Is this normal?

[redneckwoman79]

I have three female children; ages 11, 5, and 3. My concerns lay with my 5 year old. She is a very intelligent little girl; advanced in her education compared to her peers; however, despite this I am concerned about her social developments per say. Around the age of 18 months she began to have problems with incontinence. We are are sure how the problem began, but it  has continued until her current age. We have been treating the problem with Myralax in hopes that she will regain sensation and be able to make bowel movements without a reminder. My primary concerns are with her forgetfullness and anger issues. She is angry a good majority of each day, and often without cause; even of which she can't describe why. She has even remarked how odd she finds experiencing happiness. Along with this, she is often considerably forgetful. Not your average forgetfulness. For example, I will give her an immediate instructruction and on the way to completing the task she will forget what she was supposed to be doing. The same occurs when she approaches me with a question. She will begin to ask the question and immediately forget what she was about to ask. This happens very often throughout the average day. In addition to the daily mood of anger and frustration, she often has night terrors in which she verbalizes her anger in her sleep; 3 to 5 times a week. She also has elevated fears to include what seems to be mild chlosterphobia. A fear of small places seems to be somewhat normal, but also a firmer hug or being held will cause severe panic. All of these behaviors combined are beginning to
cause me great concern. Actually they have for some time, but I need to find out if these are normal for her age or if my concerns have justification.
In response to these behaviors, I have strived to be patient and try to explain things in simple manner to her and avoid situations that may cause her undo stress. Our method of discipline is generally a time out followed by her explanation of why the disciplinary action occured. I don't raise my voice very often, but try to be stern in my expectations. Are these behaviors normal or could their be an underlying problem that needs to be addressed?

[meniere135]

Now that my kids are getting older (12,14, and 18) I can see, with all their quirks, friend troubles, school problems, and physical issues that life continues onward.  They are surviving the storms.  They bumble along and manage life as it comes.  With three kids the **** is always hitting the proverbial fan (as you well know).  With your middle daughter, you'll have to wait and see how things go when she starts school.  My middle daughter, on her first day, buried her head in my pants when kids would come up to her and ask her to play.  She absolutely refused.  The kindergarten teacher called her "a piece of work" (I was hurt and had a good cry).  But now she is 14, has several good friends, and is making more in high school.  She got a big group of kids together to go to the movies.  I had to help her along the way, but now things are so much better for her.  She still has some issues - anxiety that comes and goes, she hates her nose and says no guy will ever like her, etc.  But, gee, we all have issues.  My kids are probably two steps away from Asperger's syndrome.  And so far, they are ok.  I never thought I would say that.  We're still standing.  Just help your daughter as best you can, be patient with her and give her time alone with you and show her that you really like spending time with her.  If you just want to vent or ask me questions, leave me a note.
Keep smiling!

[redneckwoman79]

I am so at a loss here. I think I have always know she was born that something was always off, but I could never put my finger on it. She has met and more often exceeded developmental milestones as she has grown. Even in educational standards she is considerably advanced than her peers. When she interacts with them she shows genuine care and concern and desire to help others. However, when it comes to play, she more often than not requires another individual to play with or an adult to help her find something to do. Often her play with her little sister though, is done in a very managerial state. She also has encompresis, though it has never been medically diagnoses, due to lazy healthcare physicians. We have fought that battle since she was 18 months old; a bad case of diarrhea began a vicious cycle of constipation for years. She does become easily overwhelmed and stressed when things don't work out to her liking. Ironically enough though, regarding depression, that is something that runs in my family and I am currently taking medications for. I was also recently diagnosed with adult ADD. No big surprise there really. Otherwise I have been researching my toosh off trying to find something that will help me understand what I can do to help her. It's like you said, children that age are normally happy go-lucky and my other two children are, but she struggles to find that natural carefree joy and even becomes baffled when she does experience the emotion. Her body weight tends to be normal for what I can tell and based on growth charts and such. But between her odd moods and her insane forgetfulness, I just know something isn't right. It's just getting someone else to listen that can help me help her ya know. Thank you so much for your reply and insight. Its kind of relieving to talk to someone that gets it.

[Gina04]

This sounds a lot like Asperger's to me.  My husband and four year old son both have it.  I would have her evaluated by a developmental specialist.  If it is not Asperger's but is something similar, the specialist would probably be able to determine what is going on.