7 year old behavior

[carrrie189]

I have a 7 year old daughter whom my husband and I adopted at 3 after her mother lost custody and then signed away her parental rights. Her father was never in the picture. We have experienced some very difficult times and have come a long way throught therapy for her and us as well, but we are currently experiencing our daughter acting incredibly embarrassed by my husband and myself anytime we go anywhere. In first grade she would revolt if I tried to kiss her goodbye, or even say goodbye. We recently took her to a fair and she was too embarrassed to even have a good time. Is this normal? What can we do? We have tried talking about this excessively to absolutley no change in behavior, I expected this at maybe 11 but 7? She recently told me it was because she did not know dad well. And she does not show him affection a lot. But she turns it on and off so much I dont know what to think anymore.

[carrrie189]

Thank you for your response. I was only figureatively "pulling my hair out" but I appreciate the term none the less.

[jdtm]

Sorry - can't help you then.  Anxiety can manifest itself in many disguises.  Do note that  pulling out one's hair is an anxiety disorder called Trichotillomania.  

[carrrie189]

Actually the exact opposite, she is very outgoing and very social. She does not have any trouble initiating or making friendships. It is honestly like we are experiencing puberty, talking back, lying, manipulating, and embarrased to be seen with parents. Pulling hair out daily?

[jdtm]

I'm wondering if what you are seeing are signs of social anxiety.  Is she quite shy?  Does she have trouble initiating conversation or play with other children?  Is she hesitant before approaching others or in other ways?  If so, I might suggest you google the phrase "social anxiety and children" or "behaviors of anxiety in children" to see if these articles remind you of your daughter.  If so, please write back and let us know.