Concern for my son

[TCAWsMom]

My ex-husband and I divorced almost 5 years ago, when our son was 2.  Since that time, my son seems to feel responsible for his dad's happiness.  My ex-husband, engaged twice since, but never married has decided to focus on our son.  This means not dating or doing anything to interfere with our son's time with him.  Also, he purchases costly items almost weekly for our son, such as a video system or 3-4 games.  In addition, my son thinks no adult should ever raise their voice and if they do, they are a bad person.  After almost 5 years, I have re-married and have a 7 month old son as well.  Other than "deprogramming" after being with his dad, my son seems happy (life and expectation are viewed very differently between homes).  Howeevr, I am concerned.  My son wets the bed 1-2 times per night while at my house.  However, when with his father, he sleeps with him (always).  They go to bed together!! I do not think this is appropriate for my son, can you please shre a medical point of view and some suggestions.  I have tried talking to both of them.  

[danhowitt]

Very helpful Dr. Kennedy

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Please don't put your son in the position of having to answer to this. He is not responsible for the decisions his father makes. It would be better for your son if his father stopped this sleeping arrangement and stopped indulging him the way he does. However, your son will survive this. Try to focus your attention on your household and on being the best parent you can be when your son is with you. It won't help if you involve yourself in his father's decisions, unless his father is asking for your input. The nocturnal enuresis is not something to be concerned about. Your son is now at an age when you can consider some medication to address this. Another option is a wet-stop alarm. But intervention is entirely optional. You might discuss options with his pediatricuian.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

If you do an internet search for WET STOP ALARM, you will find a wealth of information (much of the information is provided by companies that market such alarms, but the information is useful nonetheless).

[danhowitt]

"Another option is a wet-stop alarm"

I'd be interested to read more about this option.  Thanks Dan Howitt.