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Avatar universal

ADD or what???

My son, 5 years old, is having difficulty in school. When my son was 3 we bought him the YBCR series, he learned it right away, and could read at least five of the 10 words within two weeks. He was on the right track, we bought him some leap frog videos so he can learn the sounds of the alphabet, and colors, and shapes: he learned the video within a few days. I am not sure of the time line, but sometime after he learned all of the basics, naming letters and sounds, colors, shapes, etc. he lost it somewhere. We sent him to a summer program the summer before he started kindergarten, when he was asked to do the work he didn't know anything. We are almost done with the school year, and he has no interest in learning most of the material. He has a hard time focusing, his head will be facing the teacher or myself, but his eyes are constantly wandering. We practically have a preschool in our house with all the supplies we have purchased for him, so he is not lacking in supplies. I have no idea what to do anymore. I doubt that he has ADD, but I have no clue what it could be...
2 Responses
973741 tn?1342346373
Hi.  Well, could he be burned out by all of the learning pressure?  There is a quote on th wall of our school as you walk into the kindergarten hall and it says "A child who comes to kindergarten knowing everything they need to know hasn't spent enough time in the sandbox."  

He's 5 and where someone goes to college won't be determined for years and years.  Relax a little and I do think things will get better.

If your son is still 5 and finishing kindergarten, then he must have been a young child for his class.  This does make a difference.  Developmentally, a child of your son's age can sit and attend for 15 to 20 minutes an activity.  That is why preschool and kindergarten is broken up into a bunch of small, fairly short segments.  I'd guess that your son is within normal range in this area.  Whatever he did at 3, get that out of your mind.  Is his kindergarten teacher concerned?  Is she coming to you and saying that he is not learning or falling far behind academically?  

If it is just you thinking he should be further ahead--------  that you have to fight.  Your son can feel your strong desire and that might backfire.

Story, my oldest son has sensory integration disorder.  This is like add/adhd in many ways in that it involves the nervous system and his 'engine' is on high all the time.  Talk about not knowing if he is listening . . . he is in constant motion.  (truth be told, the kid misses nothing and every teacher he has ever had tests him because they don't think he is listening.  Never do I have a complaint that he doesn't listen to what they say.  He's now 7 and controls the movement a little better but still gives the appearance of being uninterested.  However, he soaks it ALL in.)  The summer between kindergarten and first grade-------  I started a reading  program with him.  I got carried away.  I pushed a little too hard.  By the end of June he refused to read a thing.  The horror.  He would not pick up a book and just said no.  I backed off completely.  So when we met his teacher this past fall, I told her my error.  She laughed.  She started him out at a really low level.  She nor I put any pressure on him whatsoever.  Well, my kid went from that low level to one of the best readers in the class.  He still doesn't want to pick up books all the time but will read his 15 minutes a day and has  progressed out of his grade level.  

My point? Let it happen.  If he doesn't want to read about the body in a book------ take him to a museum that has a section with skeletons and health related material.  Show him and do things with him.  Things like that.  I'm sure you do that but you have to make learning fun.  And heck, you have to just have a lot of fun as these are the early years.  

Now if your son's teacher is coming to you saying there is a problem, please clarify.  That is something further to talk about.  But otherwise, I'd just relax.

PS:  one of the motivating factors for my son was the levels of reading he could see himself. He wanted to get better and move up levels.  He didn't do it for anyone else.  You need to find a way for your son to have ambition that doesn't involve pleasing you.  
good luck!!!
Avatar universal
I'm going to give the same information as I did to "1st grade teacher can't reach" - I am wondering if the reason your son is unable to learn at school is that he is suffering from anxiety.  Often, ADD/ADHD is confused with the behaviours of anxiety.  I might suggest you google the phrase "anxiety behaviors of children" or "anxiety in school age children" or similar words/phrases.  

Of course, the previous poster specialmom could also have a point.  I really do not believe in overteaching a child at home; what is important is the exposure to many activities - both social and learning.  But, what you have said is so consistent with children suffering from anxiety - they are able to cope at home but not in a perceived, unsafe environment as the school.   Hope this helps ...
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