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Bi-Polar Disorder

I don't know that I have a question but more of support of parents with bi-polar disorder children.  

I have a 10 year old that was diagnosed with BP at the age of 7.  What the final straw was that led to the diagnosis was he was at his sitters house (the 4th one in a month) and he threatened to kill her and her children told them how he would do this and tried to knock over a 6 ft tall oak cabnit on her 6 year old and was caught playing with a dead bird.  Also was teaching her birds to say very bad things.  He was taken to the emergency room that day and they reluctently put him in a youth facility because we refused to take him home without some kind of help.  He spent two weeks in there without a honeymoon period.  Things kindof got better for him for a while.  He always seemed manic to my husband and myslelf.  

He would climb out on the roof and yell profanities at everyone around.  He stole a can of spraypaint off of a neighbors house and graffitied their house.  He would stand on the roof yelling profanities to everyone.  He broke eggs around my house constantly to the point I could no longer buy eggs at the store.  He would urinate on my floors, set fires, break things, be very defient, steal from everyone.  He broke out the van window while I was driving downtown dayton after throwing things at me while I was driving (books, tools etc....)  

He would be sent to foster homes for a while but when they could no longer handle it they would send him home to mom.  I got very fortunate (even though I did not think so at the time)  He was caught stealing a candy bar at a local grocery store and he had the money for it in his pocket.  They put him through the court system and he was given a probation officer.  He was also put into a program called bulding bridges and the RAP program (residental alternative program).  After being given more than enough chances (being put in a holding cell manytimes for 4 hours at a time) he was thrown out of or suspended enough in a two month period that the PO decided to put him into one of his foster homes. He was there for less than one week and he was told to clean his room and he went up there kicked the window out stood on the roof and proceeded to finish the window off.  He was drug backinto the house and was restrained from hurting himself or others and he bit the foster mother.  They then called the case worker over the foster and she took him to a nearby hospital.  He was evaluated for about 2 days and then they put him into (finally!!!!!!) a residental treatment center.  

Mind you all of this time we are being told that all of this is our fault.  We are bad parents and need to learn how to be better parents.(we are going through our 4th set of parenting classes in as many years)  

I have not cried yet (well only once but not for long)

I have felt this big sigh of releif now that he is away for a while and getting the proper treatment.  

I now have time for myself my husband (not the father of my children he is an angel) and my very neglected 13 year old (who has been taken off of all ADHD medications recently)  I now have time to teach him how to be human and not be doped up in some corner reading.  We now have a little money to take him golfing or to the batting cages and time for walks and a little love in there also.  Even though we have insurance the meds get very expensive we figured it out with my diabetic meds and the pych meds we were spending about 250 a month on meds every month.  

So if you have a child like this and you are being told it is your fault there are support groups on the net and other wise for you search you will find them work hard on bulding your self esteem and work very hard on finding what you need to make it from day to day.  Your answer may not look like the answer you need at first but it will all turn around in the end.  

Mind you this is not a cure for my child he is Bi-Polar deffinatly and this will be a continus struggle for the rest of his life we just need to teach him how to care for himself because in just 8 short years he will have total control of what happens to him and I want him to know how to ask for help and where to get it and for him to be able to control himself.

Good luck all,

If you want to talk to me my email address is ***@****  I will be more than happy to write back and forth with you.
3 Responses
242606 tn?1243782648
Dear Karen,

Thank you for telling your story - I'm sure it will help some parents who are experiencing the kinds of stressors you describe.

I do want to reassure parents of children with bipolar disorder that they can achieve stability. For this condition, medication is an absolute must, because the condition involves problems with brain chemistry and requires (usually) some form of mood stabilizer and antidepressant and, often, at least a brief period on a major tranquilizer/antipsychotic medication.
Avatar universal
I am a teacher of young children ( under 7 years of age) with special needs. I am interested in obtaining more information on bi polar disorder in children. Is there any connection to feotal alcohol syndrome?
Avatar universal

I want to tell you, you are doing a wonderful job with you son. I know it doesn't seen like you're doing anything, but you are. Trust me. I know how hard it is to handle a child with learning disables plus having Bi-polar. I know because I was just like your son, execpt I am older now. I have bi-polar for all my life plus having to deal with learning disables is pretty hard on both the parents and the child. I know everyone gets very upset after awhile. But the key thing to do is to give him love and all the support he needs . It gets better after ahile.  If there is alot of stress in the family  he will react on it.

Don't give up All he needs is love from both of his parents.

good luck
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