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Eight year olds eating habits
My son (youngest of 4) will not eat a normal meal. He has never eaten meat, cooked vegtables, pizza, burgers, bread etc. He will eat cereal peanut butter on crackers grapes peeled apples banannas carrots raisins yogart pancakes & waffels milk & ice cream. This is it. Every meal everyday consists of these things and nothing more. He will eat candy & soft drinks if we let him but with his very limited diet we do limit the junk. Our pediatrition says he will grow out of it but should we continue to wait. When we go out to dinner we prepare a plate with two fruits, peanut butter crackers & milk. At what point do you seek professional help for a child? What is this type of problem called? I have searched the internet and most eating disorders involve anorexia.
My son appears healthy. He is 8. Good energy levels and sleeps well. No problems in school and we are careful not to let his siblings tease although it does happen occasionally. He has been this way since he was 18 months old. As a toddler he would eat spagetti peanut butter & Jelly sandwiches & grilled cheese sandwiches but stopped eating those at around the age of 2.
No breads of any kind. No cooked foods. No meat.
Several weeks ago I asked him why he would not try other foods he said "I am scared". I think he means he is scared he might get sick. Once my wife tried preparing a plate of food like everyone else in the family was eating. She put the plate in front of him. He gagged just thinking his mother was going to make him eat. He does not even like to be at the dinner table when we eat.
Thanks you so much for any insight. We do not know where to start to help my son. You may even think we are overconcerned and that time will take care of the problem
Thanks
Matthews dad
My son appears healthy. He is 8. Good energy levels and sleeps well. No problems in school and we are careful not to let his siblings tease although it does happen occasionally. He has been this way since he was 18 months old. As a toddler he would eat spagetti peanut butter & Jelly sandwiches & grilled cheese sandwiches but stopped eating those at around the age of 2.
No breads of any kind. No cooked foods. No meat.
Several weeks ago I asked him why he would not try other foods he said "I am scared". I think he means he is scared he might get sick. Once my wife tried preparing a plate of food like everyone else in the family was eating. She put the plate in front of him. He gagged just thinking his mother was going to make him eat. He does not even like to be at the dinner table when we eat.
Thanks you so much for any insight. We do not know where to start to help my son. You may even think we are overconcerned and that time will take care of the problem
Thanks
Matthews dad
I was having similar problems with my six year old. I used to cater meals specifically to his picky taste. I used heathy foods, but we were still very limited. Then I got married, and my husband and I enjoy a variety of different foods. I decided I was not going to prepare two separate meals. He could either eat, or not eat...no snacks. It's taken time, but now he's used to seeing new foods on the table. He'll still complain, but we have a rule that he has to at least try everything once. If he doesn't like it he doesn't have to eat it. Sometimes after he's tried a food for the 4th time, he'll suddenly decide he likes it. It has dramatically improved mealtime.
I am not an expert at this. I am having similiar problems with my 8 year old daughter. Pleas read "The Out of Sync Child" by Carol Kranowitz. I have recently read this book and what you wrote is almost exactly what I read in this book. Please check it out.
I have a question:
If your son refused to voluntarily bathe and screamed everytime you even mentioned the possibility of taking a bath or shower, would you allow him to stop bathing?
Consuming unbalanced meals - long term - can cause future health problems, sickness and disease, including depression and such. These problems may not show up until well into adulthood.
Your son sounds like a wonderful child in that he has strong, independent behaviors that will someday serve him well. However, your son has YOU trained and he is controlling you.
Dr. Phil has done shows on this very subject and I completely agree with his suggestions. I practice this with my own children. My 7 year old son in particular is a very pickey eater and quite stubborn! However, be prepared. You son will resent you, perhaps loudly. My son had screaming fits and temper tantrums at first which we ignored. Evenutally things will calm down.
When you prepare a family meal, make sure you have a little of everything - meat, veggies that are cooked and raw, fruit, milk, slices of cheese, rolls or bread and butter, etc. Prepare his plate with a bite or two of each food. Make it clear that he cannot have seconds of ANYTHING until he consumes a bite of everything on his plate, and he MUST sit with the family whether he eats or not. This teaches him respect.
