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Avatar universal

7 year old child is out of control

My 7 year old daughter is out of control, she does not listen to what she has been told to do, constantly talking back mimicing me, trying to get her sibling to do stuff that is not right. Lying giving me a hard time about everything, when is told to something she says "NO" or if she is told "NO" that she can't do something then she constantly bugs to do it and has a fit. Takes off in stores, ahe will not do her punishment for mis-behaviour like go to her room after school until dinner. She has no remorse for mis behaving. This has been a battle since she was 2 yrs old. I don't know what to do anymore, she knows what buttons to push to upset me.Does not listen to instructions, if asked to do something she will do the opposite or do what she wants, taking stuff away does not work.She is constantly arguing with me about everything. Please give me some suggestions.

Brig 1975
165 Responses
Avatar universal
THIS MAY NOT BE WHAT EVERYONE ELSE WILL AGREE WITH.  OK!!!  MY BROTHER WAS THE SAME WAY GROWING UP, AND HE DROVE MY PARENTS CRAZY,  THEY TRIED THE GROUNDING THING, TAKING STUFF AWAY, TIME-OUTS, NO TV. YOU NAME THEY TRIED IT.  SO THEY STARTED WHIPPING HIM AND IT STOPPED.  MY POINT IS SOME CHILDREN ARE BRAVER THAN OTHERS AND LIKE TO SEE IF YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO PUNISH THEM. I DON'T ALWAYS AGREE WITH WHIPPINGS (IVE NEVER HAD TOO)  BUT IF IT GOT TO THE POINT WHERE MY KID WERE TESTING ME LIKE I WAS A CHILD THAT WOULD BE A GROUNDS FOR A WHIPPING.
2 Comments
What happens when spanking on the butt does not  work or faze them and make him more aggressive???
You stop doing, because it quits being a punishment to teach them a lesson and becomes a beating you deliver to relieve your frustration.  Once you start down that road  walking it becomes easier to justify and tuning back so much harder to do.
184674 tn?1360864093
This is what I wrote in the post above yours ("problem children"), and it goes along with what Emmaboo says about spankings/whippings.

"I'm an advocate for spanking, used as a *deterrant* for behavior; meaning don't spank when the child is well into bad behavior. Spanking at the first sign of bad behavior usually puts an abrupt halt to the behavior, because it's somewhat shocking to a kid that they didn't get away with much of anything before you stepped in in the most authoritative way possible--by inflicting pain. Do not spank in front of other kids. It should be a personal correction between you and that child. Also, I believe spankings should *only* be on the butt, *never* on bare skin, and *never* used as humiliation (i.e. in front of people/friends/family or in public). As I said, it's a personal correction between you and the child."

As Emmaboo said, some kids are indeed braver and far less compliant than others and push and push to see just how much they can get away with. Sometimes the only thing that gets their attention is pain, as difficult as it may be for the parent to be the one to inflict it. But I see it this way--it's quick, not harmful if used and done *correctly,* it gets their attention, it's a learning experience, and you're the one in control instead of the child.

