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Learning how to deal with the emotions from Chiari Surgery

New to the forum.
Nearly 3 years since surgery.
I'm searching for answers on why I experience severe anxiety and extreme irritability along with depression and anger outburst. Did I exchange one issue for another? I always ask my Nuero team was it worth it, obviously they tell me it had to be done, which I tend to agree, but just like being reassured. Father of three, 7, 5, and 3, they are watching their dad self-destruct and seeing me at my worst.  The VA thinks its a lot to do with PTSD, I seem to disagree with that, because I was able to manage it for the whole time until post surgery. It feels like after surgery it has opened a box and I have to re-learn how to learn how to deal with every emotion all over again along with who I'm becoming each day. Reading these post makes me feel like I'm not alone and there is hope to get better. I speak to the medical teams on learning how to re-wire everything and I do feel like there may be hope. I cannot go on watching and living everyday seeing how upset the kids are when I go into these dark moods. I truly feel like this is from surgery. I understand we have to have these surgeries done to live a more comfortable life, but how we get better and learn to handle the new normal, is not yet provided for us from our Nuero Teams and Providers. I'm 31 years old and I don't want this to be my story until the end. I want to learn to get better on dealing with these high emotion. I lived a life so for with high emotions, but now it seems to have taken over and i look to other patients now to see how they have managed. Thanks again, for reading my rant, I'm open to most all suggestions or thoughts.
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620923 tn?1452915648
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi Joe and welcome to the Chiari forum,

How long ago was your decompression surgery? And what all was done ? Did they open the dura, and did you get a patch?

Just having a surgery, doesn't mean it will resolve issues you have or had prior or won't get things after....some have developed epilepsy post op....not saying you will but it is something that has happened.

What other conditions and issues did you have before surgery? What were your symptoms from Chiari? All of these will play a role in how you heal and how long it will take for you to heal.....

I had surgery in '09 and I was still dealing with the surgical site for over a  year...and symptoms for a few years after...12 years later, I am doing well....so much better then the first couple of years post op....BUT I do have other related conditions that played into my recovery, and that is why I asked you about yours.

Surgery is not like flipping a switch and we will see immediate benefits....some times it takes longer than we would like.

Hang in there and do look at other related conditions you might have had or currently have.
Helpful - 0
992677 tn?1537668903
Your words carry a lot of emotion. Frankly, I didn’t read a rant. No, our mind is a powerful thing and that can be good and bad. We can use it to tune our thinking so as to not allow ourselves to feel the full effects our condition is having on our body. We can condition our minds thinking so as to allow our body to accept such a serious surgery. Our mind can accept that the surgery is a must and so we move on. Our mind is protecting us from things we can’t handle just as a parent might in some situations protect their children from worry.

If you think about your own story just how much stress have you had to deal with due to CM? Symptoms leading to a dx are stress enough yet many here have had to fight just to find a doctor that hears more than two words out of your mouth. Then to find one who also understands how CM makes the patient feel… yeah good luck. Those are even scarcer to find. Etc, etc, etc, point being everything about your CM has the potential to bring you additional stress that sometimes we may not recognize at the time. Our mind eventually has to deal with all that stress. And as my original NS put it to me - In so many words his impression was that due to the extreme compression on the brain stem for so long we should expect to feel abnormal levels of anxiety. I didn’t totally understand him but what I got was that our mind has been stressed for so long due to that compression that it could take years for the mind to accept all is well. True or not???? I do not know but what I do know is that in my case it has proven to be true.

That said my original surgery was Sept 2009. The anxiety has been ridiculously over active at times. I can say though it is far less now than it was say 5 years ago. Doctors never found anything to help in my case. Teaching your mind to recognize what you are feeling before it gets bad is key. IMHO. In my case I did find an alternative medicine source that makes a world of difference in this area as well.

Retarded HA atm from this dumb storms going though so hope that makes sense.
Chill and enjoy those kids. IMO you can’t be too honest with your child. Couldn’t tell you how many times I’ve apologized to my kids. Learning why their parent, mom or dad is acting in a way that they can’t understand can do wonders for their confidence. JMHO

Take Care
CW
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
This sounds a whole lot like me after my surgery.  Are you on any neurological meds?  The reason I ask is because I fully believe that is what caused these types of symptoms in me.  I was put on Neurontin, Cymbalta, and Lyrica (not at the same time).  I lost every emotion I had, except anger.  And that is out of character for me.  Although I knew I loved my family, I did not feel the emotion of love. Nor happiness, or excitement,  or any good thing.  I finally realized that I had a real problem when I had absolutely no tears during my step brother's funeral.  I took myself off the medicine, but it took about a year for my emotions to come back fully.  I know this may not be your issue, but I hope it helps you to know that others have been where you are.  Only God and the love of my family kept me from losing it altogether.  I hope and pray the best for your complete recovery.
Helpful - 0
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