Sexual and behavioral problems with 9yr old girl

[Nate91811]

Hi I have a 9 and a half yr old step-daughter who is masturbating! It first started while she was out of state at her aunts! She got caught showing her 3yr old cousin how to do it! The worst part is she is actually inserting her fingers and having an orgasim! We thought she stopped but in the last wk she got caught doing it in the back seat of my car, while laying in bed with a relative watching a movie and NOW at SCHOOL!?!?!? Please help I've heard "humping" around age 3-4 is normal but is full blown masturbation?!?! She has ADHD and behavioral problems!!! She's very very sneaky, lies about everything and anything!!! She's a good manipulator! Acts like she's 5 and has different ways to act with each person she is around!!!! You can tell her not to do something and walks away does it anyway then plays stupid and says I don't know when you ask her ANYTHING!!!! I'm just tired and sad!!! Need help

[Nate91811]

She said she seen her mom and boyfriend touch each other and says no one has ever done it to her! She just makes me nervous bc she has done It to others and I have a 16month old boy which she is to interested in and have caught her taking his diaper off!!!! And other things! She is very manipulative lies has no feeling of remorse EVER has killed frogs by gutting them!! She makes up stories and tried to act like she is 4 I'm just scared at this point! She has progressively gotten worse each yr

[Mary_996]

I started masterbating around 10. I am fine and I don't sleep around but she has to be taught to do it in private and away from others. She can do it if she wants but talk to her about it. Don't just get angry because you weren't the same. Explain to her what's happening and why she should be careful.

[stephcody]

First find out who molested her, who taught her this, take her to a therapist...She probably feels okay about it, but there gots to be more to her story. 9 or not she should not be masturbating like that...It is uncalled for, and she must have picked it up from someone...This girl has been taken advantage of, and the way i see it you have to start backwards...What i mean is figure out what happen as she was growing up, who was around her, how did it get the way it is ...And some tough love always works. Good luck

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

The masturbation can be addressed by letting her know that it must occur in private, not with otgher people or in any public setting. So the focus, in other words, is not on the masturbation per se, but on the context in which it occurs.

Relative to your other concerns, these invite an evaluation by a pediatric mental health professional, such as clinical psychologist or clinical social worker.