If he refuses to eat, so be it. BUT, he gets NOTHING else until the next meal and you need to make sure he understands this. In between meals he will be hungry. Simply remind him that this was his choice.
At the next meal, do the same thing and continue. You may not see positive results for up to 2 - 3 weeks. Many parents fear that their kids need to eat something because their child will never give in. This simply is not true. Eventually, he WILL eat because eating is like breathing, instinct will take over sooner or later.
As for going out to eat, it's silly to make him a plate. Make sure you go to restaurants that offer a menu with variety. If he refuses everything on the menu, then he can sit there with his family with nothing in front of him. Again, that's his choice.
If you stick with this and remain calm - soon your son will be trying new foods. Good Luck!
If your son refused to voluntarily bathe and screamed everytime you even mentioned the possibility of taking a bath or shower, would you allow him to stop bathing?
Consuming unbalanced meals - long term - can cause future health problems, sickness and disease, including depression and such. These problems may not show up until well into adulthood.
Your son sounds like a wonderful child in that he has strong, independent behaviors that will someday serve him well. However, your son has YOU trained and he is controlling you.
Dr. Phil has done shows on this very subject and I completely agree with his suggestions. I practice this with my own children. My 7 year old son in particular is a very pickey eater and quite stubborn! However, be prepared. You son will resent you, perhaps loudly. My son had screaming fits and temper tantrums at first which we ignored. Evenutally things will calm down.
When you prepare a family meal, make sure you have a little of everything - meat, veggies that are cooked and raw, fruit, milk, slices of cheese, rolls or bread and butter, etc. Prepare his plate with a bite or two of each food. Make it clear that he cannot have seconds of ANYTHING until he consumes a bite of everything on his plate, and he MUST sit with the family whether he eats or not. This teaches him respect.
If he refuses to eat, so be it. BUT, he gets NOTHING else until the next meal and you need to make sure he understands this. In between meals he will be hungry. Simply remind him that this was his choice.
At the next meal, do the same thing and continue. You may not see positive results for up to 2 - 3 weeks. Many parents fear that their kids need to eat something because their child will never give in. This simply is not true. Eventually, he WILL eat because eating is like breathing, instinct will take over sooner or later.
As for going out to eat, it's silly to make him a plate. Make sure you go to restaurants that offer a menu with variety. If he refuses everything on the menu, then he can sit there with his family with nothing in front of him. Again, that's his choice.
If you stick with this and remain calm - soon your son will be trying new foods. Good Luck!
I would see if you can involve him in preparing a simple meal that involves something he normally won't eat. No pressure; he doesn't have to eat it, but be sure you exclaim over how good it is. Kids may taste something if they have had a hand in creating it.
I grew up not eating a thing, according to my mother! Somehow I survived.
For my own kids, they grew up with me serving them whatever we ate (keeping it to simple, common foods). If they ate, they ate. If not, no big deal. They got a small snack before bed anyway. But no way would I prepare a different dinner for them, we weren't going down that route! They went through spells of not eating, but eventually they would eat whatever we were having. I usually did not give them snacks, except for a small healthy after school snack. But, as I said, they chose to eat it or not. I didn't force them about it at all.
I grew up not eating a thing, according to my mother! Somehow I survived.
For my own kids, they grew up with me serving them whatever we ate (keeping it to simple, common foods). If they ate, they ate. If not, no big deal. They got a small snack before bed anyway. But no way would I prepare a different dinner for them, we weren't going down that route! They went through spells of not eating, but eventually they would eat whatever we were having. I usually did not give them snacks, except for a small healthy after school snack. But, as I said, they chose to eat it or not. I didn't force them about it at all.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
As long as he is developing well, and it sounds like he is, there really is no reason to intervene. The pediatrician must be comfortable that your son is well from a medical standpoint. In order to be sure he is receiving adequate amounts of vitamins and minerals it might be prudent to have him take a daily multi-vitamin, but apart from that I'd let it be. Such preferences during childhood usually do wane over time, particularly as children enter the pre-adolescent years. I imagine you'll see this as well.
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