How can I get my kids to listen and respect me?

[clewis]

How can I get my kids to listen and respect me and others?  I have three children and they are out of control. My daughter is 14, she does nothing I ask, she steals,lies, and very defiant. My son who is 7 does nothing I ask, he laughs at me when asked to do something or help with something, and also laughs when I disipline him. Last my 5 year old daughter is very demanding, her way or no way. I cant take anymore of my kids driving me to be depressed and stressed. I just burst into tears everyday for how they act no respect, destroy my house, breaking doors, windows, and dont listen. I've done parenting class, counseling, with them and they think its all a joke. Please Help, does anyone have anything else I can try or do, I've takin things away, grounded them everything and its not working.

[specialmom]

Honestly, I think you were on the right track with parenting classes.  Do these kids do alright in school?  Is this mainly at home?  Our school promotes a program for parents called "love and logic".  There is a book of the same name and a website you can visit.  Basically, natural consequences.  I wouldn't drive my child anywhere if they spoke rudely to me.  I wouldn't yell about it, but they are making a choice and there are consequences.  So check out that book/website and see what you think.  good luck

[Rucnfun]

unfortunately the younger ones are watching how the older ones act and they are going to follow in there footsteps until this comes to a stop. Do you have respect for YOURSELF? i know that sounds silly, but if we don't respect ourselves then our kids won't respect us either. sounds like the 14 yr old has an issue with anger, like she is very angry about something. i would first try talking with her without getting mad. it could be that your attention is to the other 2 kids and she feels left out many reasons etc. don't yell at your kids tho. They will think that it's okay to yell if you yell. So set a good example by the way that you respond to things.