That's just my opinion, and one of my methods for disciplining my own child, who is extremely well-behaved, not at all aggressive, and a very happy, polite and affectionate little boy (in other words, spankings have not psychologically scarred him or made him an angry and aggressive child, because I don't abuse my authority and I don't overuse spankings with all bad behavior).
Avatar universal
MY SON IS SEVEN HE IS ALSO ADHD HE TAKES MED FOR IT BUT IT ONLY LAST MAYBE THREE HOURS WHEN ITS SUPPOSE TO BE  AT LEAST EIGHT. WE HAVE CHANGE IT SO MANY TIMES AND NOTHING SEEMS TO WORK. ALSO HE HAS A SEVERE ANGER PROBLEM HE FEELS HE CAN DO AS HE PLEASE WHEN HE PLEASE, WELL IM THE TYPE OF PARENT THAT THINGS LIKE THAT DONT WORK FOR ME, I FEEL A CHILD NEEDS TO STAY IN A CHILD PLACE. THINGS HAS GOTTEN TO THE POINT EVEN THOUGH HE MAKES A'S & B'S IN SCHOOL HE WAS RECENTLY PUT OUT FOR THROUGHING FITS AND ANYTHING ELSE HE CAN GET HIS HAND ON ALONG WITH FIGHTING TEACHERS IF HE DOESNT GET  HIS WAY SOMETIME ITS LIL THINGS LIKE A KID CUT IN LINE AND INSTEAD OF HIM TELLING THE TEACHER WHATS WRONG WHEN ASK HE JUST GO OFF SO I HAVE TO GO PICK HIM UP CAUSE HE IS OUT OF CONTROL THE THING THAT GET ME IS HE TRIES THIS AT HOME WITH ME AND GET PUNISH I EVEN TRIED SPANKING HIM IT DOESNT EVEN MATTER TO HIM WHEN I REMOVE HIS TOYS IF I FORGET SOMETHING HE'LL SAY HERE YOU FORGOT THIS YOU KNOW IM PUNISH AND THEN LAUGH. BUT WHEN HE IS AT HIS DAD HE NEVER ACTS OUT HE IS LIKE A NORMAL KID HIS DAD NEVER HAS TO PUNISH HIM OR ANYTHING. FOR SOME REASON HE JUST HAVE THIS FEAR WITH HIM AND WILL NOT BE DISRESPECTFULL EVERY THING IS YES SIR NO SIR AND HE GO OFF AND PLAY WITH HIS BROTHER AND SISTER. HIS DADS OTHER TOO KIDS. HE IS THE ONLY ONE I HAVE. HIS DAD TALKS TO HIM ABOUT HIS BEHAVIOR AT HOME WITH ME.  HE'LL SAY HELL BE GOOD BUT THE MINUTE WE LEAVE HE IS BACK AT IT AGAIN. I CANT SEE MYSELF GIVING MY SON TO HIM. SO WHAT DO I DO? TO BE HONEST I REALLY DONT BELIEVE HE IS ADHD CAUSE HE DONT TAKE NO MED AT HIS DAD HE REFUSE TO GIVE IT TO HIM AND HE DOESNT HAVE ANY PROBLEMS. CAN SOME ONE PLEASE HELP ME IM SO STRESS THAT IM HAVING MIGRAINES EVERY NIGHT HOW CAN I HELP GET MY SON IN LINE?
1 Comments
My step son is the exact same way and we are at an absolute loss of what to do! Nothing works! Spanking, yelling, calmly talking, taking things away, grounding. NOTHING! He will never apologize for anything he does and when he does, we can tell he really doesn't mean it. He has no remorse for anything he does. He is a distraction at school and he is the mean kid at school that none of the other kids want to play with. It's always his way or he throws a huge fit, even when he knows that's now how it works at our house and he was not raised to be this way! He is so entitled and thinks the world owes him something. He will glare at me to a point where I am afraid he is plotting to murder me (not joking). The second my husband tells him to do something, he does it. Not for me though. He takes no directions from women and will not think women are  the same as men whatsoever. He is the rudest, most disrespectful child. I will never understand what I need to do to change him.
Avatar universal
My daughter is 7 years old.  At three years of age its like something went off in her like a time bomb.  Then when she got into school it got better.  She is a very smart loving girl on her terms..  I have tried spanking her, taking her toys away, grounding her from playing with friends, she has no remorse and doesnt care what happens.  As of late she has being showing her 4 year old sister to behave badly as well.  I am at my wits end with her.  I need something or someone to help me.  She has also been "experimenting"(sexually) with her older brother.  It was getting so bad that I called Child Protection Services on her to try and fix it...But then I make love to my husband and find out she is watching us fron a hole in wall from the other room (the hole the cable line goes through the rooms)  I am begging for help !  Please im at my wits end help me someone!  If you hav anything you can add my e mail address is ***@****  
Avatar universal
I have the same problem my  7 year old has been out of control since she was 2 years old will not listen to me at all no matter what I do ( out side the home every one and I mean every one says that she is the sweetest best acting little girl around everyone loves her to death) no one understands that this child is out of CONTROL! she takes things from little kids gets them to GIVE the stuff to her and they think they have given her a present she is starting to get her younger sister to act just like her in many ways I have no idea what to do I ground her spank her she screams at the top of her lungs for hours at a time no one in the family can stand to be around not even me I have  started to hate my own child and not want to even be around her at all
Avatar universal
I just beat the **** out of them.









KIDDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  But sometimes I would REALLY like to.

SOMEBODY had to say it.

I tell my child to put his nose on the wall. It works surprisingly well.
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