with PT prior to the 3rd. She suggested contacting my doctor and asking him what he recommended.
So I did and apparently so did she (double GRRR) so now doctor doesn't want me returning to work in the 3rd and wants me to finish my PT and then come see him and at that time he will  see if I can come back to work or whether I need more PT.
So I have a drs appointment on the 19th and he has extended my off work order through that day. He took the 'return to work' off of my off work order so in order to go back to work I have to be seen for either another extension or a return to work order for 20th.
I know it's for the best and like my mom says 'you had brain surgery, Jennifer, they can't just put a bandage on it and be done' but I think because I had that date and now I don't its more frustrating than anything!! December 10th will be 5 months since my surgery...and to think I was hoping to be back at work in 8 weeks...pfffffffft...see how well that worked out, huh?

[selmaS]

  Glad that ur job is protected like that...u r very lucky to have one like that....


  @ Viv- I know what u mean to invest time into something and not be able to use it  is devastating... but u never know at some point u may feel better and find a way to utilize it : )

[Viva001]

My point was not that I have a Master's degree that I earned at midlife, but that not being able to utilize it was devastating.

[tink_0427]

I feel the same way...miss work, miss my co-workers!!
Selma - yes my job is held and protected; thankfully!!

[padrssuck]

I have been thinking a lot about work lately. I miss it. And my co-workers. I've decided that if this specialist cant help me(i should be hearing from them tomorrow), Im done and going back to work. Im exhausted all day, but thats not going to change. This is my slow season at work, and although Im not ready to go back physically, i need to.

[selmaS]

  Hi ...good to know u have $$ and can have more time if needed.....

So does the union hold ur position just like FMLA?...

That is good ur desk is set up like that...so u may be able to back....

I have found that the neck exercises really did help, more so then I thought when I first started them...

[tink_0427]

@ Viv - I got my Masters a month and 20 days before I had my youngest son, while working FT, I was 33...I think there's something to say for us 'older' students...makes the determination stronger...u want it more, more dedicated! I always joke a kid ad a degree for me...the first one it was my AA, after my second my BS, then my third one my Masters right before...again reinforcing the insanely craziness that is my life! About dropping in, I love all of you...u had gotten me through SO much!!! I'll still be around, even when life starts getting normal :)
Selma - I'm out of FMLA. I am in State Disability and because of the way the quarters work Im taking home like the same I would (I'm subtracting the $100 I spend a week in gas going to work) if I was working. So the $ isn't the issue and as far as my job, since I am union, I have a year of medical leave I can take after I am off payroll with my work (which I am not yet). So I'm good to take the time, just frustrating to not know when I'll be back! Yeah my PT have me a lot of exercises to do at home and some stretches which help a lot! My desk at work is all ergonomically set up so Im good in that department as well! Now to be released...lol

[selmaS]

  Well u can work those neck muscles at home with the neck exercises...I know my neck is stronger and I still do them...started in the hospital. DO u have ne FMLA time left? if so, use it to go back slowly and part time ...that way u get full time pay if u still have sick paid time coming....other wise, it is just part time until ur time for FMLA runs out....but that is one way to try it.

Oh and make sure ur computer monitor is at eye level...it will help ur neck big time : )

[Viva001]

I hope you drop in occasionally to tell us how you're doing, after you return to life.  In the meantime, play!  :-)

Btw, I got sick the month before I graduated w/my Master's degree--@ 45, as a single parent.  It's astounding what you cope with, when you have to.  I can't even think about what might have been.

[tink_0427]

@Selma - that is my fear, that I go back to work and I'm not ready and I end up relying on all the pain meds like before the surgery...then it's like why did I even have the surgery in the first place!!!
I do office/desk work. Nothing physical (I've ensured that with my degrees...lol), computer all day, phones all day, I work in the healthcare industry...for Kaiser, a huge health insurance and health provider out here in California. I work in the insurance end though not providing medical care. The main concern is working 8 hours and not having 'bowling ball head' as I call it. My neck muscles just aren't quite up to par yet. I guess we shall see how it goes post PT and at my NS appointment on the 19th...only time will tell
Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and hope not to trip...

[tink_0427]

@ Viv...ur 'success story' brought a tear to my eye...thank you...I've always been one to define myself based on what I have achieved...my kids, my family, my education, my work...I guess I never thought to add 'I made it through 35 years of having Chiari, had surgery and Im doing pretty darn good afterward' to the list. Gives me another perspective! :) As far as full recovery, I'm hoping I am on the right path...I feel much better and on 17th see my Neurologist about possibly coming off my Depakote that I have been taking for my headaches - main reason I opted for surgery so I wasn't relying in meds - so I'm optimistic about that! Baby steps...to a healthier me!! I'm not so sure about factors...as u know I probably did too much, too soon post surgery but that's always been me!!! I can't sit idle for too long (the saying 'idle hands are the devil's playthings' I seriously think is a direct correlation to me) I go nutts!! Was there things that I just couldn't do, yes, but if I could do it, I did it...I thought I was gonna be down a lot longer immediately post-surgery in the hospital but 48 hours later I was released from the hospital and started working toward getting back to me and the busy bee I had always been!  
Ablut work, unfortunately, my actual position isn't one available from home (boo...hiss), but truth be told, I don't know if I could work from home...I mean I CAN but it would be difficult! With kids and the DH and the housework and the laundry...OYE, I always say I work to get a break from it all...lol! I think I'm just going a bit stir crazy is all.
Thank you Linda for the encouragement! I applaud u for being able to hear that u can never work and still being able to pick up ur boot straps and keep in keeping on...I don't know what I would do should I hear that...shiver at the thought! One day at a time is all u can do.

[selmaS]

  The thing is if u were to rush back u could have set backs...and the question then would be do u want another surgery?...NO?,,, then listen, accept it and make the best of it, .....rest up and do not over do it as that will delay it too...listen to ur body....

  What type of work do u do? I never got to go back, so do, some don't....but, it is all in how u approach it too....relax, accept it and rest : )

[linnielou232]

I am just thankful that your listening to your Dr. and PH.  I know how this feeling is.  I had plans too and it never worked out for me.  My NS told me I can no longer work.  I have come to except this, but it was a difficult one for me.  Do listen to your PT and Dr.  they do know what is best for you even though we don't think so at the time.  I also learned through my recovery not to set myself up for disappointment.  I was as you and had the dates and everything worked out on the calendar and it didn't work out the way I planned.  Take one day at a time.  Best of luck with the day's ahead.  All will work out for the best for you.  
Linda :)

[Viva001]

Mom is right.  :-). It does seem a bit overprotective though, if work is what you want & need.
You have really been through a lot since surgery.
I'm so happy for you that you feel UP to working.  What better Thanksgiving could you possibly have, you & whole family all patched up successfully & raring to go!
You can't work at home?

I wish we knew more about the successful surgeries like yours.  I would really like to know what % achieve full recovery.  Selma always mentions that they leave this site--& I dont blame them one bit--but I would like to know what, if any, factors are involved.  Or is it just all in the cards?!