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9 year old son obsessed with discussing sex/admitting wrongdoings
My son, for about a week now, has become obsessed with talking to me (and at times, my wife) about sex and admitting things he has done wrong in the past. Not sure if the two are related.
The sexual discussions typically revolve around his guilt about looking at women's breasts, and thinking about having "sex" with various people. I have stopped short of the full-blown sex talk, but have discussed with him that sex is something that two married adults do that is beautiful and intimate. I might add that 7 months ago he walked in on my wife and I through a locked door that was not totally closed. At that time and the day after, I did my best to address any questions he had, but he seemed to want to avoid it. It has not been an incident that I noticed since.
Additionally, I have been getting 5-6 "confessions" a day about anything from "I think I said the "F" word by accident when I was 6, to "when C (sister) was crying in the backseat, I said I didn't know what was wrong--but I really took her toy--which happened a year ago", to "one time I got over excited in school and kissed a classmates (male) hand."
He consistantly says that he can't "get these thoughts out of his mind" and that he does not want to go to hell. (on a 10 point scale, our level of religious discussion is about a 4 in our household. We believe and go to church semi-regularly, but I have never told him he was going to hell because of something he has done wrong.)
Part of me wants believes that this is attention-getting, becuase he certainly is getting my attention, part of me believes that the "walking-in" incindent was not handled properly, and part of me believes that there is rooted in a serious problem I have not been able to detect.
We are a "normal" family, mom, dad, son, daughter (3yrs old--requires a lot of attention), middle income, I am in education and mom is a homemaker.
Thanks for any advice you could give. It will be appreciated.
The sexual discussions typically revolve around his guilt about looking at women's breasts, and thinking about having "sex" with various people. I have stopped short of the full-blown sex talk, but have discussed with him that sex is something that two married adults do that is beautiful and intimate. I might add that 7 months ago he walked in on my wife and I through a locked door that was not totally closed. At that time and the day after, I did my best to address any questions he had, but he seemed to want to avoid it. It has not been an incident that I noticed since.
Additionally, I have been getting 5-6 "confessions" a day about anything from "I think I said the "F" word by accident when I was 6, to "when C (sister) was crying in the backseat, I said I didn't know what was wrong--but I really took her toy--which happened a year ago", to "one time I got over excited in school and kissed a classmates (male) hand."
He consistantly says that he can't "get these thoughts out of his mind" and that he does not want to go to hell. (on a 10 point scale, our level of religious discussion is about a 4 in our household. We believe and go to church semi-regularly, but I have never told him he was going to hell because of something he has done wrong.)
Part of me wants believes that this is attention-getting, becuase he certainly is getting my attention, part of me believes that the "walking-in" incindent was not handled properly, and part of me believes that there is rooted in a serious problem I have not been able to detect.
We are a "normal" family, mom, dad, son, daughter (3yrs old--requires a lot of attention), middle income, I am in education and mom is a homemaker.
Thanks for any advice you could give. It will be appreciated.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Be assured your son is not doing this for the attention he might receive. He is tortured by thoughts of what he might have done wrong. Could this be related to the episode when he encountered you and your wife? Perhaps. You could be witnessing the onset of an obsessive-type Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, and you should have your son evaluated. Relative to handling the comments, be very calm and casual, ask him about the spisodes he calls to your attention, but do this in a very matter-of-fact manner.
A related discussion, what is wrong with my nine year old? was started.
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