My oldest daughter-my first of two blessings....and on most days my whirlwind of misbehavior.She's always been mommy's girl, and recently I feel like she's a complete stranger. She doesn't seem like a typical three year old. Even my grandmother who raised me... raise many, many children says she's beyond any typical child behavior-when I consulted her about the siutation. I thought maybe it's just how three year old's are-but she insists that none of the kids she's raised have ever taken it to the extent that Shaelyanna does. Even when my husband and I communicate, stick together, and use practical punishment it doesn't work. I've watch numerous super nanny shows, as weird as that sounds... and none of her advice seems to help me.
She's VERY intelligent, beyond her age. I know every mother thinks that, but I was enrolled in parents as teachers. This program can test your child at regular intervals to make sure they are mentally developing at a normal rate.... that you're doing your part as a mom to teach them the essentials. It's completely voluntary to be involved with this program, but even as a young mother I've always felt like you should begin your child's education as soon as possible, even reading to her in the womb. And she's always scored well beyond other children her age. She speaks like a 5 year old, not a 3 year old. The way she speaks and understands things constantly surprise everyone around her. But then, it's overshadowed by her lack of respect for anyone or anything. I don't know that her mind is beyond it's years.... or if the other children around here just have parents that never work with them or care about their mental development. I'm here because I'm concerned and need advice.
While she's incredibly bright, she's also very standoffish. She takes things to the extreme, even constantly talking bad to you while she's in time out. She speaks to me like she's already a friggin teenager. She tells me to leave her alone, to be quiet, to stop when I'm telling her what she's doing wrong. She pushes, she cusses sometimes.... she lies. And I believe she does KNOW and comprehend that she's lying to avoid trouble. She knows she's doing wrong. She doesn't much slap or hit, as much as push you if you walk by her. If you're trying to explain something to her she yells at you, saying, "OKAY MOM! FINE!"... she's is CONSTANTLY on the go. From one thing that she very well knows she SHOULD NOT have, to the next. She has the understanding that she shouldn't do these things, yet she does them anyway. She's on 24/7 and has problems going to sleep at night. Even when you create the proper bedtime situation. I suspect that she has ADHD. It does run in my husband's side of the family.. and my younger half brother has it as well... he's in prison at the age of 18 for 8 years. It worries me... that she's three and I feel like no matter what I do I can't control any situation with her. I don't really know how to make anyone understand. And I know she doesn't feel abandoned or anything because her father and I have always loved one another, been married, lived together, support her and her 2 month old sister on our own. We don't sponge off parents or other loved ones,we're completely independent and have always been. To me, she has a childhood that some 35 year olds can't provide for their children. We're good, loving, hard working parents, although we're only 21 and 23. We provide everything the babies need and more. They've never hurt or wanted for anything, especially their parents. We stay home without fail anytime we're not working. We spend ALL our time with them. If we go somewhere, they go with. We don't get babysitters or push the babies off on someone else. We have our children with US 24/7. So.... it can't be us, can it? We love both our children.... but I need advice on what to do. How do I handle a child that seems to be without any sense of behaving properly?
Even as a baby she was a very uptight, fussy, easily overstimulated baby. And my second child is her complete opposite. Very laid back and happy. Is this adhd??