DON'T LIKE MY SON

[Krissy13]

How can I pretend to like my son?  He's 7 years old and is a smart mouth and does the opposite of what I say ALL THE TIME.  I've punished him but it doesn't help.  I work and my husband stays home with him.  I know my husband needs to be more consistent and supply more structure and dicipline but he doesn't.  I get to the point where I go down to the basement right when I get home from work, shut the door and stay there all night.  I can't stand to be around him.  What should I do?  I want to love him and I find myself bonding with other kids because they act the way I would like my son to act.   I'm so lost, what should I do?

[margypops]

get help some therapy would be good .

[dylansmummy03]

Ive just googled 'I hate my son' and im so glad i found this. My just turned 8 yr old son is actually so badly behaved right now,for the first time in my life i screamed 'I hate you; to him. I love my son more than anything in this world but his behaviour is just so out of control right now,he is making my life a misery. My partner and I are arguing constantly over it as he is my little boys stepdad. He is strict with my son in discipline and recently as he has been so naughty, feel all we are doing is shouting at him and my partner is ready to walk too. My sons real dad has him one a week and is a loser,who doesnt discipline him at all. I actually have thoughts of putting my son into care too,although i never would. I feel terible for feeling this way,i just wish he would listen to me,do as hes told,so we can both love him again. He is an angel for everyone else,and at school,very quiet little boy. I work part time and i do do things with him,although my spare time is limited. I just want my little boy back. He is 8 but seriously turning more and more into a baby again.

[JojeeOgden]

I understand how you feel dear & I myself and im a similar situation...although he is my 6 year old step-son. I have tried and tried to like this kid. He never listens, tells me & his sister he hates me, interrupts and argues with me even about things he knows nothing about. harasses his sister, pees & poops his pants on purpose because it grosses me out, torments the neighbors dogs, screams at the top of his lungs when the other children are trying to sleep...and on and on and on. I am sorry...but why in the world should I like this kid when he so obviously does not like me and is a little jerk to his 2 sisters. Oh dont get me wrong, he's a perfect angel when his dad is around....most of the time. But im sorry..he is god awful, and his personality/behavior IS who he is. Most of the crap he does is willful & intentional. Why should I be nice & keep trying to get him to have a relationship with me,  just so he can dump on me.....I dont care if he is only 6 years old. So Krissy, dont worry...there are women out her who know exactly how you feel.

[just_saying2]

What I want to know is: how come if the kid was at home with his MOM all day we'd all blame the MOM for the kid's behavior? But with this kid who stays home with the dad all day (why?) we STILL blame the mom??? Me, I'd check out the dad's role in all this: is he passive aggressive---manipulating by subtly rewarding the kid for acting toward the mom as HE himself would like to??? Or maybe he just wants to make staying at home with the kid seem like an unattractive job so that he gets to avoid working??? (I'm sure stay-at-home moms know a few like this also?)

[margypops]

sorry this is so old and long ...I forgot to put the last post was for phasengod

[margypops]

the 11 yearold  jealous of the younger child ,'he is a parents dream' this is what you have said here about the youngest child  .no wonder the older child is unhappy , he probably picks up on that attitude ,maybe focus on his positive side and praise him when you see him doing something right, get his Dad doing guy things with him ,having fun and sports ..He is feeling left out ...