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Avatar universal

5 year daughter and her friend playing doctors and nurses

Hi, I'm after some advice and reassurance that I tackled the situation the right way.
Today, my daughter who is 5 had her friend (girl) over to play. Whilst checking on them I found my daughter under her covers. I could tell that the 2 were very embarrassed to get caught out so I didn't make a big deal out of it. I asked what they were doing and they said playing doctors. (My daughter had her Dr's set under the covers too) I asked them to not play under the covers as it was too hot. I had clicked on that the friend was trying to pull her trousers up. I left it as that.
The friend went home.
I later asked my daughter what she was doing, she told me that her friend had no knickers on and she was trying to get her baby out. She did get upset, I explained that I wasn't angry with her but that those areas are very private and that nobody has the right to touch or look at them. Did I say the right thing? Do I need to be worried?
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Avatar universal
Wisebird, when I was 5 or 6 I explored similarly with my friends.  I was never sexually molested or verbally/physically sexually abused.  It's just curiosity.  My daughter and her friend were also caught a year ago over to her friends house.  They apparently had come Accross baby videos on YouTube and that sparked their curiosity on the woman's body and how babies are made.  Talk to her, make sure she knows she's not in trouble, and then reassure her that she can always come to you to talk about these things.  Make sure the other mother/parent doesn't over react either.  It was my daughter's best friend and in my situation it was a couple kids from daycare.  I'm a perfectly healthy mom of 3 and happy. My kids are always comfortable talking with me because I reassure them that I too was their age.  I understand how they feel. I don't overreact.  I think you did a wonderful job talking to her.  Fivesies to you.  Your an amazing mama.  :)
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Avatar universal
You do know that 'playing doctors' is what children who've been molested do? Where would a child get the idea that doctors examine your genitals. At least one of these kids is being preyed on.
Helpful - 0
2 Comments
Omg I played doctor And other things I was never molested I was curious again all kids experiment that's crazy to say every kid that plays doctor or experiments with anything sexual has been molested I'm sure some have but there are a lot more signs then just that and that for a therapist and professionals to decide
I also remember clearly that the doctor checked my genitals with my basic check ups baby girls get yeast infections and can get other infections and yes without being molested I remember very well so I'm sure that other children could very easily get the idea that doctors do touch there genitals so for you to say that is unnecessarily scaring these parents they need a professional that talks to the child to make that call  
19740770 tn?1483557078
The other little girl (your daughters friend) seems to have learned about pregnancy and how the operation works. I do not believe that they were being sexual at all, simply playing doctor and nurse- unaware that it was inappropriate. Its good you established to her that her genitals are private and that no one is allowed to mess with her. Just keep reinforcing the idea that if anyone touches her she must report to you immediately. Keep an eye on her and make sure she isnt teaching other children or trying to do it again. Good luck ! :)
Helpful - 0
19740770 tn?1483557078
The other little girl (your daughters friend) seems to have learned about pregnancy and how the operation works. I do not believe that they were being sexual at all, simply playing doctor and nurse- unaware that it was inappropriate. Its good you established to her that her genitals are private and that no one is allowed to mess with her. Just keep reinforcing the idea that if anyone touches her she must report to you immediately. Keep an eye on her and make sure she isnt teaching other children or trying to do it again. Good luck ! :)
Helpful - 0
973741 tn?1342342773
Sounds on track to me.  I definitely think setting boundaries is good such as you did---  no touching or looking at your privates and same goes for her toward others.  And make sure they leave the door open when playing and check on them frequently.  good luck
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thank you for the reassurance
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I think that you handled it perfectly! No need to worry unless it happens more than once (or escalates) in which case ask where she learned it.

Wish you the best of luck!
Helpful - 0
1 Comments
Yep, I agree with APthree.  kids are curious and you handled this well.
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