Defiance

[Snoop]

My 7 year old son seems to be do exactly the opposite of what is asked. His mother & I have been divorced for 2 years now. He has been told repeatedly not to do something and then he does it anyway. While in time out or during any part of his punishment, he continues to act out, have an attitude, or shows anger towards me because I am the one who punished him. He also will NEVER admit responsibility for his wrong doings. He recently took an item that did not belong to him, and when confronted he swears he didnt do it. Then once proven that he did do it, he continues to lie about the extent of it. Even thou slowly the truth is coming out, he will deny all until days later when he has no more room to wiggle out of it. Then, again once punished, he is angry at me! Please offer some advise as to how to get him to listen & behave like a happy 7 year old.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Your son may not be a happy 7-yr-old. That is, they key is to figure out if his behavior is within the normal spectrum for his age, or if the behavior is symptomatic of an emotional disorder. Now, from a behavior management point of view, there is no difference. You'd have to manage the behavior one way or the other. But, if the behavior signifies an emotional disorder, your son may require specialized intervention by a pediatric mental health professional. The way to figure this out is to have an evaluation. One way or the other, it won't hurt, and you'll be receiving valuable information in the process.

[Mittal]

The child won't know until it burns, that fire burns.  If you keep telling him not to touch fire, he won't understand what you are saying.
Showing a picture of an apple and telling him this is an apple, he understands.  But you show him grapes and say this is NOT apple, he is confused as to what else is it.  Instead of using negatives like NOT, use positives.
Try to look for means of changing your attitude towards the child and not look for a change in the child.  Look at him as a part of your heart and not as a part of the world existing around you, which makes you think that your child is not up to the mark.
Everyday early in the morning get up and say to yourself "My child is the best" and look at miracles happening around you.

Disclaimer-I AM NOT A DOCTOR.