Avatar universal

10yr old son always gets up and comes into our bed

This start about 4months ago, he goes in his own bed and goes to sleep as normal around 930pm no problems but he gets up around 1/2am and comes into ours, we've tried everything, from putting him back several times a night, talking to him, bribeing him with more pocket money, he's always got an excuse like chimes outside, he can hear the dog, but his favorite seems to be the mattress is uncomfy ...

The only thing we can think of is the lady down the street had an attempted burgler, where there was a man & woman working together, and of course kids add bits on and he's heard something thats frightened him, not that he's admitted this but it seems to have started around the same time so thats all we can think of, we have asked him if anything frightens him and he swears not.

We have 2 spare rooms so offered to move him but he doesn't want to, so yeah we've tried everything and are now at a loss as to what to do!

Just to add as a toddler he had sleeping problems, he did stop breathing in his sleep on a nightly basis (he doesn't no this, he thinks he had an "snotty" nose & earache) due to a problem with his adenoids, tonsils etc which he had an operation for just before he was 4 and then everything settled down and for 6yrs no problems

Any help as to where we go from here would appreciated x
4 Responses
377493 tn?1356502149
It does sound like something has frightened him. It could be anything from something he has seen on TV to something he has heard from friends. Yes, the burglars probably could have done it.  

Honestly, I would probably just ask him in a very non confrontational way.  Just casually ask him if something is bothering him or if he is worried about anything.  He is looking for comfort and security from the two of you, so getting to the bottom of what has upset him is the answer.  And he is old enough to tell you as long as he is not made to feel embarrassed or ashamed of it.  Best of luck.
757137 tn?1347196453
It is natural for children to have the occasional nightmare, and sometimes to develop a fear that is more or less based on reality. If he is not your only child it might help to double him up with a sibling. I had four children and it seemed more comforting to them to share bedrooms.

But even so, I do remember a tap tap tap on the wrist in the middle of the night, and lifting up one of the kiddies to sleep between my husband and me. It's the price of parenthood. They do grow up, you know, and, believe it or not, you get to miss the tap tap tap.
Avatar universal
Thanks, unfortunately he is an only child, definately think somethings frightened him its just getting him to open up, which he normally does (a bit too much sometimes) but with this he seems to have clammed up. We'll keep trying, thanks for your help x
1006035 tn?1485575897
Here's a few things I would do. Tell him he can sleep with you every other night. That way you aren't just saying "no." If his mattress is uncomfortable can you get him another one? Maybe even get him a loft bed. Sometimes kids feel more safe being off the ground. I would also get him a nightlight and small tv or radio. Do you have any pets? Perhaps a dog or cat sleeping next to him would make him feel safer.
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